Thursday, November 30, 2023

Your Official Almost Semi-World Famous Irredeemable Big Ass Mid-Week Open Thread.

It's been another wild week here on the third stone. And your Beloved Blog Editrix is interested in your thoughts on our continuing descent into chaos we are witnessing. 

 You know the ground rules. And use the Coasters. The floor is yours....... 
This Week Your Glorious Exercise in Free Speech is Brought to You By - None Other Than Your Beloved Blog Editrix Herself, Who Loves Each and Everyone of You, and Has Embarked on a Fanciful Shopping Trip to Buy Christmas Gifts. You May Leave Your *Personal Gift Requests in the Comments. 

*Terms and Conditions May Apply

Tuesday, November 28, 2023

Squinty & Meat Puppet Tout Bidens 'Mature Mind' 🤣

What The Hell is Wrong With These People????

On today's episode of Morning with Squinty & Meat Puppet, Mika and Joe both scoffed at the desirability of having a 40-or-50-year-old "straight-A student" as president. Makes sense: Biden's the guy who lied about earning three degrees and finishing in the top half of his law school class. In fact, he finished near the bottom: 76th in a class of 85.

Instead of smarts, Joe, Mika, and their little pet Willie touted how wonderful it is, given the current foreign policy crises, to have someone with Biden's long experience, and his "mature mind." Mature like a banana that's been left on the shelf for two weeks. Pro Tip for Mika: when speaking about Biden, eschew any mention of his "mind." Brings bad images to the public's mind.
"Would I want a man who's got, straight-A student in his 40s or 50s out there? Or do I would I want someone with 40, 50 years of experience on the world stage? That includes decades of wins and losses, politically and geopolitically. And I can't think of somebody else out I'd want. You name 'em. Somebody name a better at this point, more mature mind that can attack these problems and address them with all the different levels of emotion that need to come to the moment. And, and he does it!"
As for Biden's supposedly invaluable foreign policy experience, consider the opinion of Robert Gates. In addition to serving as the CIA director under President George H.W. Bush, Gates was Secretary of Defense under Presidents George W. Bush and Barack Obama. In that latter position, Gates was in a position to observe Joe Biden's foreign policy judgment firsthand. And Gates's opinion is that:
"Biden has been wrong on nearly every major foreign policy and national security issue over the past four decades. Among Biden's foreign policy blunders were his opposition to every one of Ronald Reagan’s military programs to contest the Soviet Union. 
And we know how that turned out, don't we...... 

Monday, November 27, 2023

Example #587 of How We Are Being Gaslit by the Arbiters of Truth

When activists control the narrative of history it no longer becomes history but just an exercise to push a narrative. Wikipedia is rewriting history right in front of our eyes. The same exact thing they did in the 2005 - 2008 Era with Fascism. 

 Old Definition:

New Definition: 

They just pair the terms “far right,” anti-Semitic,” and “ conspiracy” next to anything they don’t like and hope it sticks. Unfortunately there’s a lot of low information people that are easily manipulated by this tactic.

