Ineffective “COEXIST” Bumper Stickers Recalled

Tard Times - Washington DC: The National Highway Traffic Safety Board along with The Consumer Protection Agency have issued a product recall for over 500,000 units of the popular “COEXIST” bumper sticker due to an ineffective and unsustainable message of world peace, U.S. safety regulators said on Monday.

“After the immeasurable millions of incidents of human suffering and death due to war, muslim intolerance and genocide from the years of 623 AD through 2016, this sticker needs to be pulled from retail shelves and all automobiles immediately,” the NHTSB said in a statement online. “NHTSB likes the sticker,” the statement continued. “We believe it looks really cool in a tie-dye color scheme. In the current geopolitical climate, however, our in-house statisticians predict this trend in which people get shot, stabbed and have their heads forcefully removed will not slow down in the foreseeable future.”

The graphic, spelling “Coexist” through religious and political symbols, has garnered thousands of complaints from consumers for inefficacy, despite regular appearance on the rear bumpers of cars owned by progressive Americans. “I had a feeling something wasn’t working back there. I heard some rattling on NPR about crises in Europe, the Middle East, Africa… even America,” said Subaru Outback owner Wayne Darvy of Burlington, Vt. “How can sticker companies just sit back and profit from a clearly unattainable mantra? I feel duped.” 

“Unfortunately, with Donald Trump’s presidency, we foresee demand for left-leaning slogan products dropping considerably. We’re particularly worried about ‘Have A Nice Day’. Studies show nice days are highly unlikely,” spokesperson Amy Kane told reporters outside of their Detroit manufacturing plant. “Luckily, the forecast for "Truck Nutz" and "Make America Great Again" through Q3 2020 projects record profits.” 

“We encourage all owners to peel off their ‘COEXIST’ with soap and water and bring it to your local Spencer Gifts, where you will receive a " أنت مارس الجنس " bumper sticker free of charge,” she said.

I Wonder.......

 If you were to take these men by the hand and walk them through London today,

would they feel utterly betrayed?

Thank You MJA for the Linkage!

A Good Monday Morning

How's That Muslim Mayor Workin' Out For Ya London????

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

* No Tuxedos Required *

Brought to You By BLUESJUNKY: Honorary Chair of Music - Middle Finger Symphony Music Director

Meanwhile, Back At NASA's Climate Change Research Dept. Annual Budget Meeting

Clinton Points Boney Finger At Middle Finger News

CNN World - After blaming the Russians, WIKI Leaks, Trump Operatives, the DNC, her Campaign Staff, James Comey, Tweeter, Facebook, Climate Change and Toenail Fungus for her unexpected loss in November, Thursday Hillary Clinton again skirted her own blame by pointing a crooked arthritic finger at the up and coming Media Giant 'Middle Finger News Service' and it's Corporate Owner, Diogenes Middle Finger.com INC.

Speaking before a gathering of Adult Diaper Manufactures Thursday, Mrs. Clinton fired both her whining barrels at the respected news organization as she became visibly upset:  

"I took great care to warn my replacement as Secretary of State, Senator John Kerry, about this vicious bunch at Middle Finger News, who he later labeled "Unamerican, Uncosmopolitan, Despicable Hooligans" after his own experiences with them.  I directly blame them for playing a large part in my ......*BURP*.... election loss for the false and totally unfair  portrayal of me to the American electorate. Especially that elusive witch who goes by the name Diogenes and her cohort.... that smartass Earl of Taint, both for their vicious satire and distorted imagery of me as a Drunken, Bumbling, Bloated, Radical Grandmother and Crime Family Boss with one foot in the grave. It's a G** D*** good thing for the whole bunch of them that I didn't get elected!!!"...... Those Rat Bastards are gonna pay!!........You HEAR ME!!!!!"

Mrs. Clinton then began repeatedly banging her head on the podium and broke down in tears and a raging coughing fit, and had to be helped off and attended to backstage.

When CNN contacted the MFNS HQ about the statement by Clinton, an unnamed MFNS spokesman refused comment, but the newsroom was heard to break out in uproarious laughter. When our reporter informed the spokesman he had never heard of Middle Finger News Service before, the spokesman laughed and responded "Don't get out much do ya Skippy? Shit, Go ask Anderson Cooper, we made him cry too!"

We Are All Doomed: Trump Covfefe'd The World

Leftist React to Trump's Decision To Exit From The Paris Climate Accord