Mayans 'Full of Shit' say Experts from within Lead-lined Bunker

Daily Mash

Scientist have laughed in the face of the apocalypse from their nuclear bunker beneath a mountain. Speaking from one and a half miles beneath the Sierra Nevada mountain range, experts from the Institute for Doom Studies dismissed 12/21/12 apocalypse predictions as hokum. 

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Such is our indifference to the 13th b’ak’tun and the rogue planet Nibiru that we’re hosting a invitation only big ass ‘un-Apocalypse’ party for the scientific community, world leaders and genetically superior individuals.  

“In a bunker. Because bunkers are fun places.”

Surrounded by thousands of boxes of crisps, test-tubes full of urine and bottles of Orangina, Professor Brubaker said: “What did the Mayans know anyway? Apart from that Magnum ice cream and the film Apocalypto, all they’ve given us is a remarkably prescient understanding of the universe that appears to have been developed in conjunction with extraterrestrial intelligence.”

Elsewhere in the underground complex, radiologist and father of two, Julian Cook was busy writing ironic farewell letters to his wife and children. “It’s totally an ironic thing. If and when Susan opens it on the 22nd December, she’ll be like “That is so Julian.” He then added that the letter wasn’t actually ironic, that he was terrified and if you type 21/12/2012 in Wingdings on Microsoft Word it comes out as a picture of a giant lizard with the face of a dog.

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Meet your next Secretary of State

via Talk Straight

“He’s old. He’s white. He’s clearly a member of the ‘evil 1%’. He doesn’t pay his taxes. He admits to taking part in war atrocities. He committed treasonous acts and also admits breaking the law by meeting with Viet Cong leaders. His ‘Vietnam Veterans Winter Soldier Investigation’ was later exposed as a total fraud.

“He wore fake medals while testifying before Congress. And, based on this photo, he’s clearly a ‘gun nut’. But he’s a liberal…so there’s nothing to see here. Meet your next Secretary of State, John Kerry.”

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Attorney General Secretly Granted Gov. Ability to Develop and Store Dossiers on Innocent Americans

"In a secret government agreement granted without approval or debate from lawmakers, the U.S. attorney general recently gave the National Counterterrorism Center sweeping new powers to store dossiers on U.S. citizens, even if they are not suspected of a crime, according to a news report.

Earlier this year, Attorney General Eric Holder granted the center the ability to copy entire government databases holding information on flight records, casino-employee lists, the names of Americans hosting foreign-exchange students and other data, and to store it for up to five years, even without suspicion that someone in the database has committed a crime, according to the Wall Street Journal, which broke the story.

Whereas previously the law prohibited the center from storing data compilations on U.S. citizens unless they were suspected of terrorist activity or were relevant to an ongoing terrorism investigation, the new powers give the center the ability to not only collect and store vast databases of information but also to trawl through and analyze it for suspicious patterns of behavior in order to uncover activity that could launch an investigation....."

Read More.....

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A Good Monday Morning

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Steppin' Up Crazy

"Special Ed" Schultz  Advocates “Confiscating” Guns 

But the facts show gun bans don't work.....

But for a moment, put aside the debate over gun laws that started before the dead had been properly counted in Newtown, Connecticut, and help me understand why there are so many crazy people walking around. I’m not talking about odd people, or angry people with bad tempers. I’m talking psychotic-you-can-see-it-in-their-eyes-from-fifty-feet-away crazy. Jared Loughner. James Egan Holmes. Seung-Hui Cho. These guys didn’t exactly hide their craziness from the world.

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Pelosi Slams Republicans of a “lack of concern” over Kwanzaa.

Maybe because it not a real holiday.......

Like she really cares about a black liberation based “holiday”. This is just another example of the Left pandering to a stereotyped black community (after all, in people like Pelosi’s eyes, all black people celebrate Kwanzaa-you know….cause it’s the black holiday), so they can go “Look at us. We understand and love your blackness. Totally ignore the fact that we’re insulting the majority of the black community who are Christian- We just love us some Kwanzaa!! Now have more foodstamps and vote Democrat!”