A Good Monday Morning

Saturday, November 25, 2023

Post-Dinner Interview with First-Timer at the Grownup's Table

REPORTER: I’m here live with Ted moments after completing his first start at Thanksgiving dinner at the Grown-Ups’ Table. At only 12 years and 109 days, you are officially the youngest family member to get this opportunity. Were you surprised when you got the news? 
TED: Well, I had a feeling it would happen eventually. Now that cousin Becky is gone off to prison I’ve been working hard at family dinners leading up to Thanksgiving, and I’ve just been trying to get better every day so I’d be ready if the opportunity presented itself. Tonight, I avoided childish mistakes like playing hide and seek with the little cousins. Instead, I watched the football games on TV and made a joke at the expense of the Dallas Cowboys’ playoff hopes, which was well received by the living room. Even Grandpa grunted in agreement, which is rare. At that point, I knew there was a strong possibility I’d be getting the call come dinner time.
 REPORTER: It’s no secret that, historically, you’ve been seen as a picky eater, and some of the family was concerned that Aunt Linda’s yams would throw you off your game. I believe Aunt Linda was quoted saying, “Ted’s gotta be able to handle yams if he wants to eat with the big boys. If you want dino nugs, then stay at the kids’ table.” Did that make you nervous?
TED: Well, Aunt Linda is one hell of a cook and I have nothing but respect for her and what she’s been able to accomplish over the years. With regard to the yams, it’s true that when I was just starting out in this family, I thought they were yucky, and I was very vocal about it at the time. However, I’ve grown a lot as an eater since then and I’ve worked to mature my underdeveloped palate to handle anything that Aunt Linda or anyone else throws my way. Tonight, when I got to the table and saw a lineup of yams, I was able to lean on that preparation and get the job done.
REPORTER: Grown-ups hate phones, especially at the dinner table. How’d you prepare to go without your phone during tonight’s meal?
TED: That’s a great question. I knew I couldn’t afford any phone-related slip-ups. That would immediately put me at a disadvantage, and I didn’t want to be digging myself out of a hole for the remainder of the meal. Before dinner started, I placed my phone on silent mode and powered it down. This helped me clear my head before the meal and eliminate the risk of my phone sounding with a notification that my cousin Bradley is going live on Instagram again.
REPORTER: Let’s talk about Bradley for a minute. Many people criticize this family for bringing kids to the Grown-Ups’ Table before they’re ready. Some say this family doesn’t invest the time to develop their young adults, and they aren’t able to adapt to the pace and rigor of adult conversation. Your cousin Bradley was twelve last year when he made the move to the Grown-Ups’ Table. However, he couldn’t handle the unregulated mashed potato portions or the elevated discussion of his peers. He fell asleep at the table and had to be pulled and escorted off to bed. He has yet to make a full recovery. Since then, he’s gotten detention four times at school, his parents have filed for divorce, he started wearing dresses and was not invited to Thanksgiving this year. Were you at all worried you’d have the some issues?
TED: I’ve heard that story, but I don’t fixate on it. Bradley paved the way for future twelve-year-olds to get called up to the Grown-Ups’ Table, so for that I am thankful. Without him, I wouldn’t be here today, but there’s no defending his behavior last year. Bradley and I are different people, and I wasn’t going to make those same mistakes.
REPORTER: We have to talk about what happened during dessert. To the surprise of many, you teased Grandma that she was cut off for the night. Others your age would just be focusing on making it through dinner without embarrassing themselves, but you had the foresight to exploit the family’s drinking habits for a laugh. Where did you find the courage to try something like that?
TED: This was an opportunity to show that I’m not afraid to make a risky play call when appropriate, and luckily it paid off.
REPORTER: I want to commend you on your maturity when dealing with Uncle Jimbo. About four beers deep, he asked, “So, do you have a girlfriend yet?” What was going through your mind at that moment, and were you at all embarrassed by the question?
TED: We all know that in this family, you’ve gotta be able to roll with the punches. Obviously, this is not the kind of behavior you expect from an adult, but Uncle Jimbo is unpredictable, and I had to show him that I don’t back down. I said, “Yes, I have a girlfriend, and I don’t even pay for Tinder Premium like you.” It got the job done and Uncle Jimbo was a non-factor the rest of the meal.
REPORTER: Well, congratulations, Ted, and thank you for your time. Who knows? Maybe next year you’ll be invited out on the porch for the after-dinner cigar.
TED: Thank you. I’ll give myself a couple minutes to try and enjoy this win, but I’ve gotta stay hungry and build on this momentum. I’ve got my work cut out for me with Christmas in a few weeks. That’ll take a lot of preparation, so that’s what I’ll be focused on moving forward.

REPORTER: That's all from here. Back to you Wolf. 

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Friday, November 24, 2023

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

 ~ No Tuxedos Required ~


Brought to you by The MFST Committee for the Advancement of
 Awesomeness to Your Ears

~ MFST ~

Wednesday, November 22, 2023

Your Almost Semi-World Famous Official Irredeemable Midweek Big Ass Open Thread ~ Thanksgiving Edition

Your Beloved Blog Edtrix, who loves each and every one of you, wishes you a very Happy Thanksgiving. So be sure to Praise the Cook(s), Pray, Eat Drink & Be Merry and Give Thanks for all we have as Americans that so many wish to take from us.

