Showing posts sorted by date for query John Kerry. Sort by relevance Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by date for query John Kerry. Sort by relevance Show all posts

Wednesday, July 19, 2023

John Kerry Proves He's Still Inept at That Policy Stuff


Biden administration climate czar, the venerable Duke of Heinz - Earl of Ketchup - second rate former Secretary of State John Kerry, leaves Beijing with no deal, no potential deal, not a wisp of a deal, just his bag of dirty clothes. He announced Wednesday after three days of climate negotiations with Xi Jinping's government, he did succeed in having long and very detailed meetings with a lot very frank conversations, lots of fine dining and chardonnay, but it is clear that we are going to need a little more work to complete our task.  Translation: Kerry failure to return with any sort of climate agreement comes as another embarrassment to the Biden administration.

During Kerry's time in Beijing, Xi poured cold water on the Biden administration's attempts at climate diplomacy by not meeting with Kerry during the visit and on Tuesday, reiterating his nation's climate goals "will never be influenced by others." Xi basical told Kerry to have a fortune cookie and buzz off horseface. We got coal power plants to build. 

Leaving Beijing, Kerry looked "haggard and somewhat out of his mind", ranting about conservative bloggers in the U.S. making fun of him, and that he "needed an earth shaking international agreement to show those bastards!"

John F. Kerry, the multiple Purple Heart recipient no one pays any attention but his dogs, now desperately watches most of his political legacy, mainly the fraud of an Iran nuclear deal, the ridiculous climate change accord as well as the crown jewel of his foreign policy efforts, the Non-Aggression Pact with Canada, all being regulated to the dumpster of historical blunders.

Wednesday, February 16, 2022

Your Official Semi-World Famous Irredeemable Mid-Week Open Thread

Your Beloved Blog Editrix Turns Things Over to You, the Readers.
 Please Keep All Weapons In Plain Sight 
____________________

This Week Your Hump Day Open Thread Is Sponsored By: 
MIDDLE FINGER NEWS SERVICE 
"Unamerican and Uncosmopolitan, Despicable Hooligans".....John Kerry



Thursday, November 4, 2021

Throwback Thursday: Hillary Clinton Points Boney Finger At Middle Finger News


from the dank archives of Middle Finger News Service - June 2017

CNN2 - After blaming the Russians, WIKI Leaks, Trump Operatives, the DNC, her Campaign Staff, Tweeter, Facebook, Climate Change and Tree Fungus for her unexpected defeat in November, Hillary Clinton again Thursday skirted her own blame by pointing a crooked arthritic finger at the up and coming Media Giant 'Middle Finger News Service' and it's Corporate Owner, Diogenes Middle Finger.com Inc.

Speaking Thursday during a gathering of the 'Dental Floss Farmers of America' convention, Mrs. Clinton fired both barrels at the respected news organization as she became visibly upset:  
"I took great care to warn my replacement as Secretary of State, Senator John Kerry, about this vicious bunch at Middle Finger News, who he later labeled "Unamerican, Uncosmopolitan, Despicable Hooligans" after his own personal experiences with them. 
I directly blame them, in all confidence, for playing a large part in my ......*BURP*.... election loss for the false and totally unfair  portrayal of me to the American electorate. 
Especially that elusive witch who goes by the name Diogenes and her cohort.... that smartass Earl of Taint, both for their vicious satire and distorted imagery of me as a Drunken, Bumbling, Bloated, Radical Grandmother and Crime Family Boss with one foot in the grave. They make a mockery of the First Amendment!
It's a G** D*** good thing for the whole bunch of them that I didn't get elected!!!"...... Those Rat Bastards are gonna pay!!........You HEAR ME!!!!!....YOU'RE GOIN DOWN!!!
Shaking violently, Mrs. Clinton began repeatedly banging her head on the podium, breaking down in tears and a raging coughing fit, having to be helped off and attended to backstage.

When CNN contacted the offices of Middle Finger News Service about the statement by Clinton, an unnamed MFNS spokesman refused comment, but the newsroom was heard in the background to break out in uproarious laughter. 

When our reporter informed the spokesman he had never heard of Middle Finger News Service before, the spokesman laughed and responded "Don't get out much do ya Skippy? Shit, Go ask Anderson Cooper, we made him cry too!"

Sunday, August 8, 2021

That Time Kim Jong Un Visited Martha's Vineyard.

Back before he became a permanent resident of the island, Barky Obama was known to bundling his extended tribe, advisors, 82% of the Secret Service and sympathetic journalist and swoop in and disrupt the beleaguered island known as "Hollywood East" during August.  It was 8 nightmarish days and nights of shut down roads and restricted movement for inhabitants of Martha’s Vineyard, who, from previous visits residents had come to liken the Obama vacation/birthday invasion to an Outbreak of Herpes.

