Monday, October 7, 2013

If You Think The Beltway Media Is Bad Now, Just Wait Until This Crowd Gets In…

CNN’s Frank Sesno apparently has one of those Bob Mann-style academic gigs these days, in which an old leftist media type gets a cushy gig at a college teaching new leftists how to spin biased narratives to the public. In Sesno’s case his cush gig is at George Washington University. And yesterday, Sesno displayed the product of his current work by trotting out a gaggle of J-school clowns from GWU to ask them (1) where they get their news (hilariously enough, almost none said CNN) and (2) what they think the media’s role should be. The results?

Let’s pray this isn’t representative of the majority of what comes out of America’s journalism schools, though we all know most of them turn out much worse product than Sesno does.  The fruitcake in the green shirt is the classic example of the “everybody gets a trophy in my soccer league” entitled milennial leftist – Ted Cruz disagrees with Me, Therefore I will Deny Access To The Media for Ted Cruz. Because those who disagree with Me are not fit to breathe My Air. And that fool will likely have a position of authority in a newsroom at some point.  

via The Hayride 

Good Monday Morning

Saturday, October 5, 2013

DMF Volunteers Services to Update White House Social Sites

Due to the government shutdown, the White House social sites are not being updated. The geniuses at the White House either aren't smart enough to figure out how to post, or they don't realize they are free and cost the gov't nothing to run.  Not to worry.

DMF has taken on the task of updating our favorite site for them, the White House Tumblr.  We're sending it on to the White House hoping they'll appreciate the time and expense spent doing it and let us post it up for them, and maybe drop the IRS audit this year. Here's the rough draft of our post......

The Official White House Tumblr

Things going around the White House that we just had to share with you.

This Weeks Obama Supporter Spotlight

 Meet Jerome Mohammad Katz , 26 of Chicago. Jerome is an avid supporter of the the president and his policies and was a valued member of the reelection team, working as a poll monitor in 2012.  Jerome is  a self-employed pharmaceutical rep and spends his spare time community organizing and volunteering with his neighborhood watch patrol. As soon as the gov't shutdown is over and Republicans fund the gov't agencies, Jerome plans to attend Stanford University and become an astronaut. Thank You and Good Luck, Jerome. 

Meet Ricardo Blankenship, 31 of Los Memos, Cal.  A Victim of the Bush recession, Ricardo is an unemployed school crossing guard  and came to our attention during a essay contest for third graders on the subject of ObamaCare. Ricardo will be happy to know he is just one of millions of Americans who get free health care covered under pre-existing conditions.  

Thank You Larwyn’s Linx at Doug Ross@Journal for the Linkage!

Friday, October 4, 2013

Woke up this morning to the sounds of whining coming from the White House....

image via Blur Brain 
“President Obama has to cancel his trip to Asia because of the government shutdown.” And of course those mean ol’ Republicans are to blame. I suppose this rates right up there with FLOTUS not being able to ‘tweet’ as much. Could it be the impeccably technologically savvy Obama administration has never heard of Skype? Sorry Mr. President you have to stay here with us sappy Americans and not trek off to Bali or Indonesia. Quite sure the leaders of those countries would be happy to tele-conference with you. How about this, just repeal the medical device tax and ensure Obamacare is a law that applies to all Americans — no waivers, exemptions, and delays for some — and we promise you can go out and play, little fella." - Allen West

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Swedes Cash In on Government Shutdown

MFNS - In a brilliant marketing campaign based on the current U.S.Government shutdown and refusal of Barack Obama and his lapdogs in congress to negotiate with republicans, Swedish furniture giant IKEA yesterday announced its newest fall line of assemble-it-yourself furniture: the Obama "2013 Empty Chair Series".

Greatly satisfied by the wildly successful 2008 "Embrace the Change" campaign featuring cheap Oval-Office style home furniture, the iconic Scandinavian furniture retailer announced that its "Obama Empty Chairs" would further increase revenue by using Clint Eastwood’s metaphor at the 2012 Republican National Convention about the empty-suited “not present” Obama.

