Your Official Soon to Be Semi World Famous Big Ass Turkey Day Open Thread.

And It was Proclaimed:

"It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and voice by the whole American people. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. 

And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquility and Union.

In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand, and caused the seal of the United States to be affixed.

Done at the city of Washington, this third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the independence of the United States the eighty-eighth." - Abraham Lincoln 

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Despite our present political atmosphere, as someone who spent most of their early life living in Europe, believe me when I say: We as Americans have much to be thankful for. 

Happy Thanksgiving from DMF.   

DOJ Moves to Cover up $737 million Taxpayer Funded Bird Fryer Scandal

Breitbart 

"Joe Biden’s Justice Department moved on election night to essentially ensure the cover-up of a potentially massive green energy scandal, Breitbart News has learned exclusively. 

On Nov. 5, at 5:20 p.m. ET, less than an hour before the first polls closed and when it had become clear from the exit polls that Democrat presidential candidate Vice President Kamala Harris was likely to lose, an attorney with the Justice Department emailed lawyers for plaintiffs in a qui tam lawsuit aimed at recouping significant losses the taxpayers allegedly incurred from a failed solar plant in Nevada. 

A qui tam lawsuit is when a private plaintiff sues on behalf of the U.S. Government to recoup taxpayer dollars — often alleging fraud, misuse, or theft of taxpayer dollars. The email from the DOJ stated what plaintiffs started hearing through the grapevine as the election neared and it became clear the Harris campaign was in trouble. 

The email said that the DOJ intended to dismiss a lawsuit that it had previously allowed to proceed, thereby undercutting the private push to recoup significant losses for American taxpayers. The plant went into bankruptcy in 2020 after years of failing to return any profit......."

[SNIP] 

But there were other problems with this 1 Billion dollar science project.

From the DMF Drank Archives of Feb 2015:

 

The Crescent Dunes Solar Energy Project array is nearly ready to go partially online in Nevada. The $737 Million publicly Department Of Energy funded project is intended to produce 110 MW of energy. 

There’s just one problem. 130 birds were literally set on fire in mid flight during a recent test run in the span of 2 hours.

“About two hours into the test, engineers and biologists on site started noticing “streamers” – trails of smoke and steam caused by birds flying directly into the field of solar radiation. What moisture was on them instantly vaporized, and some instantly burst into flames – at least, until they began to frantically flap away. An estimated 130 birds were injured or killed during the test.”

 

Shit, a sturdy chicken catapult and a mess of baked beans and potato salad and we got us a one hell of a 4th of July celebration party!

.....................................

"Everything was going smoothly until just before the election, a couple days out from Trump’s triumph over Harris, when CMB began hearing that the Biden Justice Department may reverse its support for the lawsuit. Notice of that reversal is what formally came in those Election Night emails from the DOJ official, followed by a filing the next day in court seeking the dismissal of the qui tam case. 

The timing begs questions regarding why the Biden Justice Department would — from all appearances — seek to cover this up before Donald Trump would win the Presidential Election and Republicans would control both houses in Congress...."

Read More 

Piers Morgan Calls for Mercy and 'The View' to Be Put Out of Its ‘Misery’

Piers Morgan sarcastically called for the Mean Girls for the post-menopausal set, 'The View', to be put out of its “misery” and canceled in a scathing column for The New York Post that saw him call out every one of its current co-hosts and deem the show a “pointless, irrelevant parody of itself.

Their nadir came the day after the election, when to their horror, the man they’ve spent years branding a vile, bigoted, racist fascist won absolutely everything: the popular vote, the Electoral College, the White House, the Senate and the House of Representatives. In a truly farcical gesture of brazen bias, the six hosts all trotted out in funereal black clothing because they were in mourning. Every day is like that for them — a relentless assault on their eardrums from a bunch of partisan obsessives competing with each other over who detests Trump most.  

“In my worst nightmares, I find myself trapped on a desert island with the hosts of ‘The View.’ And all day long, I'm subjected to them all snarling, whining, scowling, seething and cursing about the same thing: Donald Trump,” began Morgan before enumerating his fears in more detail:

Joy Behar marches up and down the beach loudly mocking and reviling Trump as a lying, racist hypocrite. 

Whoopi Goldberg, who was suspended for saying the Holocaust wasn’t about race, sits by the ocean howling that Trump is a deluded, ill-informed, race-baiting imbecile.  

Ana Navarro, who said Trump was not elected legitimately in 2016 and spews constant bile-fueled abuse about him, resides under a palm tree, ranting that he’s a lying election denier who deploys ugly rhetoric. 

Alyssa Farah Griffin, who was once paid $183,000 to be Trump’s communications aide at the White House and enthusiastically sold him to America as a brilliant president, paces around seething that he’s the worst president of all time. 

