Monday, March 10, 2014
Sunday, March 9, 2014
North Korea Claims Lead In Energy Conservation
"Once again, the United States and Europe
are far behind North Korea"
by Freewood
are far behind North Korea"
A spokesman for the government of North Korea has responded to recent NASA photos taken from the International Space Station showing a nearly black North Korea by claiming the lead in global energy conservation.
"Once again, the United States and Europe are far behind North Korea. First, we vanquished the best basketball players the rest of the world has to offer. We humbled American basketball greats Cliff Robinson, Vin Baker, and Craig Hodges with our North Korean champions. And now we have set the global standard in energy conservation. Our Dear Leader’s efforts to save the planet are at the forefront as usual. We are number one!
Your own spy satellite pictures show the proof of how so many North Korean citizens have voluntarily chosen to turn off their many cutting edge electrical appliances such as 4D television watching machines. All North Koreans live a life of splendor but voluntarily conserve, unlike the rest of the wasteful west and worst Korea. Praise our Dear Leader!"North Korean per capita power consumption is indeed about 7% that of South Korea, and that figure is reduced to 0.03% when Kim Jung-un’s microwave is excluded.
Labels:
Middle Finger News service
Saturday, March 8, 2014
Ronald Reagan and His Six-Year-Old Pen Pal
And this was the man they said would blow up the world.....
On March 12, 1984, President Ronald Reagan was chatting with students at Congress Heights Elementary when he suddenly announced that he had chosen one of them to become his pen pal. The lucky winner was six-year-old Rudy Hines, who was picked because he had proven himself to be a good reader and writer.
The two wrote back and forth with surprising frequency, exchanging hundreds of letters until the end of Reagan's presidency in 1989. They covered topics you would expect, like reading ("Rudolph, if you get in the habit of reading stories for pleasure you'll never be lonely"), but also issues typically reserved for the political arena (Reagan lamented not getting to have a personal chat with Mikhail Gorbachev). The Gipper occasionally included some of the doodles for which he later became notorious and sent pictures of himself and the First Lady from their travels, always including a handwritten note on the back.
Rudy and his mom even had the Reagans over for dinner in their one-bedroom apartment on September 21, 1984 (pictured). Rudy told his pal Ron he could come over as long as he gave some warning first, so Rudy's mom had time to pick the laundry up off the floor. The Reagans were thrilled to accept, but had a condition of their own: that they eat the way Rudy and his mother ate every night. They ended up dining on fried chicken, rice, and salad in the living room while watching TV.
After Reagan passed away in 2004, Rudy recalled how impressed he was with the president for giving personal attention to a young child: "I figured I will get just a generic response that typical politicians give when people write letters to them. But he was not a typical politician. He actually sat down and took the time and carefully thought out his responses to my letters. And I really appreciated that."via Mental Floss
Russian Newspaper : Obama Birthers on Wrong Track
Uncovers Revealing Photo
Photo notation: Marvin & Barry 3rd grade 1969 Mars
"This could very well explain his effeminacy, lack of knowledge of language and inability to spell or speak fluently without a teleprompter.."
Friday, March 7, 2014
The Situation Room Gazebo
"FORE!"
During a briefing aboard Air Force One on the way to Florida, Deputy Press Secretary Josh Earnest ostensibly was making the point that Obama can monitor and handle world events from his gazebo at the Ocean Reef Club on Key Largo. W.H. Dossier
"I think the point is that the President over the course of a very busy week has maintained his schedule and his ability to monitor ongoing events in Ukraine. I would anticipate that he’ll do the same thing this weekend. And the fact of the matter is what the President is doing this weekend in Florida is essentially what the President will be doing if he stayed back at the White House. It’s just that the weather will be a little warmer." - Deputy Press Secretary Josh Earnest
Labels:
Foreign Affairs,
Turd King
Crazy Bernie Considers Run for the W.H.
The good people at Ricochet have come up with a platform for ol' Bernie to help kickstarter his campaign and paint on his Volkswagen campaign bus which include:
* All farm subsidies redirected towards the cultivation of patchouli.
* ObamaCare insurance coverage mandates revised to include heavier emphasis on healing crystals.
* As a cost-saving measure, "Hail to the Chief" now played at presidential events exclusively by Joan Baez on autoharp.
* Gay marriage legalized nationwide by executive order. Heterosexual marriage repealed in favor of "going wherever the wind takes you."
* Taking logical next step on sensible recommendation of Al Armendariz, EPA to begin utilizing actual crucifixions.
* Common Core revised to include section on "areas where Howard Zinn didn't go far enough."
* Abandoning traditional National Security Strategy document, grand strategy now formulated with "really chilled out vision board"
* Carbon emissions reduced by overhaul of national automobile fleet to foot-pedaled Flintstones vehicles.
* Every U.S. Army battalion staffed by at least one person responsible for placing carnations in gun barrels.
* NASA budget reallocated to fund nationwide astral projection project.Run Bernie, Run!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)