A Message from the Empress

< Message forwarded to Diogenes >
             for immediate release:

"I have recently been declared Empress of the World. Let us not waste time explaining why or how; let's all simply accept the fact that we are better off as a result; and hence, my first decree:

"Empress  Decree No. 1a - The Empress calls for an end to the improper use of the word “Hero.” A hero is a person who performs a heroic act (The Empress New Collegiate Dictionary, pg.332). While many people should, for instance, be deeply praised for choosing selfless and noble careers (firemen, for example) or for exemplifying great courage (surviving cancer, for instance) we will, henceforth, reserve the use of the word “hero” for those who have performed heroic acts. The fireman doesn't become a hero when he gets a position in the department; he becomes a hero when he saves a life. The cancer survivor doesn't become a hero for surviving cancer; they becomes a hero when they dedicate their life to raising money for cancer research."

"Nor does a soldier become a hero for simply donning a uniform, they become heroes for placing themselves in harms way for our freedom. And henceforth, no make-believe comic book fantasy characters shall be used to denigrate the true meaning of Hero by being referred to as such by anyone over the age of 12 years old.    

"There are many wonderful, important and praiseworthy people out there who are not heroes, and never shall be except in their own minds (insert any politician's name here) Heroes are a special category of wonderful people — unless, of course, we continue to call all wonderful people heroes."

"The Punishment: Those who continue to misuse this word will be required to wear their underwear on the outside of their pants, in public, and in addition shall be forced to attend Barack Obama rallies.

Now, go forth and obey.
< end message >

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Things aren't going well at Obama For America 2012 Headquarters these days.....

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No More Real Time Biden

Naked DC

I think We're Talking Damage Control Here

The press is being told that they are no longer allowed to Tweet Joe Biden’s commentary in real time. Remarks can be reprinted in their entirety later (even 20 minutes later), but on-the-scene reporting will be discouraged, according to White House sources.

The implication here is that Joe Biden does not deliver pre-written speeches as they are pre-written, as pre-written speeches could easily be sent to reporters ahead of time. Obviously, this means that you will no longer be able to experience real-time Joe Biden, which is a shame, particularly if you’re interested in such intriguing topics as Joe Biden’s parents’ sex lives, the unique characteristics of certain ethnic backgrounds, and complete reports on what Joe Biden had for lunch.

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If Nancy Pelosi had never become a Politican

iOTW.com
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Cause I Got Nothing Today

A repost from last year......

Obama Rejected by Dancing With the Stars 
Exclusive:

 Another Embarrassing Failure 

Middle Finger News Service - It was revealed to Diogenes today that President Obama failed a super secret audition for the the new season  of the popular television show 'Dancing with the Stars'. Officials with the highly rated program told us that the White House had requested the secret preliminary try-out as a way of boosting Obama's popularity rating with the American people. "Unfortunately, the guy can't dance either" a spokesperson for the show said, referring to Obama's handling of the economy.

For maximum viewer ratings, Obama was originally paired with 2008 election foe, the graceful Republican Sarah Palin. But Mrs.Palin later was said to say "This guy has three left feet! Go figure." She also told producers  "if they issued dancing licenses, his would be revoked for endangering the public safety!" The political friction showed in their first dance routine , a basic Foxtrot, in which Obama's moves were said by unnamed production staffers as "resembling a chicken on acid."

Obama was later paired with dancing star  Tameka McHughes, doing a classic disco number. "This guy was all over me." Ms. McHughes told us. "It was like prom night with Steve Urkel!"

At first, the White House initially denied the secret audition, but confronted with pictures, finally had to admit the embarrassing episode. No further comments were issued on the matter.

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A Good Monday Morning

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Puttin' Her Up On The Rack

Diogenes

As you can see, I've been busy this weekend making some major changes to DMF. I decided to go to a cleaner, less cluttered look to be easier on the eyes and render better on wide screen laptops and mobile devices most people use today. The page is a combination of a WordPress CSS and a standard Google Blogger page with a set of custom fonts, which I was told was impossible to do. I proved them wrong, but not without a few headaches. Only after an all-nighter, a bottle of Cabernet and a lot of hair pulling did I succeeded.

Some minor tweaks are left to be done, but after testing it renders fine in all the major browsers - Firefox, Chrome, Safari and the only one I use, the Opera browser ( if you're still using IE you are on your own there, I don't go near it ).  The formatting is 16pt. font for easy viewing ( I despise manufacturer's default 10pt. font ) so all I can say is it works fine and looks good from this end.

If you encounter anything about this page that is not right in looks or operation other than the sidebar loading after the main page, please email me and let me know.

No animals were harmed and no government assistance was required in this undertaking.
I made it happen Obama!

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It Must Be Tough Being Obama These Days....

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Fisher-Price Launches New Barack Obama Toys

The Spin Cycle

My First Teleprompter

 The Fisher-Price  Corporation, a leading manufacturer of children's educational toys, has announced a new line of toys designed to allow children to use their imagination and play at being Barack Obama, the current President of the USA. Two exciting and educational new Fun With Barack™ toys will be released later this summer, with several additional models being released before the Christmas shopping season.