In 2014, there were other uninvited guests to the area and our own DMF/MIDDLE FINGER NEWS SERVICE INTERNATIONAL broke the exclusive story:

MFNS Archives August 9, 2014

North Korea Spies on Obama's Martha's Vineyard Vacation

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS:


(MFNS Pyongyang) -The North Korean News Agency announced moments ago that the DPRK Navy had successfully completed a secret spy mission purposely directed at the  arrival  of the Presidential entourage on Martha's Vineyard. Nork News said the mission involved the DPRK Navy's first long voyage of their newest secret weapon, a propane/electric hybrid powered long range "Dung Class" submarine.  (photos below)

A Military spokesman said the submarine was able to penetrate the Nantucket Sound under the cover of darkness Friday morning and navigate in daylight the coastal waters of Martha's Vineyard by running shallow while towing a cardboard cutout of Secretary of State John Kerry on a windsurfing board, assuring no one would pay any attention or come near.

The newest addition to the DPRK arsenals secret voyage was commanded by the North Korean Supreme Leader himself, 1st Admiral Kim Jong Un. The mission included spending 18 hours off Cape Cod Friday to gather intelligence and two undetected passes through the Vineyard Sound in daylight on Saturday.

The major news agencies remain skeptical of the story, but MFNS have obtained exclusive Nork Naval photos taken on the mission as proof the North Koreans did indeed pull off the spy mission undetected.

{Photos Courtesy of North Korean Navy}

North Korean Sub 001 surfaces the morning of Aug 8 off the coast of Cape Cod near the
Kennedy Compound to check for intelligence (sources said none was found)





Under the cover of thick early morning fog Aug 9, waiting the arrival of the mission target,   
Kim Jung un discusses the days mission strategy with his officers.





Trolling the coast of  Vineyard Sound at periscope depth, Admiral Kim observes President Obama's arrival on the Vineyard and later practicing his golf swing at the presidential retreat before hitting the links. Kim was heard to giggle "He swing club like girl 6 year old"




Periscope reconnaissance photo of First Lady Michelle Obama 
as she leisurely wades in the surf of Martha's Vineyard beach




Periscope reconnaissance photo of who the DPRK Naval Intelligence
believes to be Barack Obama. Debate rages in the North Korean
intelligence community as to whether this is really the President,
or just some goofy looking skinny black guy with no balls wandering
around the golf course near the Presidential retreat


Stay Tuned to Middle Finger News for any developments 
on the latest taxpayer funded Obama Vacation.

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Thursday, February 4, 2021

That Time John Kerry Had His Fill of DMF/Middle Finger News Service and His Cheese Slipped Off His Cracker

Since Joe Biden has chosen to grace us again with the always effervescent public presence of one of our favorite kickballs, none other than the Earl of Ketchup, John Kerry, we decided to open the dank archives of DMF and drag out into the light some of our favorite John F. Kerry post from the long ago Barky Obama years. Good Times. Good Times.
 


MFNS - Secretary of State John F. Kerry (he fought in Vietnam you know) has called out 'Middle Finger News Service' as a pitiful Unamerican / Uncosmopolitan “satire” outlet and threatened humanitarian annihilation, if we do not shape up.

Below is a partial transcript of his remarks at the "Societe De Douchebag Internationale" convention yesterday, and I promise you, sh*t  getting real.....

"The illegitimate 'Middle Finger News' editorial regime and its vicious hack collaborators, for too long, have defied the wrath of the International Community.   These despicable hooligans truly are “Sinners in the Hand of an Angry Military-Industrial Complex,” and its about time they started to show accountably for their venomous use of free speech and abuse of the people's Internet. 
Their crimes against breadsticks are simply intolerable. It is over 72 hours since either a new post or even a meager, petty, individual comment on MFNS has mentioned the Olive Garden fiasco. How much longer does Our Common Humanity have to wait?"
Furthermore..... 
"I know not with what weapons President Assad has fought with, because we haven't had a chance to think about this one yet. But what I do know is that our war of eternally compassionate and brutally sympathetic attrition with the bitter, hard-boiled Middle Finger News dogmatists and ideological fanatics will be fought with… um, Syrian cooking pots.”
"You know who said that? Yes, that’s right.
No, not Assad, he’s kind of our second-best frenemy right now. I mean, it's getting to the point where he needs us more than we need him. Unacceptable. But kinda acceptable too.  Or is it?
No, not that Indian guy. No, not Einstein either. Someone a bit closer to home. A great man of peace.  I Thought it was pretty obvious who is the Great Emancipator and Man of Eternal Pacific Justice in our time.
Anyway… I've told you what's what, and who our enemies are for the time being…Until we decide (or at least do not decide) otherwise, in light of the purely value free and objective given constraints and opportunities. 
You know, I really hate these guys. Just ‘cos.  Well, that's enough, right?  Well, maybe.
Still, the other side of this dilemma, which is equally important, and of equal strategic importance to us all, is that Middle Finger News Service is an eternally radiant beacon of Voltairean irony and satire, carrying the eternal flame of Paine and Jefferson across all the boundless, blooming spaces of the information superhighway…...the sole and sufficient hope in which all meager, starved, and sore thirst seekers of satire may put their trust; and ever abide in the tender bowels of humor, the greatest gift among gods and people.
No, shut up!
No, don’t worry, that was technically a malapropism, not a flip-flop as such. Well, I guess it depends on how you look at it.  Nope! Sorry! You're not having that one. No woolly compromises. 
This time. No, no, no! This time, it's gotta be one or the other."
__________________________________________________

