Kim Jong Un Blames Decadent U.S. For North Korean Food Shortage

MFNS Nork Bureau / Hana Ho - The Democratic People Republic of Korea State News Agency has told North Korean citizens to brace themselves for another "arduous march" forward in revolution' during which "we will have to chew the roots of plants once again".  Warning of impending food shortages, they asked the North Korean people to sacrifice for the good of the revolution.  

In a statement issued from the palace of Kim Jong Un and broadcast nationwide on television watching machines, the blame was laid directly on the United States.

"The decadent Imperialist United States and it's Big Eared Warmongering Leader, Hussein Obama, who has encouraged gluttony and immorality among people of the U.S. and the West, have consumed the entire world's food supply, including the seeds that sow in the abundantly rich fields of the Peoples Republic of Korean.

And because of the foolish actions of the United States and it's leaders by building mass supplies of military weapons to threaten war against the people of the DPRK, they have driven themselves into bankruptcy and can no longer afford to bargain for the worlds only supply of rich agricultural fertilizer produced by the great industrious people of DPRK.

Capitalism is a failure!  The west is Ripe for a Peoples Revolution! So we must remain strong in our coming "Arduous March"!  Therefore, Dear Leader Kim Jong Un orders that you forward 2 pounds of your rice supply to Pyongyang every month, starting immediately!"

As proof of the hardships experienced in the west, they included this documentary of the appalling circumstances in the U.S: 



(H/T Will Profit &Co. for Video) 

Never Get Between a Cop and His Donuts...

Philadelphia, Pa — An ex-transit cop has been found guilty of false imprisonment and official oppression stemming from a Christmas Day incident when he stepped on a woman's foot and refused to apologize after cutting in line at Dunkin’ Donuts in 2013. When the woman attempted to alert the officer's superiors, he slammed her head into an ATM machine, and placed her under arrest.

Douglas Ioven, a former officer with the Southeastern Pennsylvania Transit Authority (SEPTA), cut in line in front of Muibat Williamson, a nurse at Einstein Medical Center, who was on her way home from a night shift. When Ioven was leaving, with coffee and doughnuts in hand, he stepped on Williamson’s foot.

In testimony about the 2013 row, reported philly.com, Williamson said she confronted the officer and demanded he apologize,  but Ioven refused. An argument ensued, and an unnamed witness said she even inserted herself between the pair to remind them of the holiday. She overheard Ioven tell Williamson, 

“Next time, move out of the way.”

During two days of testimony last week, a retired SEPTA police sergeant told the jury that, after the incident, Ioven told him,

"I think I screwed up because I thought she was a homeless person, but she was a regular person. "

So much for the City of Brotherly Love. 

To Compare the Two Parties at This Time in Our History is to Indulge in False Equivalency

"The sins you perceive in Democrats are the usual ones — misguided policies, ill chosen means for dubious ends, and the normal complement of rhetorical dishonesty and political squalor. However mistaken you may find Clinton and Sanders on the issues, their debate is addressed to the world as it exists and therefore open to a sensible critique. The squalor to which the GOP has sunk, an alternate reality rooted in anger and mendacity, transcends mere differences in policy, threatening the country with profound, perhaps irreparable, damage.

This is not simply about Donald Trump. For Trump is not the result of forces which will come and go, but of a deterioration within the Republican Party that has been accelerating for years. The GOP has become a Frankenstein monster, assembled from dysfunction, demagoguery, myopia and myth, nurtured in a fever swamp where lies and hysteria kill off reason. Nothing better will arise until you help drive a stake through its heart." -Richard North Patterson, Novelist and Republican

Trump Threatens Louisiana on the Twitter With His Legions of Sleazy Lawyers

After claiming to have been shut out of important Republican National Convention committee slots in Louisiana, Donald Trump’s campaign argued on Monday that the posts were chosen at a “secret meeting” to which Trump delegates weren’t invited. Trump adviser Barry Bennett told MSNBC an interview Monday:  

“The problem we’re having here is that there was a secret meeting in Louisiana of the convention delegation, and apparently all of the invitations for our delegates must have gotten lost in the mail.”  

Bennett also said during the TV interview that the Trump campaign’s “legal team” will try to decertify Louisiana’s delegates. Trump late Sunday threatened on Twitter that there was a “lawsuit coming” against someone in Louisiana.

Just One Big Problem: Mr. Trump’s two Louisiana state co-chairmen both attended the “secret meeting” which was in fact a gathering at the Louisiana state GOP convention March 12, according to Jason Dore, the state party’s executive director. Dore said the state party held its election for delegation committee posts in accordance with state party rules, which were implemented and published online in 2015.

