A Good Monday Morning

Hillary Rodham: Violent Avenger of Bunnies

Even before the silly news broke of an 11 year old video of Donald Trump's egregious Pussygate,  locker room language not usually used in polite company, or before talk of who does or doesn't possess the temperament to be President, we were treated to an even more true shocker of a story (conveniently ignored by the media) by author Edward Klein in his new book 'Guilty as Sin'.

Mr. Klein has previously written in 'The Truth About Hillary', that Hillary was a big old thigh licker with "no wifely instincts."

In his new book he reveals that she cusses and has an explosive temper, (she is said to have blooded-up a sitting president over a stain on a carpet or something) and probably can’t be trusted to be president because she could very well be not only a serial liar, but pathologically violent:

"Hillary’s combative behavior is nothing new; she’s been that way all her life. For my 2005 book The Truth About Hillary, I interviewed Hillary’s grammar school classmate, Jim Yrigoyen, who told me the story of being ordered by Hillary to guard a warren of baby rabbits, and not give any of them away to neighborhood boys. When he did, recalled Yrigoyen, “Hillary hauled off and punched me in the nose."

"She’s been using people as punching bags ever since...."

Well, the little jerk did give away the baby bunnies after being told not to now didn’t he?  A baby bunny belongs in the nest with the mama, not in the incompetent hands of some little snot-nosed creep who’s likely to let it die. 

But this story goes a long way in explain Hillary's reported legendary violence while reigning as the nation's First Lady.  And I might remind you of that time back in 2012 when stories emerged of Young Mitt Romney having bullied a kid at prep school by knocking him down and chopping his hair off with scissors, so he’d stop being a long-haired hippie type. We didn't elect him either, now did we?

But will all this matter to Democrats? Barack Obama once admitted to playground violence by pushing a girl on the playground! And even worse, there was monstrous child Joe Biden, who threatened to punch bullies in the nose for messing with his friend!  And just look what these people have done to our country!

The question is America: do we disqualify ourselves from voting for a candidate who has on occasion used a colorful word for a female body part, as boys sometime do?  Or do we take a chance and elect another Democrat with a blatant history of violence against their fellow man?  I Think Not!

Thank You MJA for the Linkage!

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

* No Tuxedos Required *

Coach Oeaux vs The Swamp Chickens

Florida Roosters (Swampus-gallinaceous defensi)

What I'm about to say may seem to some insensitive, but is what the sports media can not say for Political Correct reasons. And yes, I have experienced hurricanes; Katrina, Rita and Ike.  Gainesville was not projected to be in the path of hurricane Matthew, being on the weak eastern side, no where near the coast and far from the eye. Just squalls and winds, the sun will more then likely be shining bright in Gainesville Sunday afternoon. 
The #18 ranked Florida Gators chose to cancel the Saturday meeting with the LSU Tigers at The Swamp in  Gainesville. They were well within their right as home team.  But they also refused to consider rescheduling the game.

The Tigers offered to fly in and play Sunday night in The Swamp, field condition permitting.  Fla.. refused.  LSU offered to play a Monday night.  Fla. refused.  LSU offered to play in any open stadium in the south of Florida's choice.  Fla. refused. They stalled and hid behind the SEC Commissioner until he postponed the game indefinitely. 

In defense of the Florida Gators, with their toothless offense and their much vaunted mythical Defense, you know, the one the Vols hung 28 points on in less then 15 min, and the same one that SEC powerhouse Vanderbilt beat up last week, coupled with what LSU did to Missouri last Saturday, I wouldn't want to face the Tigers either.  Florida Coach McIlwain saw the storm was gonna be a gift from heaven.

Oh well, McIlwain can take his swamp roosters down the road a bit to Disney World Saturday instead. They reopen at 8am. 

There's a reason fried Gator meat taste like chicken.....

