Monday, March 28, 2011

Publius Minimus to Diogenes......"Its one thing to shoot your mouth off during a presidential campaign; sound much smarter then you really are and say whatever will get yourself elected. It’s an entirely different thing to be elected President, and with all the information and intelligent at your disposal, to govern domestically and as the leader of the free world as if you’re still that ill-informed candidate. Well, at least it was until two years ago."    

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Great Moments in History #21

Ms. Swanson went on to be an unprecedented 10 time winner.  
She also pursued a movie career in her in her spare time.  

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Educational Crash Course #14

Another Installment of Diogenes'
 Public Service Educational Series:

Next in the series: Genetics for beginners
with Rev. Louis Farrakhan  

 ......Class Dismissed!

Monday, March 21, 2011

Publius Minimus to Diogenes......"Does anyone actually know who these Libyan rebels are, and what they want other than no more Muammar el-Qaddafi?  Have we just given aid to radical muslims, who may form another Iranian-style theocracy or Taliban, and are handing them the doorstep to Europe? I doubt very seriously they want constitutional democracy, pluralistic society and WiFi access, and I don’t think they're fighting to make Libya safe for Starbuck's and Arby's."

Great Moments in History #14

On this day in 1964...

To counter the onslaught of the sixties British Music Invasion, legendary rock band 'Newman, Davis, Mitchum, Martin & Garner' was formed as music's first "Super Group". Gigs were raucous and far between, and the band finally disbanded to spend time on solo careers and film projects. Their ground breaking formula has been followed successfully many time since. Band members privately blamed the groups demise on the  refusal of Frank Sinatra to join the project after insisting on he be lead singer, and which kind of hats would be worn. 

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Joseph R. Biden Railroad Station Christened

With only a minor delay, like the Amtrak C.E.O having to be brought to the event in a car  after his train was delayed, the historic refurbished Wilmington Train Station was put into service officially as "The Joseph R. Biden Jr. Railroad Station" today.

The refurbished Station received $20 million in federal stimulus funds and managed to come in somewhere in the neighborhood of $5.7 million over budget.

Tax Payers and fans gave a big send-off to the  
Vice President and the first train as it leaves out of  
the newly christened Biden Station.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Now Leaving Gate 37...........The Crazy Train.

From Capitalist Preservation  

Joe Biden and Amtrak. 
America's two favorite long time  
Federal subsidies. 
" Joe Biden lost out on having a school named after him in his home state of Delaware. This is sad. How does a sitting Vice President of the United States, and I do mean sitting, get SOMETHING, ANYTHING named in their honor? Hmmmm..." Will Profit

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Memo: For Immediate Release....


Monday, March 14, 2011

Publius Minimus to Diogenes......

Publius Minimus to Diogenes......"A gentleman is always mindful of the obligations and duties demanded by courtesy and good manners. That way you tend to sound more believable in the police report."

I Guess it's Easy to Pick the Right Golf Club.

One of the very real criticisms of Barack Obama by his detractors is his seeming inability to make a decision about anything. This should come as no surprise seeing in his abbreviated term in the U.S. Senate he rarely ever decided anything,  preferring to vote 'Present' on the order of 200 times. On those rare occasions when Obama does make a decision, the process is almost guaranteed to be protracted and that stalling process is pretty much the result of Obama getting too much input, hearing too many opinions, weighing too many options, considering far too many variables. Or is he just not as smart as we were lead to believe?

For democrats, delay, procrastination, indecision, obfuscation, is all part of the Grand illusion of The Great Man of History tragically wrestling with the problems of the day, and the 'Burdens of the Oval Office', which when juxtaposed against black-and-white photos and tinny music is supposed to represent the idealized vision and drama of 'Leadership'. But turns out it's really a mental handicap.

I have been told people who behave this way usually have a serious problem with confidence. Not making decisions is the first indication. Going through a laborious and overwrought process in which all of your attention is focused the on details, no matter how small, is the second indication. People who can never have enough input, can never stop considering putting more and more variables into the decision-making process are not being decisive; they're simply collecting or creating more excuses to not make any decision whatsoever.

While we certainly do not want a Chief Executive who makes hasty, and poorly thought through decisions, neither do want one who dithers over the process, or who burdens himself with too many options. We want, we need, someone to lead. The process of leading requires that the Leader make decisions, surely with the best available information and facts at his command, but not burdened by the fear that the pettiest detail and remotest possibility will always be that one thing you forgot that finally bites you on the ass.

