Sunday, February 2, 2020

Don’t Oppress My People With Your Norms Of Punctuality


The pathologies of the left are now apparently hellbent on radicalizing just about everything. And will seemingly perform any contortion to that end. From Tulane University, the very heart of White Devil Babylon - uptown New Orleans - student Shahamat Uddin (pronouns “he, him, his”) howls in protest:
"Punctuality centers whiteness. It is far easier for white men to get to work on time than Black people who are having to change their hair to fit the workplace’s professionalism standards."
It’s a hair thing, yes, and therefore terribly political, a hill to die on. But it’s even more than that. It’s also the devastating suspicion that you might be more likely to get hired if you remove your nose piercing, if only during office hours. So now, dressing and acting “professional” is racist … and "rooted in white supremacy."

Tulane University. Where tuition is a mere $60,000 a year. And where the oppressed huddle for comfort against the Cold Winds of Whiteness.

Shahamat Uddin is Bangladeshi...he's just a very tan Caucasian guy. With straight hair. From that country next to India. A nose ring is Hindu, I think...maybe? Religion, not color.

White people with nose rings are also asked to remove them in most instances. He wants special dispensation for race? And why is he banging on about Black people and their hair? You see, wondering whether that nose piercing will be frowned upon, by employers or their customers, constitutes "systemic white supremacy," a crushing phenomenon “that is barring us from maximal success.”

It’s a "sacrifice," an outrage, proof of being downtrodden. Because nose jewelry is pivotal to both optimal functioning and mental wellbeing. And questions of whether such piercings are ideal for a given workplace - however unspecified and theoretical those questions may be - amount to further, damning proof that "this country was not made for me."
"I have learned when and where it is to my own disadvantage to be too Brown or too gay or too immigrant." 
Once again, Tulane University. Where tuition is a mere $60,000 a year. And where the oppressed huddle for comfort against the Cold Winds of Whiteness.

The leftist fixation with race and supposed racial victimhood, and with identitarian theatre generally – as if being black or gay or whatever were the most important and interesting thing about a person - is monotonous. I just wish they’d vary their pretensions and neuroses now and then.


~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Saturday, February 1, 2020

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

~ NO TUXEDOS REQUIRED ~


Brought To You By BLUESJUNKY: Chair of Music - Middle Finger Symphony Music Director

Friday, January 31, 2020

Nations Mental Health Experts on High Alert Ahead of Senate Impeachment Vote

Dr. Lucius Diculius MD. PhD. PsyD. 

Middle Finger News Service Exclusive:

The nation's top Therapist and Private Mental Health Counselors are on high alert ahead of the expected ending of the impeachment trial of President Donald Trump.  Dr. Throckmorton D. Crebs of the Manhattan Hospital's Mental Unit in NYC told Middle Finger News Service in a phone interview that they expect a horde of patients if the impeachment trial ends in acquittal.

"Our hospital's largest group of patients are members of the news media seeking therapy the last three years.  They come mostly to us for esteem problems stemming from the fact they know that no one believes them anymore, and they realize no one really likes them except their dogs.  And in some cases, we have found even that is a problem," Crebbs told MFNS.  "It's strange territory between their ears."

"But now, if impeachment fails, there is going to be some angry people of the leftist persuasion who staked their entire reputation as experts on impeachment show panel appearances out there kicking puppies, wandering the streets mumbling to themselves and going on epic benders for days. And don't even get me started about those ranting plastic drama queens of the theater district....... Hey, this interview is off the record, right???"

The famous west coast psychotherapist to the stars, Los Angles Dr. Lucius Diculius told MFNS he is alarmed that he may witness again a landslide of anti-Trump media and show biz celebrities mentally out on the ledge and beating down his door all hour of the night needing reassurances that their fantasy world will survive their ongoing nightmare. 

"Those coked-out f**king Hollywood creeps are the worst", the Doctor told us. "I had grown multi-millionaires sobbing at my feet like a two-year-old after the 2016 election. And G*D Dammit I just got them medicated correctly and pacified after the Mueller Report debacle with the assurance they had him dead straight this time with impeachment !!! And now This!!  Oh, Holy Shit! I need a drink."

Developing.....

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Bette Midler Exercises Her Inner ‘Tokyo Rose’


Tokyo Rose was a name given by Allied troop to in English-speaking radio broadcaster of Japanese propaganda working to demoralize troops abroad and their families at home by exaggerating and emphasizing wartime difficulties and military losses. Tokyo Rose, Hanoi Jane, and now.....Malibu Bette! There’s a lot of talk about “propaganda” these days, what with fake news and all. But Midler has actually regressed to crude 20th-century fascist tropes of mass persuasion on the tweeter:
Yes, Republican regretters! In your sore hearts, you know the Resistance Army is right and must win! Lay down your Second-Amendment weapons of war. Surrender! Save yourselves and your country. Your Bad Orange President has hypnotized you, and you have fallen low. Reclaim your individuality and self-respect. The left is not your enemy. We are your friends. Join us for peace!
Are you tired of the fight, Republican regretters? Are you lonely out there, with no one on TV to reflect your beliefs? Are you sick of batty actors, shriveled old singers, and humorless comedians calling you bigots, filling your ear holes with condescending abuse day after day? You can make it stop. It’s not hard. Pick up your ethics, morals, and values (which as used by Malibu Bette are all synonyms, BTW) and dump them in the garbage on your way over to the Left Side before it's to late. 