And then it got weird.

I was… let’s say, I was in agreement with half of what Kerry said.
Well?  
Work it out for yourself.

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Sunday, January 31, 2021

Is Biden Just Throwing Darts at a Wall of Post-it Notes with Names on Them??


I think we all are scratching our heads at Biden's sometime questionable picks for appointments to high level positions, even dragging out losers like The Earl of Ketchup, John Kerry, and a lunatic like Jennifer Granholm, who spent most of her appearances on cable news pre-election coverage calling everyone nazis, along with people with little or no level of expertise in their positions of authority they find themselves appointed to. I really didn't think things could get anymore weirder than Mayor Buttcheeks at Transportation, who I think Biden just didn't understand what the Mayor really meant when he said he liked trains.

But after reading this: 'Joe Biden Takes Failing Up to an Unprecedented Level', I'm starting to get the feeling Joe may be throwing darts at a wall of post-it notes with names written on them.
"When I found out some weeks back that Andy Slavitt was being brought in by Joe Biden to be a top COVID advisor, all I could do was chuckle. This was a guy who has been consistently wrong for the entirety of the pandemic, including projecting over one million deaths. His Twitter feed presents itself as the ravings of lunatic, and his proclamations on things like lock downs and mask usage have been shown to be evidence free garbage. 
Yet, Slavitt might not be the worst example of failing up in the Biden administration. There’s a new contender, and she’s taking things to an unprecedented level. It’s truly the worst of Washington on display."
And that bring us to one Suzi Levine:
"Suzi Levine, who lost $600 million to Nigerian scam artists then helped block an audit of her department, will now lead the federal office that helps states manage jobless benefits. The fact that this woman spells her name with a “z” should have been a clue something was off, but I digress. Suzan Levine has announced her elevation to the Biden administration from serving as Washington state’s Commissioner of Employment Security Department. 
As head of the ESD, her job was ostensibly to protect her state from fraud involving things like benefit payments. Instead, she lost $600 million to Nigerian scam artists. No, I’m not joking. That’s really a thing that happened. 
After that was revealed, Levine attempted to cover her own backside by refusing an audit to figure out what the heck happened. Her agency has been embattled and under investigation ever since. She also oversaw long delays during the pandemic in getting people benefits. Now, here comes the kicker. Levine and her husband gave $400,000 toward Biden’s election effort during the 2020 cycle. 
For her troubles, she’s going from losing hundreds of millions of dollars with her incompetence to doing the same job at the federal level. Brilliant, right?....."
The swamp is alive and well, and Joe Biden is shoveling more and more garbage into it. Where are the outraged media reports about him appointing people with such obvious records of failure? I think we all know the answer to that by now.

Tuesday, January 5, 2021

Squinty & Meat Puppet Do Journalism 🙃 Call Out Democrat Hypocrisy on Election Challenges

On today's edition of  'Morning with Squinty & Meat Puppet',  Mika B. surely rattled a few cages by called out Democrats for their hypocrisy in criticizing the Republicans for challenging the election results. After noting that congressional Democrats have objected to electoral votes the last three times a Republican has been elected President, Mika B. focused on the 2004 election, in which George W. Bush defeated John Kerry.

Noting that then-Senator Barbara Boxer objected to Bush's electoral votes from Ohio, Mika cited, chapter and verse, statements at the time from fellow Democrats Dick Durbin, Chris Van Hollen, and Ed Markey praising Boxer's move. Mika contrasted that with the statements the same three Democrats have put out in recent days, condemning the current Republican challenges. 

It should also be noted that then Senators Barky Obama and Hillary Clinton also objected to the 2004 election results. But no one remembers them being called "Seditious" or "Treasonous".