I can understand why Obama is burdened with this particular handicap. He came into office, I think, never having expected to have won in the first place. His experiences in life never prepared him for the reality of having to make the sort of decisions a President in his predicament has to make (to be fair, I don't know what sort of experience, short of the battlefield, can prepare anyone for that sort of thing). I don't think he ever put his name on a piece of legislation while in the Senate, never voiced an opinion until he was certain he knew how it would be received, and he never held a private-sector job in his life.

I'd even go as far as to say that Barack Obama is probably the best example of a poster child for the mollycoddled-advanced-beyond-his-abilities-all-shortcomings-get-papered-over-socially-promoted-Affirmative-Action-Achiever. And I bet the The First Lady lays out his clothes for him in the morning.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

File Under: 'This is Not Going to End Well'


Illustrations of the
Self Cleaning Mode of the Gene Pool. 

Thursday, March 10, 2011

American Asshat: Michael Moore

Nominee for Diogenes' 2011 Asshat of the Year 

Michael, Michael, Michael. 
It's rare indeed that I agree with you on anything. However, recently you did say something that did make me nod my head in agreement.  During a recent interview, you said the following:
"They're sitting on the money, they're using it for their own ….they're putting it someplace else with no interest in helping you with your life, with that money. We've allowed them to take that. That's not theirs, that's a national resource, that's ours. We all have this -- we all benefit from this or we all suffer as a result of not having it."

At first Michael, I scoffed at the notion. After all, as a conservative and an unrepentant capitalist pig, why would I support the collective ownership of wealth?  Then came the epiphany. You're absolutely right, Michael. The rich should share their wealth with everyone. And I can think of no better person to lead by example than, well, you.

Moore, just before the chair collapses
According to , your net worth is estimated to be somewhere in the neighborhood of $50 million. Granted, that's not Bill Gates kinda cash, but it's not too shabby for a self promoting asshole like yourself.  So, as one of the "common people" you so love to claim to represent, I believe I'm entitled to at least some of that nest egg.

For example, I have accumulated a few medical bills over the past few months. As the champion of the "little guy" in your film "Sicko" as you took on the health care system in America, I think it only fair for a rich guy like you to whip out the checkbook and pay them for me. I also have a little credit card debt. (that last trip to the Virgin Islands got a little outa hand, know what I'm sayin') As the champion of the "little guy" in your film "Capitalism: A Love Story” you took on big banks and Wall street and the way they are screwing us all. And today you had this to say: 
"America isn't broke. The money's just not in the people's hands. It's in the hands of the rich, the rich who committed these crimes back on Wall Street and they got away with it."
So I think you outa be more than willing to pay off my debt and get me out from under their thumb. Right?

More importantly, think of the good example you'd be setting for wealthy people of your political persuasion.

Babs Streisand Relaxing at Home
Why, I'm sure Barbara Streisand would be more than willing to hand over her...I mean our money to people like me. Afterall, she lives in disgusting opulence and is only going to keep it for herself, right? Ditto with Oprah, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, and other celebrities who swing to the left. All they need is just someone to lead them.I believe that someone is you, Michael.

So, I propose we meet and hammer out the specifics of this arrangement. Let's say, a nice steakhouse in New York City maybe?  You can pay for me to fly out there, put me up in a really nice hotel and be kind enough to pick up the entire tab without so much as a second thought. 
After all, it's our money, right Michael?

But what really upset me today Michael, was your uncivil words and angry rhetoric I thought you and your leftist buddies so abhor these days:
"I just want to say, anybody who lives within driving distance of Madison, Wisc., right now should make their way to the capital. I would love to see thousands of people there right now, there in that capital building, in the rotunda, out on the lawn, whatever it takes. I mean, really, this is really, this is war. This is a class war that's been leveled against the working people of this country and at some point people are going to just have to stand up and say, non-violently, this is enough. We're not taking it anymore. ..." 
Your shameless opportunist call for more disruption of the  business of government in Madison Wisconsin shows a lack of understanding of the issues and the common asshattery prevalent in your kind of mentality.
And in my book, you will always be the premier pustule on the ass of the nation.

 Quote Source: NewsBusters 


Educational Crash Course #5

Another Installment of Diogenes'
   Public Service Educational Series:

'The Art History'

Next in the series: The Technical Evolution of Scissors  

.......Class Dismissed.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

From the Land of Obscurity.....

