Monday, June 16, 2014

BREAKING: GM Plans Recall of Every Car Every Built

(MFNSDetroit - Due to todays newest recall of GM autos and  the furious amount of recalls of General Motor's products in resent months, our sources have been told GM is working on a plan to recall and buy back all vehicles ever made by the giant automaker.

GM executives are in talks with the Obama administration for permission and resources to undertake the largest buy back of a consumer product in history.  The United Auto Workers Union today enthusiastically said they are on board 100%.

United Auto Workers Union President Bob King
Bob King, UAW president told us " thanks to the suckers...uh... the American taxpayers for bailing out GM and our over-payed, ridiculously compensated and bloated retirement plans in the past....I'm confident they will lay out the cash and do it again in this plan buyback. Hey, sometime we have a bad year here and there and build really shitty cars. It happens."

GM's plans are to recall all cars and reimburse the owner on a pro-rated basis of between 85 to 100% of the vehicles original price. The credit for the reimbursement will go towards GM's newest creation, the futuristic "Peoples Car".

 The People's Car - 2015 Baracko

The new 'Baracko' is GM's latest creation and is said to be a 100% safe crash proof electric automobile, designed with state-of-the-art 21st century vacuum tube instrument technology, and with a total of only 9 moving parts for reliably and low maintenance.

Being a true 'People's Car' it will be personalized to the owners ethnicity by being issued in the colors Black ,White, Half-Black, Red, Yellow, Brown, and for those Gay Americans wanting to fly their freak flag, it also comes in a Rainbow Motif.

DEVELOPING....

5 comments:

  1. Bwah hah hahhhh! Bob Lutz really made a statement kinda like that once. Speaking of the notoriously disposable Chevy Vega, which he had tried to make into an innovative sports coupe, he said: "You know, we really didn't just wake up one morning and decide to build the shittiest car in the world. It just happened that way."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There is a guy who lives down the lake shore from me that still drives a Vega. He said he keeps it because it reminds him of his second wife. It smokes, it's high mileage and makes a lot of noise.....

      Delete
    2. That's pretty funny, but keeping a Vega is a lot of masochism just for a good punch line. It's not like you can drive it. Unless you add oil faster than it pools up on your driveway. And even if you don't move it, you still need to clean up the piles of rust and scattered parts that fall off periodically.

      Delete
  2. Where can I get me one? Actually, I'm not real happy. All we have is made by GM.

    ReplyDelete
  3. 2015 Baracko

    Since when did GM start making cars that look like Mooshell's @$$?

    ReplyDelete

ALL ANONYMOUS COMMENTS GO STRAIGHT TO THE SPAM FILTER.