Sunny Hostin — who cruelly and heartlessly accused Nikki Haley of crying fake tears over her husband’s deployment to war zones and called her a “hypocrite chameleon” for not using her real first name, Nimrata, despite Hostin not using her own first name, Asunción — wails to the lizards that Trump is a cruel, heartless, hypocritical charlatan. 

And Sara Haines, the saintly voice of compassionate, unifying sunshine who disapproves of Trump’s trash-talking but repeatedly called him a “jerk” and “jerkoff” in one episode, stands in the shade shouting, “HE’S STILL A JERK!” 

Meanwhile, I just lie face-down in the sand, feeling like Bill Murray in a never-ending, hellish “Groundhog Day.” Fortunately, I get to wake up from these horrific nightmares.But those who watch “The View” aren’t so lucky.

 I don’t like cancel culture — but given that the hosts of ‘The View’ have, by their own admission, worked so hard to cancel Donald Trump, it’s time they were canceled concluded Morgan.

A Good Monday Morning

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

~ No Tuxedos Required ~

 

When You Realize You Used the Wrong Type of Mushrooms on Your Lunch Salad......

  ....the elevator door opens and you find it full of your morning

breakfast Froot Loops staring back at you.

CHECK THIS OUT. 

Dem's Long Struggle Appealing to Normal People

While looking for an image as I scrolled the back pages of DMF, I found this post from just after the 2016 election that reminded me just what a train wreck the democrat party became internally after DJTJ robbed them of their Fever Dream of a Ma Clinton Presidency and their own unbridled power. 

Here's the reheated post from October 2017......

Liberals Try To Connect With Normal Americans. It Goes Poorly

Democrat Leadership Report on Why the Voting Public are Stupid

 Key Democrats met secretly to confer about the party’s future as America approached the one-year anniversary of their stunning and hilarious humiliation by Donald Trump. The key question they sought to answer: “How can we Democrats appeal to those Jesus-loving, racist idiots who hate science and don’t live on the coast like everyone we know?”
Sen Chuck Schumer opened the discussion: 

"We’re here to freely exchange ideas in an atmosphere of openness and unlimited inquiry. With that in mind, your program has a list of the things you can’t say, like ‘illegal alien’ and ‘Christmas.’ It also has a handy cheat sheet of everyone’s preferred pronouns. Mine are ‘he’ and ‘him,’ while Senator Menendez’s are ‘convict’ and ‘Number 675973.’ Also, be sure to observe the rule about not mansplaining, which should not be a problem with this group.”

He then turned it over to 105 year-old Nancy Pelosi, who asked, “Where am I?” After Schumer whispered in her ear, she began:

 “With the economy booming, the stock market setting records, and America defeating ISIS, things have never been worse. That’s why we need to keep The Resistance going, because it’s been a huge success so far in my district in San Francisco and, I’m sure, in your districts in Manhattan, Chicago, and Havana. And we need to expand our party, which means we need to convince dirty, stupid, transphobic normal Americans to come to grips with their own failings and join us.”

“We could tell them they’re stupid even more often,” suggested Al Franken.

“And racist,” suggested Maxine Waters.

“Also, Islamophobic,” said Keith Ellison.

“In my state, I can go potty with girls!” said California’s Gavin Newsom. 

“Clearly, there’s something wrong with these people, so we need to consult with someone with a genuine connection with normal Americans. Sadly, Hillary Clinton isn’t here to help us. If anyone connects with Middle America, it’s her. Unfortunately, she’s fallen and she can’t get up.”

Pelosi then made the “drinky drinky” gesture, and the crowd nodded. 

 “Now look,” Schumer said, frustrated. “We have to defend 22 Senate seats next year, many in red states. How the hell are we going to do that?” 

“Move left,” said Bernie Sanders. 

“I know!” came a shrill, grating voice from the back of the room. Hillary Clinton entered with a bandage around her head and limping from the broken toe she got when she “slipped” while wearing her trademark high heels. She took the mic and the room fell still.

“We can start treating normal Americans with respect. We can honor them for their hard work, patriotism, and devotion to family. We can stop insulting their religious beliefs and trying to shove our urban blue state values down their throats. When criminals murder fellow citizens, we can choose not to blame law-abiding gun owners, and instead of calling them ‘racists’ for voting for Trump, talk to them and learn why they felt he was offering them more than the Democratic Party.”

The room was silent, and the crowd sat staring with jaws slack. 

“And…and…,” she said, then steadied herself on the podium, looking around confused.  

“Are you all right, Madame Should-Be-President?” asked Schumer, handing her a goblet of Chardonnay. She drank it in one gulp. “I don’t understand…what happened?” she asked. 

 “You were just mumbling random words, crazy talk,” Schumer said. “It didn’t make any sense at all.”