Trump got his legal delegates, his  whining real issue are the votes from five delegates awarded to Florida Sen. Marco Rubio, who has since suspended his campaign, and five other unbound delegates. Both the Rubio delegates and the unbound delegates are free to vote for any candidate at the Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

This is an attempt create controversy in his favor. But what Mr. Trump fails to understand is the Louisiana GOP are also  themselves a pack of sleazy Lawyers, and are well versed on the underbelly of politics he seems to lend himself to lately.

(WSJ)

John Kerry Cringes at GOP’s Perception Overseas

Our Honorable Doofus of State

Secretary of State John Kerry said on national television the Republican Party is an embarrassment to the United States because of the recent rhetoric that’s hailing from the GOP presidential campaign trail.  He mentioned specifically in an appearance on CBS's “Face the Nation” that the talk among some Republicans about barring Muslim entry into the country, or policing Muslim-dominated neighborhoods in America, or waterboarding those captured by U.S. intelligence officials, are all proving "an embarrassment to our country. It' upsets people's sense of equilibrium about our steadiness, about our reliability."

"Everywhere I go, every leader I meet, they ask about what is happening in America. They cannot believe it. I think it is fair to say that they're shocked. They don't know where it’s taking the United States of America."

Kerry, who also defended President Obama’s stay in Latin America both during and after the Brussels terrorism attack, a decision that sparked criticism from many in the Republican camp and among the media, for the public relations message it sent, then said the optics of the GOP campaign don’t look good on the international stage.

Seeing Mr. Kerry has spent most of his tenure dealing making concessions to our enemies, and his predecessor did much else but sip cocktails with world leaders while the Middle East fell into chaos, rather then projecting the power of the United States, we can only believe the "Leaders" he speaks of believe the U.S. is not as "Enlightened" as them. And our enemies see us as weak.

Yes Mr. Kerry, you and your predecessor over the last 7 years have projected nothing but weakness in negotiations and actions, and set the bar so low that when Mr. Trump and Mr. Cruz speak from a position of strength and power in domestic and foreign affairs, it's hard for foreign governments to believe, and it's scares them......as it should. 

A Good Monday Morning

Delta Force Units Training for January 20, 2017 Mission

"Watch Out Men, She's Got a Sniper Rifle"

MFNS - Middle Finger News Service has confirmed rumors that have swirled for weeks in the military community of the training of special forces units for a secret mission, slated for inauguration Day 2017.  Lt. General Ward Hawk of 1st Special Forces Operational Detachment Central Command (Delta) told MFNS the Pentagon has given the green light to special training of Delta Force Commando Units.

The mission (code named unknown) came about because of intelligence gathered recently by White House Military Personal of a disturbing private conversion overheard between two White House residents. 

In a tape of a loud and spirited conversation recorded in the White House family residence, Marion 'Moms' Robinson, Mother of First Lady Michelle Obama, reportedly told her daughter she felt slighted after reading the false reports in a fake news source, The Boston Tribune, and spread by idiot bloggers that Moms Robinson was to receive a $160,000 publicly funded retirement.  During the same conversation Mrs. Robinson was angrily heard to say she was "under no circumstances" leaving the White House after Mr. Obama's term is up:

"I know that big eared nigga I told you not to marry is gonna take my daughter and grand babies off to live in the lap of luxury in Hawaii and send my ass back to an old folks home in that crime ridden Chicago! NO MA'AM....ain't gonna happen! I ain't moving out........I ain't going nowheres. THIS PLACE IS MY REPARATIONS!" Uh Huh.

First Lady and Moms Robinson in Cuba

General Hawk told us the commando units are training for the dangerous mission to forcefully remove Moms Robinson from her luxurious, private third floor White House apartment she has occupied  free of charge since the inauguration of Barrack Obama in 2009. Due to the dangers of a Urban warfare mission of this type, volunteers were asked to step forward. When none did, orders were issued to assign volunteers from the elite Delta Force commando ranks. 

Word is that the Navy Seals will also train for a like mission at the Navel Observatory, the residence of the Vice president,  just in case the Joe Biden barricades himself in a closet. 

Truth Everlasting

"He is not here; He has risen,  just as He said."

                                                                                        Matthew 28:6

Obama Considering Another Possible Opportunity to Apologize for America

Hiroshima Peace Memorial

Obama considering visit to Hiroshima: Official

Yahoo News

(AFP) - The White House is considering a possible visit by President Barack Obama to Hiroshima, the Japanese city devastated in history's first atomic bombing at the close of World War II, a US official told AFP.  The official, who asked not to be named, said the details of Obama's visit to Japan for a Group of Seven summit in late May had yet to be finalized, but a trip to Hiroshima had not been ruled out.  Obama is scheduled to participate in the summit of leading democracies in central Japan's Mie prefecture.