The hope is that if children have these creative toys to play with, they can emulate their role model, and perhaps someday aspire to the same high level of achievement as President Obama has accomplished.

The first model in the Fun With Barack™ series will be My First Telepromter™ and will encourage small children to develop language skills. This toy will help children aged 3-8 to overcome their fear of public speaking and help prepare them for future careers in public service and politics.

The second model, to be released simultaneously, will be "Lets Play Golf!™"
This fun toy will allow children aged 5-10 to enjoy playing president by simulating President Obama's daily workload.

Let's Play Golf

 With this highly creative and entertaining toy, children can go out on their imaginary golf course (usually a back yard) and face the daily rigors of playing challenging holes and battling devious sand traps.


Their friends can play the roles of visiting foreign dictators, and they can schmooze them and negotiate disarmament deals that leave the USA virtually disarmed and helpless.
It will provide the perfect opportunity for them to play "Take Some Stimulus Money, The Taxpayers Won't Care."

The Lets Play Golf™ cart is powered by a 6 volt rechargeable battery and is Eco-friendly and appropriately recyclable so they can be "green."

The Fisher-Price Corporation is a subsidiary of Mattel Toys Inc. Five percent of the proceeds from the sale of these toys will go to the Barack Obama Reelection Committee.

The Spin Cycle.blogspot.com

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The History Revisionist are at it Again

Now they claim the Founder of the Boy Scouts was Gay

NYT's OP-ED 

"With more and more American institutions becoming inclusive and even openly gay-friendly, the Boy Scouts of America has just reaffirmed its unregenerate straights-only status: a special committee, formed in 2010, recently announced the organization's intention of sticking with the 2000 Supreme Court decision that it is within its constitutional rights to exclude gays from leadership roles. All this is richly ironic in view of the fact that the founder of the Boy Scouts, Robert Stephenson Smyth Baden-Powell (raised to the peerage as Lord Baden-Powell) was in probability a gay man himself — though closeted, of course, considering the circumstances." 

"A Victorian military hero who skyrocketed to fame after his valiant defense of the besieged city of Mafeking during the Second Boer War, Baden-Powell was one of the British Empire’s most adulated soldiers, looked to as the very model of muscular Christianity. Baden-Powell, the author of the hugely popular and influential “Scouting for Boys” (1908), inspired a national cult of manliness even as he entertained serious worry about his own sexuality....."

[SNIP]

History is being cherry picked for every hero, intellectual , creative mind or hand in history with an unusual marriage arrangement, that bore no children or remained unmarried, sometime with a close public confidant, and turned into a Rump Ranger Icon by revisionist with scant proof or no evidence at all. Perhaps these people were just smarter than we are.
Who shall it be next?

Keep reading if you can

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Obama Down Two in the Fourth Period.......

"If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help."


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Let’s open the discussion of potential felonies Mr. President.

Scotty Starnes 

Anyone Remember Obama’s Felony with

Joe Sestak/Andrew Romanoff Job Bribes?

So, Team Obama wants to slander Mitt Romney with false felony charge over Bain documents. I have a long list of laws Obama has broken with all his executive orders to not enforce the Defense of Marriage Act, No Child Left Behind Law, Immigration laws and Welfare Reform laws. But one that nobody seem to be pointing out is that Democrat Joe Sestak claimed Obama’s White House offered him a job if he didn’t run against Republican, turned Democrat, Arlen Spector. Spector’s switch gave Democrats a filibuster proof Senate.

Spector’s payoff for switching parties was to run unopposed and to make this happen, the White House offered Sestak a job bribe. Sestak slipped up and revealed the felony bribe, so the White House went into spin mode until eventually Bill Clinton saved them by admitting he was the go between that offered Sestak the White House proposed job. Clinton must have received a bribe himself because he also admitted he wasn’t the go between. No matter what the story is, it’s still unconstitutional (Article 2, Section 4) and a felony (18 U.S.C.Section 201) even if it was an “indirect” bribe (18 U.S.C. Section 600).

There was no investigation into the admitted job bribe due to the Democrat controlled House Judiciary Committee blocking it.

Then we had the Andrew Romanoff job bribe. Team Obama, led by Obama puppeteer Jim Messina, offered Romanoff a job with USAID, if he didn’t run against Obama-supported Michael Bennett for the Senate seat.

Obama-crony, Eric Holder, refused to investigate these admitted felonies

Then we have the Romanoff job bribe.

There’s a long list of bribes associated with the ObamaCare law. The Cornhusker Kickback and the Louisiana Purchase are just a few examples of bribes that were used by Team Obama. Obama approved the bribes.

Last time I checked, offering bribes is a felony. Ask Obama’s buddy Rod Blagojevich. Another felonious bribe scandal involving Obama.

So, let’s open the discussion of potential felonies Mr. President.

scottystarnes.wordpress.com 

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