I wonder. Does Malibu Bette’s use of Tokyo Rose cant qualify as cultural appropriation? And has Bette committed racism by aping the historical propaganda techniques of East Asian peoples of color without their consent?

[RS Diaries]


Wednesday, January 29, 2020

The Beto O’Rourke of Georgia Threatens to Banish Trump Supporters from Society


The state of Georgia is known for their most excellent peanuts, but are quickly becoming known for political nuts too, like Tank Abrams, Hank Johnson and Jon Ossoff.

You remember democrat man-child Jon Ossoff? He’s the millennial douchebag democrat that burned through $30 million of liberal Hollywood money to lose a U.S. Rep. special election in Georgia. Well, he’s back and running for Senate as the “cancel culture” candidate. His platform seems to be that he will banish all Trump supporters from society and destroy conservatism.

Presumably he’s counting on a lot more celebrity dollars to make this happen. After taking some time to lick his wounds, the Beto of Georgia is now running for the U.S. Senate. If this video is any indication of his campaign to come, his latest effort to lose and waste other people’s money will be very entertaining.

In what looks like 
karaoke night at a TGI Friday’s or an Applebees, Ossoff is seen yelling at people in the bar, while others look like they are trying to enjoy their meals.
“We need to send a message this year. We need to send a message that if you indulge this kind of politics, you’re not just going to get beaten, your’e going to get beaten so bad you can never run or show your face again in public. Because we have had enough! Absolutely enough of what we are getting from Donald Trump and his fellow travelers.”
That’s some bold talk from a guy who has literally never beaten anyone, even with the financial and PR support of Hollywood celebrities. Ossoff says that he and his kind have had enough of whatever they’re getting from Trump supporters. Guess what? Trump supporters, Republicans, and conservatives have had enough from whiny-ass liberal soyboy snowflakes threatening to cancel us all the time.

Ossoff might want to clue himself onto is the sad tale of Beto O’Rourke. Once a democratic party superstar, poor Beto slunk back to his hipster doofus habitat in disgrace.  Hollywood liberals backed him as a way of indirectly going after Trump.  Once O’Rourke was no longer a useful idiot in their proxy war on Trump and leftist discovered what a goober he is, they turned their backs on him. The same thing will happen to Ossoff.

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Tuesday, January 28, 2020

Squinty & Meat Puppet's Cheap Imitation of Don Lemon's Laughing Clown Show

Squinty Joe probable stayed up all night to write this dialogue because we all know he's not smart enough to do it off the cuff....


[NewsBusters]

Monday, January 27, 2020

New York Times Ask Dem Candidates Which Celebrity They Would Most Like To Bang


It's just a week until the Iowa vote and the Democrat primary field will soon narrow to just 30 or so candidates. They've spent hours at Democratic debates most of us didn't watch droning on about screwing up your health care or their thrilling plans to tax the hell outta you so they can give you everything for free. As we mercifully get ready to say goodbye to some, let's learn a little bit about them as people who occasionally like us get horny.

The New York Times asked some of the remaining Democrat candidates 20 questions, one of which was to give voters a peek into their mental Cinemax and reveal their celebrity crushes. I think the answers will thrill you. They may shock you. They might even horrify you.

First up is clear winner Amy Klobuchar, who chose Prince. It's not just that the senator and the music legend are both from Minnesota. It's simply the only correct answer. She responded without hesitation, so it's obvious she's had sex to his music. I'm too polite to speculate as to which Prince album was playing while Klobuchar's daughter was conceived. All I'll say is that if there's some serious nakedness going on in the vicinity of Prince's music someone's getting pregnant. That's science.

Lizzy Warren came in a strong second with The Rock. She even still calls him the Rock. "Dwayne Johnson" can make all the versions of The Fast and the Furious and Jumanji that moviegoers can stomach. He can even churn out some more family-friendly crap like Tooth Fairy. Warren's only interested in what the Rock is cooking while strutting his stuff in tight spandex. For a moment while Warren was giving her answer, it seemed as if she forgot the cameras were there, closed her eyes, and sampled the candy. Don't leave our girl in a room alone with the Rock, especially if Klobuchar loaned her a copy of Diamonds and Pearls.


Mike Bloomberg was the weirdest. He selected both Laura Dern and William H. Macy. He's a billionaire. He can cast whoever he wants in his orgies.  Tom Steyer went with the safer but still dope choice of Alicia Keys. The lady can sing, and she's fine. No chance Tom.

Andy Yang took the path you're supposed to if you're married and want to remain so. "I think my wife's a star and I've got a big crush on her."  Aww, that's sweet. But let's cut the crap.

Mayor Pete was the lone spoilsport interviewed. He claimed his celebrity crush was "not for The New York Times to know about." Teen Vogue covers celebrity crushes. This is the most innocuous ice breaker question imaginable. Is he afraid voters will think he lacks gravitas if he admits he would dig playing rump rangers with Mr. Sulu??  Bloomberg offered us wacky threesome scenarios, and Warren had an on-camera orgasm. Buttigieg's a Rhodes scholar. We think he can safely answer one random question without killing his campaign. Okay, maybe in his case the wiser move is to say nothing.

[The New York Times]
[Wonkette]

~ Thank You WHATFINGERNEWS & MJA@IOTWReport for the Linkage! ~

A Good Monday Morning