Showing posts with label Satire??. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Satire??. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 12, 2019

This New Green Deal Thingy Is Gonna Be So Cool.

Unwilling To 

Secure Your Spot Today!
As per the goals outlined in the Green New Deal, every American will be provided with
"economic security for all who are unable or unwilling to work".
Questions have been asked about the process by which Americans can declare themselves
unwilling to work and sign up for free economic security.
Fortunately, we think it should be as simple as declaring yourself as one of The Unwilling and 
then filling out the short application at the bottom to determine your new career and salary.

You May Sign Up HERE


H/T Big Fur Hat@IOTWReport


Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Friday, January 11, 2019

Rumor Verified: Jim Acosta Does Have Little Lady Hands

Screenshot via Acosta's Tweeter

Jim Acosta confirmed long time whispers of fans of CNN and professional watchers of the media that said the media mouthpiece of the anti-Trump Resistance and self adsorbed, grandstanding  jerk regularly went to great lengths to hide his small effeminate hands from the viewing public. But Thursday, while attempting to mock DJT and the border wall with a self made video posted on the tweeter, Acosta accidentally showed the world ...tens of hundreds of his resistance fans his rumored embarrassing girly hand.  In the past, with instructions to his cameraman, most viewers saw only short glimpses of Acosta's exaggerate hand in a death grip on the shaft of electronic media's all powerful phallic symbol as he reported to the nation, not the relaxed, small teen like digits he himself exposed. 

One unnamed fellow reporter laughed as he watched Acosta's video and said no wonder that petite female White House intern could wrestle a microphone out of Jim's hands, he's lucky she didn't break his wrist. 

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Nations Atheist Prepare To Offer Heartfelt Thanks To Random, Uncaring Universe On Thanksgiving

Again this year the nation's atheist are preparing to humbly show gratitude to the cold, mechanical processes that randomly led to mankind’s existence and their own fleeting lives this Thanksgiving.  They will bow their head silently before partaking in their family’s extravagant Thanksgiving feast Thursday evening to give thanks to the meaningless, cold, inconsequential universe; that vast and ancient universe that doesn’t care at all whether they live or die, for the blind, heartless processes that inevitably led them to eat this great feast, and thank those who died instead of their ancestors, so that they would be selected to survive in an endless, cruel cycle of natural selection that allows once again to enjoy bounty of celebration.

They will be  truly humbled to be able to partake in this futile tradition at least one more year before their inevitable demise and descent into the great black Lovecraftian void beyond.

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

Tips For The Rookie Anarchist From 'The Beverly Hills Antifa'

Thank You MJA for the Linkage!