You know the ground rules. And use the Coasters. The floor is yours.......
This Week Your Glorious Exercise in Free Speech is Brought to You By:

The Weirdetarians of PETA

Tuesday, November 21, 2023

The First Thanksgiving. 🦃 Good Thing, Bad Thing? Short Lecture for the Masses by Professor Jimbo.

Discredited high school history teacher, James O'Flannery, describes the origins of AMERICA'S most beloved holiday, Thanksgiving, mostly without profanity and while sober (we think).

Gather 'round to hear the story of THE FIRST THANKSGIVING, featuring Squanto, William Bradford, Thomas Dermer, Samoset, Massasoit, the Puritans, the Pilgrims, Henry VIII , Anne Boleyn and much, much, more!

A Production By Our Friends

~ Thank You WHATFINGER NEWS for the Linkage! ~

Saturday, November 18, 2023

Democrat Rep. Dan Goldman Surprised His Party of Hateful Bigots is Filled With Hateful Bigots.

Rep. Dan Goldman (Douche-NY)

"What we have seen over the last six weeks is a latent antisemitism bubbling over into the public sphere that’s coming from the far fringe left. It is incredibly disheartening, Jake, that, in the aftermath of the most brutal, horrific attack, genocidal terrorist attack on Jews in Israel on October 7, that, rather than rally around the Jewish community and Israel, what we are seeing on college campuses and elsewhere, all around the country, and certainly, in New York City, is a rise in antisemitism, and it is somewhat bewildering and perplexing for me, and it’s very deflating and disheartening to see.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

For someone from NY who can't wait to get his mug on camera with the bigots and anti-Semites at MSNBC, Danny boy should know there's nothing latent about leftist anti-Semitism, it's always been there.

If you go where extreme leftists hangout, they're comfortable with spewing out their bigotry among their echo chamber comrades. It's just now these same people are feeling bold enough to verbalize their once internal dialogue of hatred and have now gone public. They are the cult of hate and destruction. They are university marinated minds of fools and anti-American immigrants. They are Dan Goldman's people. 

Democrats have been feeding these snakes for far too long. He is beginning to see these lunatics for who they are.

Rep. Goldman, you have met the enemy and it is you

Friday, November 17, 2023

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

 ~ No Tuxedos Required ~

Brought To You By BLUESJUNKY: Middle Finger Symphony Chair of Music

Thursday, November 16, 2023

Throwback Thursday: Tragedy Strikes the Hilton Hotel Empire

It is common knowledge to the regular readers of DMF that we have little no respect for the bed bug ridden Hilton Hotel Chain and their small minded personal vendetta toward DMF/MFNS that they insist on continuing.  And while we refuse to lower ourselves to their level and choose to ignore their closed minded prejudices against our Fair and Balanced editorial views and slam of our journalistic integrity, we can't help but share in their loss of one the more unfortunate members of the Hilton family empire.

RIP - Tinkerbell V. Hilton
Middle Finger News Service Wire

Paris Hilton’s Chihuahua Finally Dies of Embarrassment

(Beverly Hills) - The Chihuahua which Paris Hilton famously carried around in her handbag everywhere she went is believed  to have finally passed away from embarrassment over the weekend, we now can report. Hilton kept the poor, benighted animal in her handbag for 14 long, miserable years until it finally entered a far, far better world late Saturday night.

The Chihuahua, named Tinkerbell, is said to have died when the embarrassment of wearing ‘the most delightful little diamond-studded pink-frilled two piece and tiara’ finally tipped her over the edge into a terminal decline.

A source close to Tinkerbell said:
“For years she would spend her days mortified at the abomination she had become under Paris’ ownership. How many self-respecting dogs own cashmere sweaters and silk neckerchiefs?  She was derided amongst her own kind and longed for the blessed relief of eternal rest. Finally she is at peace.”
The fashion statement of keeping miniature animals in handbags first appeared in the early 2000’s among people who like their personal accessories to smell of dog piss, and has proven to be inexplicably popular among America's female 1% elite.  Entire breeds of miniature dog were created which existed solely to fill the clutch bags of witless socialites.