[NewsBusters]

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Friday, August 7, 2020

It'a A Big Week for Two of Our Favorite Bitter and Disgraced

What a day to wake up to find two of our favorite kickballs of the past here at DMF making news. I speak of none other than The Earl of Ketchup and the Loveable Nicaragua Piglet herself.

Ana Navarro, the former Republican strategist, current Anti-Trump CNN contributor and part-time banshee on the toxic hatefest sideshow 'The View',  who's acrimony and bitterness are legendary has joined the Biden 2020 Basement campaign.

Navarro's family fled the Sandinista communist revolution and settled in Miami. But the TDS is so strong here that the woman who claims she became a Republican at the age of 8 because it was a party that was fighting communism has now gone to work for a candidate, who if elected, would essentially be influenced and handled by Justice Democrats communist advisors already embedded in the campaign. She's been hired mainly to do outreach to the Latino community and repeat with a spanish accent the lie DJT called all Mexicans rapists and criminals, which he didn't say. 

Her bitterness and unprofessionalism will surely be on full display the next 90 days in spades (are we still allowed to say that?). And anyone who is familiar with this fat and obnoxious little ray of sunshine has no real doubts why she was 48 years old before she finally found someone willing to marry her.

In other news, we find that last week end, the failed former presidential candidate and US State Dept. Iranian buttboy, none other than the Duke of Heinz / Earl of Ketchup himself, John F. Kerry, finally accomplishes something of importance.

Secretary of State Kerry About to Earn Fourth Purple Heart for Trauma Suffered to his
 Genitals During a Break in Iranian Nuclear Treaty Negotiations in Switzerland 

The disgraced, accident prone 
kisser of Mullha ass, valiantly captained a 45 foot yacht to a first-place finish in the Edgartown Yacht Club’s Round the Island race last Weekend.  Kerry completed the 54.7 nautical-mile race around Martha's Vineyard in 8 hours, 52 minutes, and 7 seconds, more than 6 minutes faster than the wussy loser second-place finisher.

Kerry reported encountering some difficulties near Mutton Shoal off of Wasque, but drawing on his extensive wartime experience as a heroic swift boat commander dodging the enemy, rallied his crew "who caught a little bit of air and played it further to the east and we stayed out of trouble." What a Guy!

It is possible that Kerry's former boss, Barky Obama, was on hand to celebrate the most impressive achievement of Kerry's career outside of marrying a billionaire with the personality of a fish.  Barky and Big Mike purchased a 30-acre estate on Edgartown Great Pond last year for nearly $15 million after signing a lucrative Netflix contract to produce documentaries about income inequality.

Tuesday, November 12, 2019

Looks like the Democratic Establishment Have Been Googling 'Joe Biden'.


There is so many Democrats running for the nomination it's hard to notice when they drop out. It's like raking leaves. They seem to just keep falling out of the trees. Even that crazy woman from the hamlet of Chappaqua NY claims "she is being urged by many, many, many people to run in 2020."  But for now, Joe Biden is the perceived front-runner, and that excites no one, not even his wife. He is the non-threatening choice, known to us on the right as Obama's Court Jester. And according to an article in the New York Times, the "movers and shakers" in the Democrat party are having second thoughts about Uncle Joe.

"Since the last debate, just anecdotally, I've had five or six people ask me: 'Is there anybody else?'" said Leah Daughtry, a longtime Democrat who has run two of the party's recent conventions."
The "anxious" Democratic establishment reportedly think Lizzy Warren isn't "viable" in a general election because she comes off as a crazy commie college professor. They're probably also more afraid of Bernie winning than losing. It bothers them that Mayor Pete is leading in Iowa, and that the dem's plantation black voters aren't high on voting for a little white fudgepacker, especially one from a mostly white state in the midwest. They've found Biden's debate performances "lackluster" and they haven't even seen his latest town hall. 

Former Senator and Secretary of State John Kerry (he fought in Vietnam you know) has "wondered aloud" if he should've run again. He must've "wondered aloud" in an empty room because if he'd "wondered" this within earshot of anyone alive in 2004, he would've heard a reflexive "hell no."

Eric Holder, the former attorney general, was apparently considering a "last-minute" entry but he admits it's too late now. He's right. There's never a good time for this crooked bastard's presidential campaign. He should be in prison. 

There was talk yesterday of Deval Patrick, the long forgotten former Massachusetts governor, entering the race. He's another answer to a question no one's asked. Spartacus Booker doesn't need an understudy for the role of unqualified, bald brother who loves them some Wall Street money. And someone for some reason known only to them convinced Michael Bloomberg to run for president. He's likely going to spend a lot of money to lose like a common Julio Castro. Unless public humiliation is his jam, he might find it cheaper to just pay Warren's wealth tax and go play golf. 