But the really sad part? The black community continues to fall for it.

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Who is Obama really negotiating with over the fiscal cliff?

Spellchek

I wasn’t going to post on the fiscal cliff because it’s being covered ad nauseam already, but I can’t help it and have to throw in my two cents on what’s driving it anyway. Why are the ‘negotiations’ being conducted in secret? That’s easy. There aren’t any and neither party wants the public to know that. After all, this is the fiscal cliff, right? Armageddon and all that. Can’t be seen doing nothing or it really kills the effect. That’s why there are no serious offers because compromise isn’t in the cards. Both sides throw out proposals guaranteed to be rejected by the other side because they have already made their political calculations on the fallout.

Obama isn’t negotiating with the GOP. He’s negotiating with the 20 Senate democrats whose seats are up for re-election in 2014. They will be most vulnerable to a public backlash if we go over the fiscal cliff. He needs them to vote to go over the cliff when the GOP passes legislation in the House extending tax cuts for all. He isn’t concerned with House democrats since they are outnumbered. They already have cover to vote as they wish if they are concerned about a 2014 backlash.

Clearly, Obama prefers to go over the cliff. It’s a wish list of goodies for him if we do like defense cuts and raising taxes for all, something he can’t do under his class envy narrative. Oh, don’t worry about another recession. That’s bonus as well. The obstructionist GOP will get blamed and then he will have the political capital required for more stimulus. 9% unemployment again as some economists predict? More bonus as he can extend unemployment benefits. We could go on but you get the picture.

People need to get past this notion that Obama is concerned with a poor economy or high unemployment. He considers those opportunities. An ideologue needs instability and fear in order to implement their agenda. The negatives we see today aren’t failures of his policies, they are successes in his eyes. If we were just trucking along with 4% unemployment and 6-8% GDP numbers each quarter, he couldn’t get his agenda through. Seems a little convoluted but not when you consider his ideology. It trumps all.

Take defense cuts in light of the instability around the globe. Doesn’t make sense to a logical thinking person. But Obama has been clear on this. He see’s America as imperialist. He fully intends to eliminate our capability to initiate full-scale wars anymore. Our stated goal for decades has been to have the ability to fight wars on two fronts simultaneously. Not anymore. The pivot toward the Asia-Pacific region is not just talk. We are pulling up stakes in the Middle East. Israel will be left to go it alone. Turkey and Jordan have been longtime allies in the region, but that is changing as we speak. Do you think it mere coincidence that the Muslim Brotherhood is taking over state by state? Syria and Lebanon will fall as well.

To think that over 62 million Americans are so blind as to re-elect him despite the handwriting on the wall flashing in large neon letters not to do it is as frustrating and disappointing as the founders could have ever envisioned. They saw much and put in safeguards in the Constitution to protect against them. Big government is nothing new as that threat has been around far longer than America. Nor is ruling by a tyrant or dictator. But to think that we the people would embrace our demise so blindly is tough to swallow.

Worried about going over the fiscal cliff? Be more worried about any deal to prevent it.

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Some Doggs Just Ain't Worth Having

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No Incentives Needed.......

When they advocate higher taxes and regulations on job creators, Democrats pretend that incentives are irrelevant. In real life, Democrats know better:

* Google CEO Eric Schmidt is a long time Obama supporter but Google uses an impressively complicated series of shell companies to hide its corporate profits from taxation here, and from over seas taxations.

* Former Senator John Kerry, rumored to be a possible cabinet pick in Obama's second term, happily hid his 76-foot yacht from Massachusetts taxes until his subterfuge was publicly exposed. 

* Warren Buffett is a prominent Obama supporter who calls for higher taxes on the rich. Yet, he has arranged for most of his estate to escape taxation while calling for increasing the estate tax.

Apparently, the cognitive dissonance (that subtle creepy feeling we're not quite done tweaking our belief system) seemingly causes them no pain.  

h/t City Square 

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It's Time for the 2012 Puk Awards

Yes, it's awards season 2012, and iOwnTheWorld.com is kicking things off with the 2012 Puk Awards, given out  for the best of conservative agitprop for the year.

