Kerry Seals Historic Non-Aggression Pact with Canada

"Peace in Our Time"

Despite the prospect of escalating war in the Middle East, the free world can breathe a little easily today with the signing of the North American Non-Aggression Pact between Canada and the U.S. in Ottawa Last Night.

(MFNS) Ottawa - "Peace in our time" declared U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry as he held a puppy tightly while standing next to a befuddled Canadian Minister of National Defense, Rob Nicholson and a small contingent of reporters outside the Royal Canadian Hall in Ottawa last night. 

"At last the specter of death and destruction that have held the people of our two great nations in the grip of fear and uncertainty has be exorcised" Kerry told the crowd. 

Later, the Canadian Ministry told MFNS  that Kerry's plane radioed he was on a secret mission and requested landing rights at a Royal Canadian Airbase. Kerry rushed to the Ministers side and began babbling  incoherently about an agreement between the two nations. 

"At first I though I was being punked, as you Americans call it, by some ridiculous late night program.  But it soon became apparent The Secretary was serious."

Nicholson told us Kerry "looked scary, haggard and somewhat out of his mind", ranting about conservative bloggers in the U.S. making fun of him, and that he "needed an earth shaking international agreement to show those bastards!"

"Just between us", Nicholson told us, "I suspected Secretary Kerry was still a bit ill from his recent butt fat injections or had been dipping into his wife's ant-psychotic medications, so we just played along with the whole thing for his benefit."

There has been no word from the White House, but when told of the agreement, Vice President Joe Biden said " this just proves John Kerry and former Secretary of State Hillary Swank made us a formidable team of diplomats  that understand the difficult workings of international affairs almost as much as I do, and with this agreement have brought peace to the Canadian Continent ."     

Middle Finger Theater - Last Hand Gun On Earth

A Firesign Theater Presentation  

WH Unveils First Lady's 50th Birthday Portrait

Fishnet Friday

Liberals Historically Think They Are Intellectually Elite

Why else would you see the majority of Democratic Presidents not surrounding themselves with the very people that keep the economy running and taxes coming in. 

Government produces nothing, private sector produces everything. Does it surprise you where Obama lands on the graph?

What we have here is a Dupe for a leader and

a failed leftist Affirmative Action experiment.

h/t Nod to the Gods

Biden Surfaces Long Enough to Replenish Foot-in-Mouth Supply........

God Bless Ya Joe

Washington Examiner:

"Vice President Joe Biden on Thursday thanked Ford Motor Company executive chairman Bill Ford Jr. “for saving our ass.” The vice president was referring to the 2008-2009 auto crisis, according to the pool report. 

Ford was the lone American automaker to not receive government bailout aid.

“Mark my words — not just in automobiles, but manufacturing coming back to America,” said Biden. “It's coming back because we have a legal system that protects people's contract rights, where intellectual property is protected.

Biden also predicted the revival of Detroit, home to the nation’s auto industry, and the largest American municipality to declare bankruptcy.

“This is not only an important city, but an iconic city,” said Biden. “It represents, symbolizes the manufacturing might of the United States of America all through the 20th century.....”

I guess Joe forgot about THIS. 

Leading Purveyor of Violent Movies Plans Anti-NRA Drama

Hollywood Hypocrisy

After making millions giving America a plethora of senselessly violent movies, film producer and studio executive, Harvey Weinstein, producer of such violent films as Reservoir Dogs,  Pulp Fiction,  Jackie Brown,  Kill Bill and Django Unchained announced on Howard Stern’s radio show that he and actress Meryl Streep are to make a full feature drama to try to destroy the National Rifle Association.

Weinstein: Mucho Dollars But Short on Sense 

Washington Times:

"Mr. Stern asked Mr. Weinstein on Wednesday whether he owned a gun. The Hollywood heavyweight replied that he did not and never would. “I don’t think we need guns in this country. And I hate it,” the producer said. “I think the NRA is a disaster area.”

Mr. Weinstein then revealed his secret project about the gun rights group. “I shouldn’t say this, but I’ll tell it to you, Howard,” he said. “I’m going to make a movie with Meryl Streep, and we’re going to take this head-on. And they’re going to wish they weren’t alive after I’m done with them.”

The shock jock asked whether the film was going to be a documentary. Mr. Weinstein said no, that it would be a “big movie like a ‘Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.’”

The movie mogul said his vision was to scare people away from firearms. He foresees moviegoers to leave thinking, “Gun stocks — I don’t want to be involved in that stuff. It’s going to be like crash and burn.”

Weinstein thinks guns are necessary for self-defense, but only in other countries, during genocides and if the weapon is not personally owned." 

The chairman of the Weinstein Co. (formerly Miramax) is one of President Obama’s biggest fundraisers. He brought in more than $500,000 from his Hollywood friends for the president’s re-election campaign and the Democratic National Committee in 2012."

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Ready America?

Obama Daughters Listed as ‘Senior Staff ’

Taxpayers Foot the Bill for Obama Girls Summer Africa Vacation

Conservative Angle

"A Freedom of Information Act request was submitted by Judicial Watch and the documents revealed a few things we never knew. The total trip was estimated to be greater than $424,000, and it seems that the Obama girls are catagorized as “Senior Staff ”.

Upon arriving , Senior Staff brief the President on the upcoming activities and official
US State Department directives in event of encounter with
horny giraffes or capture by cannibals

 Judicial Watch, the organization that investigates and fights government corruption, announced today that it has obtained mission expense records and passenger manifests from the United States Air Force related to the June 21-27, 2011, trip taken by First Lady Michelle Obama, her family and her staff to South Africa and Botswana. Judicial Watch obtained the documents pursuant to an August 19, 2011, Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) lawsuit (Judicial Watch v. U.S. Air Force (No. 11-1496). Judicial Watch is investigating the purpose and itinerary of the trip as well as a breakdown of the costs to taxpayers.

On June 28, 2011, Judicial Watch filed a FOIA request seeking the mission taskings, transportation records, and passenger manifests for Michelle Obama’s Africa trip. Documents were only provided after Judicial Watch filed suit.

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Queeen of All America Return Expected

After 3 weeks on vacation in Hawaii, including ten days without the other Royal Family members, The Queeen is expected to be In The House Wednesday. Holed up at BFF Oprah Winfrey’s fabulous pad on the island of Maui since her husband and their daughters departed on January 4, she is scheduled for an event Wednesday afternoon. Rumors among the little people of Royal discontent have been skillfully sidestepped here at home.

Nothing Says World Peace Like a Box of Potatoes.

John Kerry Goes Full Biden .......

When Secretary of State John Kerry met Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov in Paris on Monday ahead of peace talks on Syria scheduled for later this month, he thought he would break the ice with…potatoes.

Kerry said the potatoes came from Idaho, which he had recently visited.

Lavrov said the potatoes were “impressive.”