In 2008, then-House speaker Nancy Pelosi visited Hiroshima, becoming the highest, sitting US political figure to visit the city.

Japan has long urged world leaders to visit Hiroshima and Nagasaki to see the horrors of the atomic bombings and join efforts to eradicate nuclear arms. Yoshihide Suga, the Japanese government's top spokesman, refrained from directly commenting on the reports, but reiterated Tokyo's position.

"The government has always called on leaders around the world to visit Hiroshima and Nagasaki to see for themselves the reality of atomic bombings.  We believe visits are important to boost international momentum toward achieving a world without nuclear arms." 

Washington will make its final decision after a planned trip to Hiroshima by US Secretary of State John Kerry for a meeting of the G7 foreign ministers on April 10-11.

On August 6, 1945, the US dropped the world's first atomic bomb on Hiroshima, killing about 140,000 people. Three days later, the US military dropped a plutonium bomb on the port city of Nagasaki, killing some 74,000 people.

The bombings are controversial in the United States, where opinion remains divided over whether their use in the closing days of World War II was justified.

____________________________________________

Lets just hope Big Ears remembers where and who started the whole episode in history that led to the Hiroshima Memorial, and the complete and final defeat of those who chose to come against you, and he chooses to keeps his mouth shut!
 

U.S. State Dept. Will Award You $1.5 Million to Pen a “TV Drama” Helping Combat Islamic Radicalization

Sec.of State John Kerry, The Earl of Ketchup-Duke of Heinz

Secretary of State John Kerry (he fought was in Vietnam Ya Know) will travel to Belgium this week to extend the American peoples' condolences to the citizens of Brussels, and probably to help counter the problematic public relations the White House is facing after our President was pictured tangoing the night away in Argentina rather than attending to important things, like people getting blown up in Europe.

But, fear not, America and our allies, because the State Department has a plan. Announced yesterday, they are now offering a $1.5 million grant to anyone who can pen a television drama series that can counter radicalization in the Middle East.

"This grant will fund the development and broadcast of a television drama series in which young people grapple with everyday frustrations and lack of opportunity, while growing and learning through new experiences," the offer said.

"The drama will be grounded in reality, but will also contain compelling creative content (i.e. storytelling, resonant narratives, strong characters, sophisticated production, etc.)," it added. "In short, it will strive to be entertaining while challenging viewers to engage in critical thinking by placing characters in situations where they are faced with a choice: support universal values of tolerance and peace or be drawn into the dark world of extremism."

The grant explains that the show needs to be inspiring, and that the characters need to be relatable, so that potential jihadis, hanging around watching television dramas in their spare time between training on the Internet to build bombs, will be able to identify with the young people on screen and see them as "role models" for how to handle the deep and permeating sadness in their soul without strapping on a suicide vest.

Now, honestly, outreach-through-entertainment isn't a horrible idea. After all, after a motorbike, a satellite dish is the most popular "disposable income" purchase even in the third world. And America produces a hell of a lot of television, unfortunately mostly starring people with the last name "Kardashian," that reinforces our status as the world's Great Satan. But it might be too little too late to start drafting Shonda Rhimes into our national security efforts, now that plans are underway to incorporate thousands more refugees into western countries, after they've all been trained in the finer points of C-4 laced apparel-making.

Any question why these people have no fear of us what so ever?

(Grants.gov Link)

This Week in WTF Science News

Sorry, Mr.Obama, The Jokes Aren't Funny Anymore

Opposing Views

On March 12, The New York Times turned the clock back five years to an overlooked moment that may have been the beginning of Donald Trump's bid for the White House. It was the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner, the annual event that reminds regular Americans just how cozy the press is with the government it's supposed to cover in an adversarial manner. In 2011, many of the journalists in the room were still star-struck, still convinced that President Barack Obama was the transformative figure who'd end political divisiveness and usher in the era of Hope and Change.

Wearing a bow tie and a mischievous grin, Obama took a warm-up dig at Mitt Romney -- his eventual opponent in the 2012 race -- before spending the next four minutes mocking Donald Trump, who was sitting in the audience.

"Say what you will about Mr. Trump," Obama said, "he certainly would bring some change to the White House."

Then the president pointed toward a projector screen, showing a crudely Photoshopped White House with a garish vertical extension topped by Trump's name and bright purple neon. That joke followed earlier jabs about Trump's "birther" skepticism.