Obama's boy David Axelrod explained the party's current dilemma:
"With Trump looming, there is genuine concern that the horse many have bet on may be pulling up lame and the horse who has sprinted out front may not be able to win." 
Wait... did Axlrod just call Sen. Lizzy a horse?? Oh My.

The "safe" candidate is not always the best. But the establishment has already taken their chosen candidate out of his original packaging. They can't return him now. Pass the popcorn.......

~ Thank You Liz@RightNation and 
Larwyn's Linx@ Doug Ross Journal for the Linkage ~

Tuesday, April 30, 2019

Pray Tell Joe. Which Is It? BullS**t Biden or Gaslight Joe?

Former Two Term Assassination Insurance Policy for Barack Obama, Joseph Robinette Biden Jr.

We’ve all had the word burned into our minds almost since the day Donald Trump announced his run for President. “Collusion.” It was the grease for the most egregious example of fake news of our time. And we've all heard the word "gaslighting", a tactic of people who try to control others through manipulation, often accusing others of behaviors that they are engaged in themselves.


And while DJT never ‘colluded’ with Russia or anyone other than hard working Americans, it looks as if it's Joe Biden running smack into hard, admitted collusion with foreign leaders. But he’s keeping WHO a secret.


Consider Biden’s recent boast, as reported in Politico, that "I get calls from people all over the world — world leaders are calling me — and they’re almost begging me to do this, to save the country, save the world." Level with us 'Lunchbucket Joe', Who are they? What foreigners are attempting to influence our election and direction of our policy? Umm Joe.

What foreign leaders don’t like a tougher America on trade, and against terrorism and against our avowed enemies? Who was it Joe, Sounds like maybe Russia? China? Iran? North Korea? ISIS? Any of these, Joe? These are the countries and terror groups who most want to reverse course to the Obama 'easy on our enemies' policies. Who wants America to again be weak? To again ignore terror organizations? To again ignore nuclear weapons and ICBM development in rogue states? To finally eliminate America’s borders? To betray our enemies and befriend our sworn enemies? To offer encouragement and a blind eye to gangs and state actors who smuggle into America all the drugs, weapons and terrorists they can? Who’s colluding, Joe?

This, after John Kerry met with Iranian dictators, advising them to ‘wait out’ President Trump at which time their worldwide reign of terror and nuclear weapons could resume at warp speed. Joe, are you colluding with the likes of a John Kerry and the butchers in Tehran? With Hillary and her friends in Russia?

Pray Tell Joe, who are these world leaders that begged you to run for president.

It seems that Biden, not silent in the relentless and fake-news attacks on the president of the United States, is not silent in his crying wolf that Trump, not himself is the colluder, and fits the definition of “accusing you of behaviors that they are engaged in themselves."

"Lunchbucket Joe?" Or maybe "Colluding Joe" or "Gaslight Joe." Take your pick.


~ Thank You MJA@IOTWReport for the Linkage ~

Saturday, December 29, 2018

John Kerry Believes In Border Wall Security - As Long As It Pertains To His Family's Palatial French Villa

 Earl of Ketchup - Duke of Heinz

Following the law is for the little people. Walls and enforcing secure borders is only for rich elites. That seems to be the conclusion as the family of John Kerry continues to fight rules about land access around the family's Palatial French Villa, while demanding that migrants, hikers and the great unwashed be kept away from their multi-million dollar property.

The former senator, presidential candidate, and least effective U.S. Secretary of State of the past 50 years, spends a significant amount of time at his family’s ancestral home in Saint-Briac-sur-Mer, (away from the crazy Heinz Ketchup Lady) along a pristine stretch of France's Brittany coast, where unicorns are born. Kerry's grandfather James Forbes bought the Essarts castle in Saint-Briac in 1928 and it has remained in the family since, being rebuilt as a villa after it was confiscated and later destroyed during World War II. Hikers demanding right of way along the pristine stretch of coast are locked in a legal war with the coastal villa owners in a posh resort town. Under French law the country’s coastlines must be accessible to all, similarly to Britain's "right to roam" rules.

But for decades Saint-Briac leaders have steadfastly refused to obey via a series of legal moves, in particular Brice Lalonde — Kerry’s first cousin. Now, the family of the liberal icon is doing everything they can to keep those pesky commoners and dirty migrants from stepping foot near their villa. The proposed path will "impact the well-being of residents by knocking down their walls and ruining their privacy," Lalonde told AFP in a statement. 