*EXCLUSIVE: Keith Olbermann Surfaces*
Reports from inside satellite channel 'Current TV ' say the new star of the network, former MSNBC flame thrower Keith Olbermann,  has been taking on random duties for his boss Al Gore while awaiting the still unscheduled airing of his new prime time show. 
Mr. Olbermann is seen here greeting guest at the Gore mansion at an Academy Award night dinner party Al Gore held for his celebrity and politician friends two weeks ago in California. 

It's been rumored for some time from the underside of the Current TV network operation that Mr. Olbermann has been required to take "extensive masseur training" as part of his contract obligations insisted on by Mr. Gore at the time of his hiring at the network. We are not quite sure why or what it has to do with Mr. Olbermanns new upcoming show.

Olbermann's new gig has been kept under tight raps, but is said to have been given a solid positioning in the lineup between the shows 'Kill It, Cook It, Eat It ' and 'Cooking in the Danger Zone '. 

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Yeah, I'm Picking on Big Al Again!


Let's move on from this Charlie Sheen story. It's distracting us from learning about even crazier celebrities.

Useful Idiot and Hugo Chavez tool, Sean Penn
"In his own idiotic way Sean Penn is pulling his international version of Charlie Sheen, but without the panache or the humor....."
Yeah, remember crazyass Venezuelan dictator ass kisser / academy award winner Sean Penn, and his great performance portraying an idiot (not a real big stretch there) who once said Journalists who call Hugo Ch├ívez a dictator should be jailed and Penn's critics should die screaming of rectal cancer. Well he has now teamed up with his pal......yeah, you guessed it, Charlie Sheen, and is gonna take him back down to Haiti to do some charity work. 

That's exactly what an earthquake and cholera ridden island needs is a manic, ranting, coked-out millionaire TV star down there furthering his self-destructive publicity stunt!  

But, dragging crazy Charlie around will get you back into the news, 
eh Sean?

Friday, March 4, 2011

Clinton: We're Going With the Winning Side.

The U.S. State Department issued its strongest message to date about the developing situation in the Middle East by making absolutely clear their intentions "to stand by whichever side winds up winning". 

President Obama joined Secretary of State Hillary Clinton at the press conference where she made clear, "We are vigilantly standing on the sidelines and offering the strongest possible monitoring of events from a distance.”
The pro-winning-side message, articulated by Secretary Clinton, was intended to send a clear signal that the United States is willing to put all of its power, might and prestige on the line as soon as matters are settled.

The President, speaking without the luxury of a teleprompter stumbled through a repeat of Clinton's statement and added Uh......The administration backs  Secretary Clinton’s mixed message...uh hundred percent.  The President then went on to apologize to the owners of a middle eastern restaurant down the street from the White House for any perceived  hostile posturing by the U.S.  

Secretary Clinton seemed to rule any possible change in policy concerning the present situation in the future, “We will remain consistent in our policy of issuing meaningless statements at random intervals.”

 Clinton also strongly urge dictators to resist the temptation to pass power on to their sons buy reminding them: “If that had happened on ‘The West Wing,’ that would have been Charlie Sheen.”

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The Earl of Ketchup Goes Hawkish

U.S. Senator John Kerry (D-Mass), Duke of Heinz, Earl of Ketchup today said the U.S. Military should set up and maintain a No Fly Zone over Libyian airspace.
Sen.Kerry, a [Navy] veteran turned anti-war activist and critic of the use of the military by Reagan, Bush 41 and campaigned for the presidency in part against Bush 43's efforts at waging of war on terror (while never criticizing the bombing of civilians during Clinton's misuse of the air force in Kosovo and ignoring the rivers of Rwanda running red with blood and headless bodies) now wants to inject us into a senseless operation and endangering our fighter pilots over Libyan airspace. 

NO, Senator Kerry! This is a problem better addressed by NATO, the European forces of NATO! Europe imports more of their oil from Libya then America and  could be confronted by mass immigration that could come their way from north Africa, so let them let deal with it.
It's their backyard. 

Let the French Italians, Germans and  Belgians pilots take the high risk operations of disabling the Libyan air defenses, which must be done first . We have more important things to tend to, like fighting the war on terror for them! 

 And is it just me, or is it coincidental that anti-war demonstrations tend to disappear and some democrats get all brave, gutsy and hawkish when their guys occupy the White House? Just a thought.