Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Retail Artificial Intelligence and Your Future Robot Overlords

Before Uber Billionaires like Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk and the Google Dudes board SpaceX and fly away to the safety of their futuristic mansions on Mars and leave us in the charge of our Artificial Intelligence Robot Overlords, some work here is still to be done. Musk is left to convince us life will be wonderful without fossil fuels as we drive our electric cars to the solar energy powered fully automated veterinarian office to have Fluffy nurtured and obedience brain chip installed. And Bezos and his journalist playtoys are not through convincing us Donald Trump is the devil, and Jeffrey hasn't yet cornered the market on retail sales and just about everything you will need to survive in the future.

Amazon didn’t acquire the iconic grocery retail brand Whole Foods just for the quinoa: Whole Foods operates hundreds of retail data mines, and Amazon just married a world-class artificial intelligence team with one of the best sources of consumer shopping data in the U.S. There are lots of reasons why Amazon would want to spend $13.7 billion on Whole Foods, and with one big check, it will now control more than 400 sources of prime data on consumer behavior.

Artificial Intelligence models will dictate how and where products are sold in the next decade, and there are only a few companies with the expertise and data sets necessary to build those models at scale. Years down the road, if you frequent an established but aging grocery brand, say Safeway or Kroger, you’ll either watch Amazon eat their lunch with improved efficiency and incredible reach, or you’ll become an Amazon Web Customer because you’ll need their retail products to survive.

Amazon 1998 - Hello. We sell books, but Online. 
Amazon 2028 - Please return to your Primehouse for your nightly Primemeal, valued Primecitizen.

In the meantime, the Google Dudes recently went on an A.I. spending spree and purchased the Super Artificial Intelligence Company "Deepmind" in order to develop what they called a "Cybernetic Friend". The company’s purchase of "Boston Dynamics" sparked concern about why a search engine tech company needs a robotics maker. (that's a comforting thought, no?)

And Elon Musk launched his successful private cost-efficient rocket program, away from the wasteful gov jobs program called NASA, in hopes to eventually inhabit the Red Planet. "One reason we needed to colonize Mars—so that we’ll have a bolt-hole if A.I. goes rogue and turns on humanity." He has suggested implantable chips to treat brain disorders and one day, perhaps help protect the rest of us left behind from Evil Robot Overlords.

So the day may come Primecitizen, when your A.I. Robot Overlords deliver your predetermined A.I. approved evening meal by drone drop on your front porch as you drive home pass the abandon neighborhood grocery or brick and mortar retail outlet that now shelters illegal immigrants fleeing non-existent global warming catastrophes. 

...and don't forget to test your brain chip regularly and keep your Amazon Prime Tattooed Member Number on your hand clean and visible.

H/T Crazy Cousin Olivia for the Research