Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Who Cares If Your Not Time's Person of the Year When You're Moses

After failing to take the White House, a place she felt she deserved, Hillary Clinton has lost out on another honor that was supposed to be hers. Time Magazine has named Donald Trump “The Person of The Year.” And while the President-elect was named the most influential person of 2016, you wouldn’t know it by the accompanying article. Left-leaning Time slams Trump as a “huckster” and a “demagogue,” reserving all of the praise for Hillary who they call “an American Moses.”
Time loves Hillary Clinton so much and it kills them that she lost the election. It’s surprising that they didn’t go ahead and name her POTY anyway, but they more than made up for it in her profile. The magazine excuses all of Hillary’s failings, blaming a media that hasn’t been fair to her. All of this culminates with this puke-inducing assessment:
"In her 1969 commencement address to her class at Wellesley College, Clinton called politics “the art of making what appears to be impossible possible.” In this, she has succeeded. Like an American Moses, she was an imperfect prophet, leading women to the edge of the Promised Land. Now it’s up to another woman to enter it."
Well, they are kind of right about Hillary making the impossible possible. No one gave Donald Trump a snowball’s chance in Hell of winning the presidency, but thanks to Hillary’s terrible campaign and overall scumminess, he’s the President-elect.
As for the Moses thing? Not so much. Moses led the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt to the Promised Land. Along the way, he escaped the Pharaoh’s army by parting the Red Sea. In order for this to be an appropriate analogy, Moses would have led the Israelites from the Promised Land into bondage in Egypt. Also, there would have been no roadblocks along the way and Moses would still have managed to find a way to screw it up.
Had Hillary won the presidency, there would have been another similarity: she would have unleashed a wave of plagues across the land. Instead of water into blood, frogs, lice, flies, disease, boils, hail of fire, locusts, darkness, and infant death, Hillary would have brought liberalism, progressivism, socialism, fascism, cronyism, hypocrisy, corruption, deceit, rape, and bullshit raining from the sky. We would have envied Egypt.  
The only similarities between Moses and Hillary are that they are both old and have wandered around aimlessly for 40 years.
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