Friday, July 22, 2022

Oh No! CNN's New Chief Said To Be Trying To Woo Our Squinty & Meat Puppet

CNN’s new Chief Chris Licht is rumored to allegedly be in in “secret talks” to poach MSNBC mainstays Squinty Joe Scarborough and Meat Puppet Brzezinski away from the network according to a report in Radar Online. Licht was formerly executive producer of MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” and is interested in hiring Joe and Mika as part of his overhaul of a failing CNN.

Both Scarborough and Brezezinski have contracts running through the end of the year and it’s unclear how Joe and Mika would fit into the overall strategy of the CNN's boss valiant attempt at doing hard news. (insert laugh track here)

It looks to me Licht is going for ratings rather than a hard news approach for now because Squinty and Meat Puppet, while highly rated, have forgotten what hard news is and are just MSNBC's morning kickoff of the network's day long lunatic anti-Trump rantings.

I think Licht is barking up dead wood here considering the new digs would entail all new staff. Mika would have to find a new Botox source and concrete expert to apply her makeup, and Joe a new hair stylist to mess his hair ever morning. And what about their sidekick, lil' 'Willie the Pip', who takes over the show while Mika grabs a vodka and a Marlboro, and Joe slams a door on his nuts for motivation for his daily angry rant.

I mean they have all these cool graphic done just for them and they don't have to go any where near Tater Stelter. And what about their usual guest commentators like the mumbling twins, WaPo columnist Eugene Robinson and Al Sharpton, and bulbous head Max Boot and the bitter old witch, disgraced Sen. Claire McCaskill, or those pervert Lads from the Lincoln Project? They can't take them all with them!

Unless there is enough monetary motivation to throw their long time friends overboard for a new gig, I'm not seeing it. Unless the steadily decomposing Andrea Mitchell is to much the endure, why bail from a leaky boat onto a sinking ship?   

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