At a recession-proof price of only $19.99, Ikea shoppers have their choice of 3 basic Obama "Tom Stools" ("tom stool" translates to "empty chair" in Swedish). Stained in red, white and blue, the three stools have already garnered thousands of online orders from U.S. taxpayers and from zipcodes as far away as Gaza City, Ramallah, Cairo and Benghazi.

In interviews with several Ikea shoppers at a suburban mall outside of Washington, DC and in College Park, Maryland, MFNS learned that most shoppers were opting to purchase the upgraded version of the Obama Empty Chair – the “Ihalig Stool” – which is not due to be released until November 7 and costs $10 more. The Ihalig Stool (which translates to "Hollow, Cavernous or Shallow Chair") is intended to remain permanently unassembled and left in its box; there are no screws or any other accompanying hardware which might enable the buyer to actually assemble the upgraded empty chair. 

Antique furniture expert, Dora Lamore of Langston Virginia, told us the new line of chairs are destined to become an instant collector's piece as soon as Obama gets impeached.

Obama's America

h/t Straight Talk

Two Days Into Gov't Shutdown, Destitute Federal Workers Score Free Stuff

Despair not. Businesses in and around Washington DC are showing their solidarity by offering furloughed employees free or discounted food, drinks and activities to keep their spirits high during the shutdown. 
 From free cupcakes to $2 beer specials and free museum admissions to free pole-dancing classes, ABC News has compiled a list of some of the unexpected perks of being a "non-essential" government employee.
Here's just a small taste:  
 Government workers will not go hungry -- or without a sugar fix -- thanks to the largess of several area establishments.
Jose Andres Sandwiches Internationally renowned chef Jose Andres is offering free sandwiches every afternoon during the shutdown to government employees. Bring your government ID into one of his three DC eateries -- Zaytinya, Oyamel or Jaleo -- from 3 p.m. to 5 p.m. during the shutdown and receive a complimentary sandwich.
Z-Burger The burger chain is offering free burgers, with a valid government ID, to workers during peak lunch and dinner hours, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. and 5 p.m. to 7 p.m., at four of its DC-area locations: Arlington, Tenleytown, Southwest and Columbia Heights. This offer extends until the end of the government shutdown.
Pork Barrel BBQ Pork Barrel BBQ is also offering free food for the duration of the shutdown to all government employees -- well, every government employee except for members of Congress. The BBQ joint is serving up free pulled pork sandwiches all day, limit one per day, in Alexandria, Va. ....."
 Looking for a way to burn those calories from all the free shutdown food and drinks? Some local D.C. studios are offering free classes for furloughed workers.
Polerized Fitness Studio Polerized Fitness Studio, based outside of Old Town Alexandria, is offering a free pole-dancing class this week for furloughed employees with government ID. Don't work for the government and still want to learn a few new tricks? Free intro classes are offered for first-time clients.
Potomac Pilates Would you rather unwind? Potomac Pilates is offering two free classes to furloughed federal employees. Those looking to claim must create an account on and email with your government job title and department for verification purposes.

Read the Entire list of Perks for the Destitute Here

Great Britain Reclaims America

A Timely Re-post from July 2012

To the citizens of the United States of America
from Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II:

In light of your current failure to financially manage yourselves and also, in recent years, your tendency to elect incompetent Presidents and therefore not properly govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)

I, Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except New Jersey, which we do not wish to acquire.)

Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron (, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated sometime next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').
2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.
3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday,  enough of your foolish inebriation. 
4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.
5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a concealed vegetable peeler.
6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get over it.
8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with ketchup up but with vinegar.
9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as lager. New Zealand beer is also acceptable, as New Zealand is pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American beer will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.
10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.
11. You will cease playing American football. There are only two kinds of proper football; one you call soccer, and rugby (dominated by the New Zealanders). Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour).
12. Further, you will stop playing baseball and learn cricket.
13. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776)
14. Daily tea time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups and saucers, never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

Somewhat Respectfully,
Elizabeth II, Queen of All England 
God Save the Queen!