Thursday, March 8, 2012

On Condoms and Catholics....

By Matthew@The Lunatic's Asylum
RE: The recent tempest regarding the ObamaCare mandates on birth control vis-à-vis religious institutions.

I'm still waiting for someone to tell me that Muslim religious institutions must comply with the law, too. There has been a curious silence on this matter. One would either expect that any Muslim negatory response would come with an ostentatious explosion, or since one has been lacking, that another 'secret' deal has been brokered behind the scenes which exempts the Exploding People from this provision of ObamaCare.

I'm also waiting to hear from all those Left-wing retards who screamed about the draconian threats to personal liberties and privacy that were embodied in the Patriot Act to explain why it is that the government should respect a terrorist's right to privacy, vis-a-vis wiretapping in order to prevent a mass murder, and that it should have the right to drag people's sexual lives into the light of day and infringing upon people's right of conscience in order to score a cheap political point on behalf of a walking-wounded President who hasn't got the proverbial snowball's chance in hades to be re-elected.

I'm not expecting to hear anything especially logical or coherent on either account, so there's no point in waiting for answers.

 A few words about birth control, which Muslims have been practicing since 632 AD -- only now with explosives and televised beheadings...oh, sorry, this isn't about Muslims, and I seem to have gone slightly off track. My apologies.

The argument in favor of requiring religious institutions to provide birth control against their core tenets first began as a matter of 'access'. When that argument fell flat, it became a matter of 'fairness' and economic inequality, and when those arguments, in turn, failed to pass the smell test, it became an issue of 'women's health'.

Birth control and abortion – which is really what the Obamatards want churches to pay for – is hardly ever about anyone’s health, let alone a woman’s. It certainly is never about a child’s health, since the child is purposely killed. It is also not about “access to affordable birth control” as a walk through your local high school, CVS, Walgreens or Wal-mart will demonstrate. Everywhere one goes, birth control is being openly sold, or given away free-of-charge, so this obviates the “availability” concern.

Then again, your typical Libtard wouldn’t be caught dead in a CVS or Wal-Mart, so they probably don’t know that you can walk right into one, buy a box of Trojans, and then walk right out.

The truth is that the number of medically necessary abortions – those that are necessary to save a mother’s life, or prevent a long-term debilitating injury – is really rather small. I don’t have an exact figure on that, but it really is minuscule. Another truth about pregnancy is that it is an easily avoidable condition, and there can be no argument made to the contrary, excepting a criminal act or stupidity.

A walk through my local pharmacies told me what I already knew, but I’ll recite the list of things I’ve confirmed for the benefit of the truly dense and mentally challenged:

Condoms abound. Not only were the condoms typically displayed in colorful cases that draw attention, they were usually stocked under a huge, hanging sign that read “Family Planning”, “Birth Control” and a few other euphemisms. If you can’t see them, then you aren’t looking. There were also, on average, about 20 different brands or kinds on sale, often in clearly-labeled boxes that told you all you needed to know: extra-long, extra-wide, ultra-thin, lubricated, spermicide-coated, ribbed, French Tickler, and so on and so forth.

And guess what? They all came in packages of at least three, often as many as 12, unless you want to splurge and go for the 24 pack. Prices began at somewhere in the $6-for-three range, and got as high as $40 for the larger kits (no pun intended).

Of course, buying condoms is often left to men, and they might not be up for the program because most men are dumber than dogshit when it comes to getting some. Precautions usually fly out the window when it comes to sexual self-control, and God forbid some woman should insist that a man wrap that rascal before making the beast with two backs, because…well, then he won’t call you the next day, or “friend” you on Facebook or some other weak excuse that women use these days to not to protect themselves, and avoid personal responsibility.

So, just because you may not be able to depend upon the man in your life to do the right thing, sitting right next door to the condoms is an entire range of other contraceptive methods. Sponges, diaphragms, contraceptive foams, all in marked boxes that make their purpose unmistakable to anyone with a third-grade reading proficiency. The prices are a bit higher than those charged for condoms, but it still doesn’t break the bank. If you have $25 or so, you can be prepared when Loverboy ain’t.

Now, if someone wants to tell me that protecting herself against an unwanted pregnancy that later requires an expensive abortion is a simple matter of economics, then please explain to me how it is that readily available precautions that cost between $6 and $40 are too big a financial burden for you to shoulder in 21st-Century America? And why is it that your insurance company, and your church, should have to pay for it? Why aren’t you sticking a crowbar in your own wallet and handing over that mere pittance yourself?

