Free Offer From The Democrat National Committee:

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Obama Campaign Spokeswoman Worried He Will Be Too “Professional” Sounding During Debates For Normal People To Understand…

Because, yes, they really do think you’re that stupid.

Beltway Confidential:

"President Obama’s campaign spokeswoman said she’s concerned Obama will sound too “professorial” to resonate with the low-information voters tuning into the presidential campaign for the first time during this week’s debate.

“[W]hat the American [people] are looking for is not just a professorial list of facts or accomplishments or even goals,” Obama campaign spokeswoman Jen Psaki said yesterday as part of her ongoing, almost-comical attempt to lower expectations going into the debates. She then lamented that Obama “has a tendency to give longer, substantive answers.”

Psaki’s concern that Professor Obama will appear during the debates is understandable given that “he was the third-lowest-ranked lecturer” at the University of Chicago Law School in 1999.

Still, Obama’s background as a professor is more of a running joke in conservative circles than a typical Democratic criticism of the president. So why would Psaki bring it up now (beyond, again, the absurd expectations game that both sides play)?

Maybe it has to do with their target audience. “He wants to speak directly to the families — the people who are on their couches at home, having snacks, drinking a beer, drinking soda, whatever it is, and tuning in for the first time — and that’s who he’s speaking directly to,” she said.

Psaki explained that Obama’s debate advisers “pointed out to him that he needs to work on tightening and shortening his answers.”

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Leaked: Obama’s National Security Strategy

via In to the Breach

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CNN to Release Entire On-Air Staff

Middle Finger News Service

Atlanta - It was announced in a hastily called news conference Saturday night that Cable News Giant CNN is to fire the entire prime-time on-air news reporting staff effective October 1. CNN President of Media relation, Jim "Pinky" Cogburn and Founder of the Cable News Network, Ted Turner spoke to reporters in a crowded room near CNN headquarters to make the announce that they could "no longer hide the obvious bias in their news organization. "

"That freakin rat bastard Pat Caddell spilled the beans on the media and now we feel as if we should just be open about it" said Turner "We are going full Tilt Obama, 24/7"

"To  facilitate the truthfulness of our agenda," said Cogburn "we will release all current CNN talking heads to seek employment at a less bias media organ such as PBS."  

The New Lineup for the network promises to be straight forward Pro-Obama and leftist to the bone.

Left to Right- Martino, Krass, Schwartz, Leggman, Berkowitz, Dubue'

The new Prime Time line-up will consist of Prime Anchor Hairy Leggman , formerly of San Francisco bay area television news fame, former professor of journalism and the media at NYU and a expert on the leftist political scene. The Business News Team will be taken over by Gary "Kneecap" Schwartz, former SEUI treasurer and retirement consultant, known for his no nonsense approach to business, and Tess Berkowitz, Berkley O.W.S. organizer and former NYSE receptionist. Reporting on the National Weather, underground and above, will be popular weather babe, Randy Martino of Key West Florida's Gay Island Radio News. 

Senior Political correspondent for the network is to be Lillian Krass, former senior adviser to Senator John Edwards and right hand man to NY Representative Anthony Weiner. Her savvy inside backroom knowledge of Washington puts the network well ahead of it competitors on the issues of the day. Entertainment news brings Christopher "Chrissie" Dubue' to the team. Christopher is a Toni Award winner for his leading role in the Off-Broadway production of "Mame". Dubue' is personal friends with entertainers such as Madonna, Cher, Joy Behar, Alec Baldwin, Susan Sarandon and many others, and was appointed national co-chairperson of the Samuel L. Jackson "Wake the F**k up" campaign.

The only holdover from the previous lineup are to be Anderson Cooper, who will be the war correspondent for the Republican War on Women and the Middle Class, and Candy Crowley who, after the debates will be doing regular features on Health and Fitness.

CNN awaits a new day at the network, one of not hiding behind a phony shield, of pretending of being non- partisan. 