MFNS Fashion Correspondent Julian Ferret-Smartly: 
“It’s the end of an era really.  Paris single-handedly created the trend for tiny shit-machines in your handbag, and she stuck with it through thick and thin. I expect she’s completely distraught. What’s going to relieve itself in her purse now?”
A spokesman for Paris Hilton told us she hoped to move on from the death of her beloved pet, and aimed to start a new trend by keeping incontinent pigeons in her Purse.

When word of the tragic circumstances and death of Tinkerbell reached Pair Hilton's one time BFF Kim Kardashian , she tweeted:
"so sorry 4 your los. guess i better ree think draggin my monkey Kanye around so much"  #buhbyetinkerbell


From the Archives of  Middle Finger News Service - Originally Published May 2015 

Wednesday, November 15, 2023

Courtney's Wednesday Choice Open Tabs Just For You. Consequently, Your Voluntary Attendance is Required.

Courtney Is Judging You Now

Ugly Dykes and Dostoevsky 
   Don't know why the rear end of a 59' Chevy Impala comes to mind......
     Epic Tweeter Mockery Ensued.

 *  ‘We Will Drink Your Blood and Eat Your Skull’ 
     Mascara Poisoning?? A shriek from the loony-bin.
   Don't think even the weirdest dwarf wouldn't live with this chick. 

* Kickback City - That Dark Money in Your Pocket
   Now you know where all that money comes from that Nonprofits and NGOs contribute to 
   Dem's election coffers. 

   You Guys! I swear. 

   Day 7

    Not to worry. There's also a plan B

*  What does a Commie Millionaire married to a crazy Code Pink chick do with his spare change?
    Very Interesting Read

Tuesday, November 14, 2023

Mexican Cartels Issue a Letter of Gratitude to Their "Man of the Year."

(MFNS)- Guano Mexico- The hostile Northern Mexican Cartels called a temporary truce long enough to issued a joint communique to the White House stating their undying gratitude for what they called "Outstanding Work on Behalf of the Cartels Man of the Year" for 2023.
Cartel Man of the Year - El Presidente' Joe Biden

In the communique they praised Biden for "reversing previous leader's hindering border protections" and "spoon feeding his useful idiots in the media the cover story that the border was closed, to which they dutiful repeated to their audience of gringo retards, helping give free reign to violate the sovereign border mostly unimpeded and away from most prying eyes of the press. Well played Mr. Biden."

They went on to confirm that with Biden's help more than 9 million illegals' cross the border mostly unopposed and into the open arms of the border patrol after being extorted for millions by the cartels to be led across safely. They also praised "El Presidente' for the opportunity to "export central America's undesirables across the border to relive the jail overcrowding and to help America with it's lack of diversity"

Praise was showered for the "opportunity for lucrative human trafficking of women and unaccompanied children for the benefit of the perverted liberal elites and the criminal underground forced sex work." 

The cartels were especially in praise of El Presidente' Biden and his pups in the media for the ability to quash any suggestion of responsibility on Biden's part for the growing number of deaths on the streets of America from the large quantities of drugs they were able to import during undetected night crossing in the last three years. The fentanyl alone worth millions, was enough to kill every American while border patrol was feeding and babysitting border jumpers. 

With the massive amounts of money Biden has given the Cartels opportunity to make from extortion of illegals and the importation of drugs and child sex slaves, the heavily armed cartels thanked Biden for control of most of northern Mexico and large sections of border.

The communiqué ended with anticipations of continuing non-aggression and good wishes and hopes for even further cooperation in the future. 

~ Thank You Larwyn's Linx@ Doug Ross Journal for the Linkage! ~

Friday, November 10, 2023

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

 ~ No Tuxedos Required ~


Brought to you by The MFST Committee for the Advancement of
 Awesomeness to Your Ears

~ MFST ~

Thursday, November 9, 2023

Your Official Almost Semi-World Famous Irredeemable Big Ass Mid-Week Open Thread.

