Tuesday, September 15, 2020

Columbia University Marching Band Self Euthanizes in the Name of Wokeness


Down With Oppressive Racist Marching Bands!

We seem to be living during one of history’s rare Idiot Extravaganzas.  So it's no surprise to me a story like this pops up.  It's been reported the Columbia University Marching Band issued a statement Saturday announcing it would dissolve after 116 years of performance due to intrinsic, irreparable damage caused by the club’s structure, which was 'founded on the basis of racism' and 'cultural oppression. Yeah, a marching band. 
“The Columbia University Marching Band apologizes for insult and injury victims have experienced as a result of actions perpetrated in its name. The Band has maintained a club structure founded on the basis of racism, cultural oppression, misogyny, and sexual harassment.”
The band was in limbo with the University’s athletics department, which stripped it of its university funding in 2019, and a year prior, Columbia College and and the School of Engineering and Applied Science also withdrew their funding from the band after it stormed a campus library in 2017. I guess if I had been marching for 116 years, I'd be tired, too.

All seriousness aside, readers might want to visit the band's Wikipedia page to see it's history of irreverent and sometimes offensive humor and satire. This could be a bit of performance art mocking the leftist insane culture of wokeness by the self-proclaimed "cleverest band in the world".  As is the case with a lot of the Ivy League marching bands, the group is usually focused on satire (often very crass), and not so much on marching.

After all they actually have to sit through Ivy League Football games. So to distract from the embarrassment, each week's performance featured a new script and new music. The band has had much more in common with the writer's room of a cable tv news satire show than with what most people think of as a marching band. At their best, such bands can be creative and funny, but at their worst, they're like pre-schoolers running around with kazoos and making fart jokes.

So quick, before the ruse is exposed let's hope the band also call for the dissolving of the Columbia Journalism School due to its foundation of teaching fake news and journo-fraud, and the School of Law for spitting out crooked ambulance chasers at this racist and cultural oppressive instution so we can watch the elitist heads explode. 

~ Thank You MJA@IOTWReport for the Linkage! ~

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