Oh, right. Because that would leave you with less money for shoes, crack, People Magazine, cosmetics and all the other shit you girls waste money on, and also leave you with the unfair handicap of having to take personal responsibility for your actions. Not to mention cutting into your reality televison time.

Just in case you’ve missed it, that last passage was pure sarcasm.

Now let’s look at one of the more expensive programs of birth control that I have a personal, and recent, experience with.

My own girlfriend, the beloved Tess Trueheart, went and got herself one of them new-fangled implant thingies that supposedly keeps her from getting pregnant for up to three years. Primarily, this works by injecting a steady supply of hormones into her bloodstream, making her an often-unapproachable hellion with a hair-trigger temper that you wouldn't approach without body armor, so I guess it works as intended.

However, when the mood swings pass (mercifully, they do), she’s ready for action and we both sleep soundly knowing we (probably) won’t be hearing the pitter-patter of little Lunatic feet anytime soon. I did not want her to have this implant at all; it requires minor surgery (15 minutes in her gyno’s office), and comes with some serious side effects (like bleeding, blood clots, acne, mood swings, and others). I did not need for her to have this done; she decided that it was what she wanted. The whole procedure cost less than $150, and her insurance picked up a portion of it (in New York state, insurance carriers are already required to pay for birth control and fertility treatments, which makes the ObamaCare mandate both redundant, and ridiculous).

The only difficulty was the day of the procedure, when the implant area (in her arm) hurt like hell. In a day or two, the swelling decreased, the pain and bruise faded, and six weeks later we could do all of the carefree horizontal dancing we desired.

Now, if you’re going to tell me that 15 minutes in doctor’s office, $150 dollars, and a six-week waiting period is too steep a price to pay for contraception, then perhaps there’s something wrong with you…or maybe you just have an agenda that you just can’t talk openly about. Considering that most Left-wing inspired agendas are typically stupid, laughable, contradictory, and oppressive, this probably explains why it is the Obama Administration and it’s allies finds itself in such a quandary; they can’t speak clearly and openly about the subject because to do so gives the real agenda away.

Which in this case was to attack one of the few institutions that hasn’t rolled over to the power of the state, or become it’s knowing ally, i.e. the Church. Obama’s brand of “social justice”, much like Communism and Islam, cannot abide a rival system of thought or behavior. Such systems must always be attacked, undermined, ridiculed, hounded, threatened, subverted, so as to make their arguments against the Socialist Utopia seem the opposite of what they really are. In this case, the Church must be made to appear to be misogynistic, anachronistic, hostile, stern, Old Fashioned, and restrictive to those who simply want to have a good time, free of consequence, shame, guilt or judgement.

This lack of a feeling of responsibility on behalf of the citizen is a prerequisite for tyranny. Obama, and politicians like him, cannot operate in an environment where people actually care and are held to a higher standard, whether legal or moral. Therefore, any individual or institution which claims to stand for a higher principle must be destroyed or weakened. This whole thing is not about anyone's health or lack of access to birth control; it's about power, pure and simple, and how one uses it to subvert yet another obstacle to Obama's Socialist Utopia.

The fact that no one on the Pro side can make an argument for requiring a religious institution to provide birth control against it’s own central tenets without resorting to a smokescreen of bullshit issues is proof positive that the announced aims -–fairness, access, women’s health – have absolutely nothing at all to do with the mandate.

Crossed posted from The Lunatic's Asylum


  1. Thanks for the cross-posting, DS! Much appreciated.

    A note to readers: regular readers of my blog will tell you that I am no fan of organized religion -- I find religion to be almost as big a scam as Social Security, and think that people who believe in a Higher Power, sans evidence, need help.

    However, this is not to say that I begrudge such organizations the right exist, and to espouse positions/doctrines that I might disagree with. So long as they aren't calling for mass genocide and war, they have every right to stand by and for what they believe in. Do not construe my post as a defense of the Catholic Church, specifically, nor Christianity in general, as I have personal issues with both.

    Even if I hapen to agree with them on matters of Abortion.

    My objection to the Obama Birth Control Mandate has nothing to do with religion, and everything to do with defense of Constitutional principles, with a healthy dash of cynicism as to the motivations of those who consider such principles to be either flexible or unnecessary, as their idiological stupidity requires.


    Chief Lunatic-in-Residence
    The Lunatic's Asylum

  2. I agree completely that the issue of the Obama mandate including contraception/abortafacients in a health insurance plan is first and foremost about the constitutionality of such a mandate. The left is pushing hard to frame the issue as a woman's right to health care in order to make it an emotional plea to women. Republicans need to expose this continuing misdirection for what it is, an attempt to suborn the Constitution for purely political partisanship.