Kerry’s extended family is said to be worried about the “terrorist risks” of allowing common people onto the beach as French law requires, and fretted that “it will be fairly easy to target members of my family who are politically active. The same open-borders liberals declare that building walls to prevent illegal entry is racist — and don’t even think about suggesting that unrestricted migration or open access could be exploited by terrorists. But if you’re a powerful former senator or his wealthy family, none of that applies. Suddenly, walls are amazing and keeping people from walking near your property. That they could be terrorists is suddenly hugely important.

The hypocrisy and double-standards are just too much. One set of rules for thee, and one set for me. Liberal elitism has once again been exposed as a power-consolidating sham.

(Western Journal - CT)
(Agence France-Presse)

~Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS and 
MJA@IOTWReport for the Linkage~

Monday, September 3, 2018

John Kerry Doesn't Rule Out Joining the Dem's 2020 Circus

John Heinz-Kerry Tearfully Accepting the King’s Crown from The International Douchebag Society - 2014

In an interview Sunday with CBS Face The Nation Hostess, the lovely Margaret Brennan, the venerable Duke of Heinz -Earl of Ketchup - former Secretary of State John F. Kerry, refused to rule out a run for the White House in 2020, saying "talking about it now is just a distraction." In political speak he means if Dems can't win in the midterms, who'd want to be active in a party of a bunch of pathetic out-of-touch losers. Best known as husband of Teresa Heinz Kerry, the former senator and failed presidential candidate writes in his new book about John F. Kerry that "our nation is stronger when citizens stand up and decide that the way things are isn't the way things have to be." Like most democrats with acute TDS, he too fails to understand THAT'S WHAT THE LAST ELECTION WAS ALL ABOUT!

A multiple Purple Heart recipient now in private life where no one pays him any attention but his dogs, John F. Kerry laments on regrets about his miserable 2004 failed bid for the White House, including the choice of the lying lecherous pretty boy John Edwards as his running mate. John F. Kerry now sips chardonnay as he watches most of his political legacy, mainly the fraud of an Iran nuclear deal, the ridiculous climate change accord as well as the crown jewel of his foreign policy efforts, the Non-Aggression Pact with Canada, all being regulated to the dumpster of historical blunders by DJT.

And seeing John F. Kerry decided to use his high position to stir up some shit by personal calling out DMF's News Division 'Middle Finger News Service' at an International Awards Ceremony for our critical, but fair, coverage of his incompetent exploits as Barky's SOS, John F.Kerry made himself of one our favorite kick balls, giving us beaucoup amounts of material

But, in the name of healing the country and (to cultural appropriate a saying) bury the hatch so to speak, we at DMF/ MFNS wholeheartedly encourage John F. Kerry to seriously consider joining the Democrat Circus for 2020. You have so much to contribute. The Democrats need you Mr. Kerry.

(Sunday Morning) 
(The Musty Archive Vault of MFNS)
 
Thank You Whatfinger News & MJA @IOTWR for the Linkage!

Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Historic City to Change Name in Response to LGBTQ Protest


Middle Finger News Exclusive
D.F. Krause Reporting

Detroit Bends Over to Gay Protest of Homophobic City Name  

I guess this was inevitable. It was only a matter of time before the LGBTQYXZ social justice warriors figured out that Detroit was French for “of the straits,” and even though “strait” in no way means the same thing as “straight,” who cares? Things that come alive on the Twitter make as much sense as an episode of Will & Grace, and don’t ask me to explain any of those. It’s 2018 and SJWs get results quickly:


The City Council met in an emergency session just hours after Mayor Duggan’s apologetic tweet, and voted unanimously to change the city’s name to 'D’efféminé.

Everything changes now. Well, not the Lions sucking at football. But most everything. D’efféminé will still make cars, but no more of those gas-guzzling pickups. We’ve done enough feeding of all that machismo in Warren. Suburban Ferndale is concerned about losing its residents, but that’s a topic for another day.
Vive l’apostrophé!

At least it still starts with a D. The locals won’t have to get rid of those weird English letters on their hats. But now that they have to get used to D’efféminé, Michigan. I wonder if they don’t need to update their headwear to reflect the more properly sensitive.... sensibilities with which the letter represents the city.

There were a few people who objected to the change. They called themselves "Don’t Take Our Troit", or DTOT for short.