"Our Mission" said Cogburn, "is to get Barack Obama's ass reelected and do it with all the integrity we can muster here at the nation's leading news source."

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America's Newest Trend:

by Matthew N.
from The Lunatic Asylum

Alcoholic Enemas...

Experts: Alcohol Enemas are Extremely Dangerous.

"Thank God we have 'experts' to constantly remind us not to do that which seems obviously stupid. I'll bet the guy who came up with that self-evident little piece of handy advice was paid at least high six-figures.

It's a good thing we're sending our children off to college in record numbers, huh? This, Ladies and Gentlemen, is what some of you have saved for all of your lives. It is what you have sacrificed or deferred vacations, dental fillings, the occasional steak, knee-replacement surgery and new cars for. It is why you have indebted yourself for the rest of your natural life with second mortgages and school loans.

 All so your kids can go off to college, get a Master's Degree in Holistic Basketweaving (in only 7 years, too!), and in the meantime, discover new, exciting -- and dangerous -- things to stick up their backsides, or to do with alcohol, and preferably do both simultaneously. This is what most of you are paying nearly $60,000 a year for in the vain hope that your child will emerge from the college experience just slightly smarter than when they went in...."

Keep Reading

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Top 5 Lies Leftists Believe About Conservatives: Number 1

From a continuing series by
One of My Faves: Fuzzy Logic

Number 1: Conservatives Are RAAACIST homophobic Islamaphobic xenophobic misogynists. No commas, probably should use hyphens, though, as that’s the breathless, said-as-one-word description of us that they have in their tiny little brains. Wrapped up in this, of course, is the sense that we are drooling idiots who hate everyone who is unlike ourselves, toothless rednecks who shoot “others” on sight, a Bible-thumping God Squad intent on white supremacist isolationism. And they believe it. The “nuance” crowd, our supposed intellectual betters, have zero problem painting with broad brush every single conservative (though of course they are loathe to be so-stereotyped themselves).

I’ve thought about this post a lot, knowing it was coming, and have contemplated how I’ll approach it (a Fuzzy Rant seems so obviously in order, ya know?). I settled on a focus on the mindset behind it rather than debunking (yet again) the idiocy of this belief. After all, we know that we are not any of those things, with the possible exception of being Islamaphobic (that old “it’s not paranoia if ‘they’ really are out to get you” saw may be applicable here). But it’s hardly going to be a complete post without at least mentioning the flaws on the face of that assumption, right?

Before I do that, though, I want to take a few moments (paragraphs) to examine leftist “thought.......”

Keep Reading  for the red meat

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A Word to the Daily Poll Watchers

By Jamie J. 
Eye of Polyphemus

"I am not much of a poll watcher until after the debates when the candidates have had their last big shot at appealing to voters. The winner and loser does not usually become solidified until then. There is no point in paying much attention to polling prior to the debates accept to analyze the successes and failures of the respective campaigns. Even that is more of a concern for the campaigns themselves, but the polls around this time can show candidates’ supporters which way they need to prod their guy towards victory.

 For whatever influence said supporters actually have. I am in deep red South Carolina where Mitt Romney cannot lose and Barack Obama cannot win. Neither one o them cares what anyone in the palmetto state thinks. Perhaps you are in the same bright red or blue situation. The circumstances do give you a certain distance from the election as a whole. The primaries are the last close up glimpse of the presidential race we get remember Newt Gingrich running away with South Carolina/ That was a long time ago. With that in mind, appreciate high emotions regarding the campaign have given way to detached observation of reality in everything else I am going to write here.

Embrace the fact that polls are largely accurate. Romney and Obama are virtually tied in the national polls. National polls are a soft indicator, however. It is the swing state polls that really matter in a relatively even matched election like this one, and those show Obama with an advantage. Stop claiming that the methodology is biased or looking at ’alternate polls that show who really is in the lead.....look at the facts instead."

Read the Rest  

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Fishnet Friday

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