"No one is happier, no one is prouder to put this birth certificate matter to rest than The Donald," Obama said, "and that's because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter, like, 'Did we fake the moon landing?' 'What really happened in Roswell?' And 'Where are Biggie and Tupac?'"

The journalists in the room laughed as if Obama were Louis CK, and Trump smiled and waved as the crowd looked for a reaction.

As the Times notes, Obama is still laughing, and still taking digs at the Republican front-runner. But as Trump stands on the verge of a major party nomination for the presidency, his campaign is no longer the joke most people thought it was. Obama himself might be the one responsible for turning the idea of a Trump presidency from a joke to a serious goal for the real estate magnate, who by all accounts craves approval and credibility.

Obama might be the last person snickering, and that's probably not going to do him -- or Democratic presidential front-runner Hillary Clinton -- any favors if the president hits the campaign trail as often for Hillary as he says he will.

Indeed, Obama seems to enjoy belittling Republican rhetoric on national security and terrorism, which is not a good look for him on days like today, when the Islamic State reminded the world it can still strike prime civilian targets with impunity. The March 22 attacks proved ISIS hasn't been crippled by renewed vigilance, not when the fundamentalist group can hit an airport and a subway station in one of Europe's major capitals.

If Obama keeps on joking, he runs the risk of hurting the eventual Democratic nominee more than helping. It's not far-fetched to imagine campaign ads tying Clinton to Obama, with a voiceover of the latter making jokes about terrorism over footage of blood-soaked women and children stumbling out of ruined airport terminals.

The decision-makers and strategists who run the Democratic party should remind Obama that he's the president, not a comedian. The time for joking is over.

Click Here for an Opposing View on this Subject 

Last Tango in Argentina

Barack Cuts the Rug with Unidentified Argentine Leg Humper During State Dinner in Buenos Aires

Bound and determined to wear out Air Force One before leaving office, the most traveled First Family in American History make the most of their 2nd term lame duck fun and frolic "Hey,We Haven't Been There Yet" World Touring while they're still on the taxpayer's dime. 

Bobby Jindal Throws Hat Into The Ring for VP

The one time darling of the GOP, former Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal, who failed miserably in his bid for president has announced that he’s standing in support of Donald Trump.  Jindal, who was at one time extremely critical of Trump as "Bombastic" and "Off Kilter' as a presidential candidate, has now had an epiphany, so to speak, and has hitched his tarnish wagon of political hopes to the stallion D.J.Trump who seems to be running away with the race.

Our popular Governor was re-elected to a second term in a landslide, but immediately began running for president soon thereafter, increasing state spending and bloating a state budget with things like creative hiring practices of state consultants and increasing state employee roles to make Louisiana employment numbers look better then the national average. Jindal left the state with a swollen 29 Billion dollar budget, and $1.8 billion in the Red. (just as comparison to a  state with similar population numbers, Oklahoma's state budget is 6 Billion).  After turning his attention solely to bolstering his resume as a stanch conservative to impress the primary voter base, and not with the business of the betterment of his state in mind, he left office two months ago as the least popular governor in the country.

But Bobby Jindal is no fool. A Rhodes Scholar and son of Indian immigrants, he sees himself a well versed and softer spoken compliment to Donald Trumps brashness, to be used as a deflection of the media and the left's mantra of Trump being anti-immigrant and racist. Jindal says now he believes Trump’s success is a “death knell” for the Republican establishment, the one he himself rode to victory twice. 

"The reality is, you can do the math. He has done very, very well. It is exactly what is wrong with the GOP establishment and it ignoring the will of the voters."

Believe me when I say, Bobby Jindal has just actively thrown into the ring his hat for VP.  

How Ironic: The Day Obama Claims to Bury The Last Remnant of The Cold War, ISIS Attacks the Capital of Europe

During his speech in Havana, President Obama proclaimed, "I have come here to bury the last remnant of the Cold War  The juxtaposition of Obama speaking with the chaos in Brussels demonstrated just how disconnected he is with the real world. The disconnection was further reinforced with his presence at a MLB exhibition game between the Cuban National Team and the Tampa Bay Rays complete with bromancing Derek Jeter and doing the wave with Raul Castro. I suppose we should be thankful that Havana isn't abundant with golf courses.

This trip to Cuba & his legitimization of the Castros speaks a great deal about Obama's priorities. This is bad enough as an exercise in vanity, but's even worse when ISIS is actively murdering civilians on American soil and on the soil of our allies & all Obama can say is that ISIS isn't Islamic. For better or for worse, it's the sort of thing that makes people turn to Donald Trump. - Aaron Goldstein, The Spectacle