They argued that: a) “of the straits” has nothing to do with heterosexuality, and isn’t even spelled the same; b) this is really, really stupid; and c) all those Canadians across the river are laughing their little dandy canuk asses off. The group spoke to WXYZ-TV to express its objections. The response to DTOT came swiftly in the form of a joint statement from General Motors, Ford, Chrysler, Blue Cross Blue Shield, the UAW and Mitch Albom. It said:
“We denounce in the strongest terms the bigotry and hatred of DTOT, which we can’t help but note could also stand for 'Donald Trump Our Thicky'. 
The D’efféminé community must come together and oppose all forms of hatred and intolerance, and if that requires members of DTOT to be thrown from the Ambassador Bridge, tolerance must be protected at all costs.”
On Friday night, the D’efféminé Tigers will host the Cleveland Indigenous Peoples for the first of a three-game series. We could not confirm at press time that Kid Rock will be sitting alongside Chief Wahoo at the game, but things happen quickly in D’efféminé, Michigan.
____________________________________

* Middle Finger News Service is a registered subsidiary of Diogenes' Middle Finger Inc. Ltd. RCC, RSVP, POD. Not to be confused with uppity, poorly done imitation fake news purveyors like CNN and MSNBC.  Middle Finger News brings you only the best and most honest REAL Fake News. We Stay Over The Target.  Accept No Imitations.  "Unamerican and Uncosmopolitan, Despicable Hooligans"....... John Kerry

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

John Kerry Proves He's Still Inept at That Foreign Policy Stuff


Liberals are in hysterics and wetting themselves because the President went to Europe and talked tough to European allies and actually had the audacity to question why they don't pay their fair share in defending the continent from Russian aggression. And just like every other times Trump has done something they deem unusual or dangerous, he gets results and liberals are left looking embarrassingly for the next shiny object. As a result of Trump's straightforward tough talk, the NATO nations have agreed to increase their military spending and no one was harder hit than former Secretary of State John Kerry--The Earl of Ketchup/Duke of Heinz--who ceremoniously defined the role of top US diplomat with historic ineptitude and incompetence
"NATO leaders pledged their “unwavering commitment” to boost defense spending on Wednesday, following stern words from President Trump criticizing European leaders for spending too little. The U.S. and European allies signed a declaration stating they are “committed to improving the balance of sharing the costs and responsibilities of alliance membership.” The declaration comes after confrontational and testy discussions between Trump and other NATO leaders."
So Trump dresses down NATO about lack of military spending and they respond by increasing military spending. It seems so simple. Why couldn’t Kerry or Obama do this? I guess I answered my own question. Kerry and Obama.

Kerry posted a statement on the tweeter saying that Trump was “disgraceful and destructive” and called his statement “counter productive.” He also claimed that Trump had undermined the Obama administration’s efforts to get NATO to increase their military spending. I wonder if the news has reached him Trump actually got NATO to do this while he and Barky had failed so miserably.

Kerry implied Trump was stupid, which is funny coming from a guy who paid Iran pallets of cash to continue their nuclear weapons program. Kerry then tried to make it seem like he was tougher on Russia than Trump is. Yeah, same guy who sat around sipping Chardonnay with other useless diplomats as Russia annexed a large portion of the Ukraine. And all this coming from the Secretary of State who summed up the Clinton/Kerry foreign policy years; 'Nothing Says World Peace Like a Box of Potatoes'.

Obviously John Kerry is confused by foreign policy success. This is something he has never experienced before and it is frightening to him. It also probably doesn’t help that Trump’s winning makes Kerry look even more like a blathering idiot.

[La Libre Belgique]                                
[FOX News] 
Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage!

Sunday, May 6, 2018

When Democrats Do It, It's Called Opposition Research


An article in the British leftist rag 'The Guardian' titled 'Revealed: Trump Team Hired Spy Firm for ‘Dirty Ops’ on Iran Arms Deal', a story supposedly authored through the Guardian's online mouth piece 'The Observer', makes the claim aides to Donald Trump hired an Israeli private intelligence agency to orchestrate a “dirty ops” campaign against key individuals from the Obama administration who helped negotiate the Iran Nuclear Deal. The piece goes on to say that according to "incendiary documents" shown the Observer by unnamed sources, of course, revealed investigators contracted by the private intelligence agency were told to dig into the personal lives and political careers of Obama's former deputy national security adviser Ben Rhodes and Colin Kahl, a national security adviser to the former VP Joe Biden.

After quotes from pompous British diplomats railing about how "bloody outrageous" such activity is, the author of the piece tells us of the oh-so nefarious inquirers:
"Among things they were looking at were personal relationships, any involvement with Iran-friendly lobbyists, and if they had benefited personally or politically from the peace deal. Investigators were also apparently told to contact prominent Iranian Americans as well as pro-deal journalists – from the New York Times, MSNBC television, the Atlantic, Vox website and Haaretz, the Israeli newspaper among others – who had frequent contact with Rhodes and Kahl in an attempt to establish whether they had violated any protocols by sharing sensitive intelligence. 
They are believed to have looked at comments made by Rhodes in which he admitted relying on "inexperienced reporters to create an “echo chamber” that helped sway public opinion" to secure the deal...." 
The report go on to say it is not clear how much work was actually undertaken, for how long or what became of any material, if any at all was unearthed.  And whether it appears unseemly or not, in today's world it's pretty tame stuff. It's call gathering information or as the democrats call such  things, like the  Steele Dossier, "Opposition Research".