It's been another wild week on the third stone. And your Beloved Blog Edtrix,who loves each and every one of you, is interested in your thoughts on our continuing descent into chaos we are witnessing, both here and abroad.
You know the ground rules. And use the Coasters. The floor is yours.......
This Week Your Glorious Exercise in Free Speech is Brought to You By:
The Sandwich Massachusetts Dept.of Public Safety 

Tuesday, November 7, 2023

'Chucky Three Sticks' Plans to Ban Fags in UK

King Chuck III
The Sun - "During what's known as the King's Speech, the ceremonial beginning of the legislative year, the monarch confirmed that Prime Minister Rishi Sunak will mount a historic crackdown on cigarettes. The planned legislation will raise the legal age of buying cigarettes every year until there are no smokers left. 
The ban will be subject to a "free vote," meaning Members of Parliament will not be told how to vote by party enforcers. The plan was originally rejected by ministers when suggested previously. But the Labour Party has confirmed its intention to vote with the Conservative government, so the new law is expected to fly through."
Now, following the logic of our do-gooder betters in today's world, next step is to censor the old war movie scenes where the handsome young heroic pilot climbs out of their bullet hole ridden Sopwith Camel or sputtering Spitfire after a harrowing dogfight with the huns and lights up a cigarette as their one comfort that they dodged the grim reaper of war once more. And so it goes......

~ Thank You Larwyn's Linx@ Doug Ross Journal for the Linkage! ~

The Wheels Are Coming Off

"Are the wheels coming off the Biden Administration? It looks like it, to the extent that this shambolic vehicle for a third Obama term ever had wheels to begin with. But it’s not just the numbers......" 
"As the Times reports: “Discontent pulsates throughout the Times/Siena poll. . . . The survey also reveals the extent to which the multiracial and multigenerational coalition that elected Mr. Biden is fraying. Demographic groups that backed Mr. Biden by landslide margins in 2020 are now far more closely contested, as two-thirds of the electorate sees the country moving in the wrong direction........” 
"Biden is hemorrhaging votes among Hispanics, his margin among women is dwarfed by opposition from men, and Black support for Trump is up to 22%, “a level unseen in Presidential politics for a Republican in modern times.  It’s particularly impressive that Trump is polling so well given the near-universal opposition of major media organs, and the campaign of systematic legal harassment that has had him indicted four times and sued in civil courts both by Democratic state attorneys general and private citizens. Maybe doubling down on a strategy of expensive energy, housing, and food was a bad idea for the Biden Administration." - GLENN REYNOLDS

Monday, November 6, 2023

Thank You!....... all you regular DMFers, Drive-bys, Silent Lurkers and all who link to DMF out there. 

Your Beloved Blog Editrix has been informed that October was the Best Month DMF has ever had since starting regular daily publication in 2012!  This October's traffic numbers fell only 700 page views short of actually doubling the traffic numbers of October of 2019. 

You Made It Happen.  You Make It Worthwhile.  Thank You Guys! ❤️

A Good Monday Morning

Sunday, November 5, 2023

"Please, somebody stop us before we enlighten again."

Apparently, they don't teach this stuff at Drag Queen Story Hour these days.

H/T Althouse

Friday, November 3, 2023

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

 ~ No Tuxedos Required ~

Brought To You By BLUESJUNKY: Middle Finger Symphony Chair of Music

Thursday, November 2, 2023

Even His Own Family Doesn't Like Him

Family Members Disowned Him by Certified Letter.

Disgraced Never Trumper Republican lawmaker-turned-social media personality, Rep. Adam Kinzinger (R-IL), claimed in an interview with CNN's Andy Cooper that he received a “certified letter” from members of his family informing him that they were officially “disowning” him.

The weepy ex-congressman, who was a member of the Democrats’ anti-Trump Jan6 Committee, says his family suggested he can no longer be trusted. He claims his family had turned against him because of remarks made by Fox News Sean Hannity.

Kinzinger announced his retirement from Congress in 2021 after he lost his seat to redistricting. Ironically, Kinziger’s Democrat allies were the ones who redistricted him out of his seat. LOL! 'Lil Adam is now fallen so far as to make appearances on the hate-fest "The View" and routinely posts silly messages on Twitter/X targeting Trump, re-hashing  partisan feuds that have faded from the consciousness of the broader public.

Weepy Adam was one of a handful of Republicans to vote to impeach President Donald Trump after the Jan. 6, 2021 disturbance and plans to support Joe Biden in 2024. Get that boy a tissue.