So go by and nominate the best work from your favorite websites. Nominations are open until Dec 17th. There is a lot of amazing artwork out there, go by and check it out.

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But Remember What They Always Say - It's All About The Kids....

At least 26,000 children will miss school today because their teachers called in sick or took a vacation day to protest proposed right-to-work legislation enacted in Michigan.

“We’ve had an excessive number of teachers call in,” Warren district spokesperson Robert Freehan said Monday afternoon. “We’re concerned about the safety and security of the students, so we’re treating it as a snow day.”

Read More

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Democrats Begin Working Toward Pantsuit’s Coronation

"One of the most pronounced recent changes in the attitudes toward leadership and order of the two major American political parties is the reversal in affection for handing off the baton to the next in line. Republicans had long bestowed the party’s presidential nomination on last time’s runner-up, or a candidate who had put in his time and whose turn, it was believed, had come.But the battle for the 2016 GOP nomination is looking wide open, and will likely consist of a cast of young, more conservative candidates competing to set the party’s new direction.

The Democrats, on the other hand, nominated Barack Obama in 2008 with the rallying cry of striking out against political entitlement, embodied by Hillary Clinton. Next time, however, Democrats seem to want a coronation, not a nomination. And they would like the beneficiary of this appointment with history to be Hillary Clinton.  Recently James Carville said on“This Week with George Stephanopoulos”:

"This is entirely different. Every Democrat I know says, God, I hope she runs. We don’t need a primary. Let’s just go to post with this thing. We don’t want to fight with anybody over anything.”

The Republicans, they need a fight. Somebody’s got to beat somebody….

Yeah, you’ve got to beat somebody. And the Republicans know that they need a primary. We don’t want — we don’t want a primary. We don’t want to be slugging this thing out (inaudible) you know what? We’ve got a pretty good demographic deck. We kind of get — we like winning presidential elections. She’s popular. Let’s just go with it."

Aside from the obvious, there’s a key phrase Carville used here that went unnoticed on the show. The Democrats have “a pretty good demographic deck.” Not only do the Democrats want to avoid a primary election, they’d like to avoid a general election too. Though Carville probably didn’t have this in mind when he used the phrase, running a “historic” candidate like Clinton would basically be a replay of Obama’s two elections, in which the media coverage was fawning and devoid of any serious examination of the Democratic candidate, and in which opposition to the Democrats’ candidate can be chalked up to bigotry. “We don’t want to fight with anybody over anything,” says Carville. Expect that to be the case in 2016 if Clinton is their candidate.

Take a gander at the New York Times’s article on Clinton’s options going forward. It’s appallingly worshipful, but it’s only the beginning. The conceit of the piece is a question: What should Hillary do? It’s a clear indication that Clinton wants people to think she’s running, and buried in the article we finally get the reason why. The Times tells us that Clinton “may appear to be a figure of nearly limitless possibility.” There is nothing she can’t do, so what should she do? The Times asks another related question and then endeavors to answer it:

"What is the most dignified way for her to make money?" 

Keep Reading 

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Even More Hilarious Than Before........

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State Department Spent 4.5 Million for Embassy Art, Had No Money for Benghazi Security

Remember Benghazi only happened because the State Department had no money for security. And the military had no money for planes. And Obama had no money for his campaign and had to rush to Vegas to fundraise with Beyonce.

Things that the State Department did have money for? Mosque renovations, promoting environmental awareness in Baghdad, and 4.5 million for Art in Embassies. 

The New York Times reported in 2009 that Art in Embassies spends about $4.5 million a year for permanent art acquisitions; chief curator Virginia Shore said at the time that artists and dealers support the program via favorable pricing; for the embassy in Beijing, an outlay of $800,000 yielded works with an appraised value of $30 million. 

So… maybe we can sell some of that as a profit and pay for bodyguards. Or we could just hand out medals to the artists in exchange for favorable pricing. Yes, let’s do that.

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Un bonjour lundi.....Y'all

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