With all that is come to light about the secretive and underhanded actions of Barky O's administration, coupled with the revelation that for the second time in two months John Kerry met with Iranian foreign minister Mohammad Javad Zarif Khonsari to apparently strategise against the US government, makes this story if true, probably a necessary step in counter-intelligence. Or, it could just be another exaggerated deep state smear story planted with a foreign anti-Trump/anti- Israeli media source known for getting their limey pantaloons in a twist over most everything DJT.

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Tim Kaine: Uh Yeah, so maybe Obama and Kerry didn’t get all those Syrian chemical weapons after all


In case you’ve forgotten, and heaven knows I certainly have tried to, Tim Kaine is the Senator from  Virginia who had the political misfortune of attaching his rising star to Madam Clinton’s epic presidential catastrophe. He was selected as Clinton’s 2016 running mate because like millions upon millions of other Americans, he speaks Spanish. This little bit of transparent pandering was supposed to deliver the Hispanic vote, allowing Hillary to win without evil white males, who she felt were deplorable bitter clingers and totally unnecessary to her victory. If that strategy seems crazy to you, congratulations, you have better judgement that Tim Kaine, who speaks Spanish.

Anyway, MSNBC pulled Timmy out of the political dark shadows of the U.S. Senate this morning and asked him: Hey, didn’t Obama and Kerry say they’d eliminated all of Syria’s chemical weapons? Tim Kaine, who boldly chose to answer in English despite being a fluent Spanish-speaker, responded honestly. Yeah…..about that…. 



Whoops! Apparently, from 2013-2017, when Obama’s surrogates were telling every news show on the planet that they’d eliminated Assad’s stockpile and the lapdogs of the media were praising the “amazing” and “potentially groundbreaking” 2013 deal in which John Kerry(he fought in Vietnam you know)and Barky Obama entrusted Russian forces with the disposal of Assad’s chemical weapons arsenal, they weren’t quite telling the truth.

Someone should alert Politifact to this shocking turn of events, since they rated Kerry’s claims “mostly true.” I guess we now know that we can chalk-up the following video is yet another collection of the previous administration’s major league flim-flammery, hokum and other folksy homespun words for “blatant lies.”



Thank You MJA for the Linkage!

Friday, August 11, 2017

Reason #9 to Encourage California to Secede

Encourage California Secession. 
Help Rid Race Obsessed Leftist Morons like This From Congress

Another DMF Profile in Moonbattery:

Another illustrious member of the California US Congressional delegation and member of the Congressional Caucus of the Race Obsessed, launched a bigoted attack against the President in front of the annual liberal Nut-fest gathering known the Netroots Nation's convention in Atlanta. This time it was California Democrat Barbara Lee telling the audience "Trump wasted no time in implementing the hateful agenda that he ran on.  It's an all out assault on our fundamental civil and human rights" 


Lee, like her fellow CBC members Elijah Cummings, John Lewis, Maxine Waters, Kamala Harris, John Conyers and Keith Ellison (who's little segregated club are provided its own offices, staff and lavish budget at taxpayer expense) are allowed to shield their bigotry with their skin color as they spew their lies and sometime blatant anti-white propaganda in the Media. This is also the same Barbara Lee who tried to nullify the 2004 election of George Bush by voting not to count Ohio's Electoral Votes, thus swing the election to John Kerry. 
"President Trump, she told the audience, has “wasted no time in implementing the hateful agenda that he ran on.” Lee pointed to the so-called Muslim ban, transgender military ban, healthcare reform efforts, and Commission on Election Integrity among other recent Republican actions to illustrate her argument. 
“Coming from the Bay Area, of course, as a community leader with the Black Panther Party, I just have to say progressives understand the power of the people. We must be bold and not back down ” - Washington Examiner
She is also the same nutcase who recently suggested that the appointment of former USMC General John Kelly as Trump’s new White House chief of staff was the equivalent of an extremist military junta taking over the country. 

Sane people don’t listen to race-baiting crackpots like this woman. Unfortunately,  California seems to continue to elect more then their share of these bigoted wackos that help disrupt getting anything good done for the country because they act as if gone  from the first black president back to the 1960's overnight.  And people like Barbara Lee seem to ignore things like THIS.

Trump signed the Historically Black Colleges and Universities HBCU Executive Order,
Tuesday, Feb. 28, 2017