This Week in the SEC:

#1 Alabama vs #16 Arkansas:
If Alabama were to lose a game this year, this would be the one to lose. I think it would have less affect on the The Tide's run then a loss to A&M. The Hogs have made the Tide sweat through the last two meeting, but as usual, the tide will pull away in the 4th quarter.
I say The Tide by 10  ✔

#9 Tennessee vs #8 Texas A&M
The Vol's Cinderella season takes a hit this weekend as the Agricultural and Mechanical Dudes from Texas defense are a bit to much. This may be a very close and low scoring game. (Sorry Dutch, I call um like I see um)
I say A&M by 6  ✔

Nothing else to call this week. The big 10 is still beating up cupcakes and the rest I really have no interest in.

After just missing on both of my upsets calls last week Diogenes went 2-2, and 9-3 on the year so far. 

Bad Lip Reading: First Presidential Debate 2016

☠☠☠☠☠

The Historical First The Media Refuses To Acknowledge

Op-ed
by Middle Finger News Service Janitor TIM:

Through all the noise of the media about scandals, who is and who isn't fit to be president and the first woman nominated....blah blah blah, there's one story that sadly for many in this great nation like me, goes unreported.

The highway of history is littered with TIMs kicked into the ditch. Throughout our lifetimes, we TIMs have repeatedly had to endure humiliation thanks to the misguided actions of a few bad apples sharing our name. Who are the first TIMs that come to mind? How about Dr. Timothy Leary, the hippie college professor and psychologist whose name is synonymous with LSD and the launch of the drug culture in America in the late sixties? Or perhaps you thought of Timothy McVeigh, notorious domestic terrorist. Even in the movies, when asked who was the WORST James Bond ever, everybody knows the correct answer: Timothy Dalton, of course.

There have been plenty of people with names like John, Robert, William, and James selected to run as Vice President – and a whole bunch of Dicks. There have even been VP candidates with obscure names like Chester, Rufus, and Hannibal. (Honest.) But until this year, there has never been a single person named TIM selected to be a presidential or vice presidential candidate.

The media won’t talk about this dirty little secret, but we TIM’s have been pushed around or ignored politically for the past 220 years. For too long, TIM’s have had to live with the cruel acceptance that our name was primarily associated with cripples and freaks — from the pitiful Tiny Tim in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol to the grotesque long-haired oddball ukulele-playing singer who, using that same name, became embarrassingly famous for his falsetto rendition of Tiptoe Through the Tulips. 

Speaking of music, there are scores of memorable songs with people’s names for the title: Michele, by the Beatles, Abraham, Martin, and John, by Dion, or Barbara Ann by the Beach Boys. The list is endless. But have you ever heard of a song with TIM in the title? No, you haven’t. No, wait a minute. I stand corrected. There actually was ONE song with TIM in the title. Written in 1970, the song Timothy told the story of three men trapped in a collapsed mine, two of whom resorted to cannibalism against the third guy ..... that’s right, they ate Tim.

And I remember sitting on my dad’s lap as a young child, asking him, “Dad, do you think someday someone named TIM could ever grow up to be President of the United States?”.....to which he would usually say, “I’m sorry. Who are you?” When I would remind him I was his youngest son, he would pause and say, “A president named TIM? Seriously?” Then he’d laugh and laugh at such an inconceivable notion.

Oh sure, 2016 may be remembered by some as the year our nation finally elects a woman president. Tim Kaine may be a blathering idiot, but if you ask me, objectively speaking, the far bigger story is that this will be remembered as The Year of TIM – The year America finally puts someone named Tim in the White House.

*TIM is MFNS senior journeyman janitor and a keen observer of culture. He is a longtime resident of the YMCA and one of the nation's foremost collectors and experts on antique sports whistles. 

Another Creepy Clown Sighting

Hillary's Husband, Kinky Foot Massages and Penthouse Babes........

According to Journalist Edward Klein, Somethings Never Change.

via Fellowship of the Minds

Bill Clinton is 70, frail, reportedly has Parkinson’s disease, but still a horn dog. Journalist Edward Klein, author of the new book Guilty As Sin: Uncovering New Evidence of Corruption and How Hillary Clinton and the Democrats Derailed the FBI Investigation, writes for the New York Post, Oct. 2, 2016, that Bill Clinton has young female interns massage his feet in the secret “executive suite” of the William J. Clinton Presidential Library and Museum in Little Rock, Arkansas.

According to the New York Post, the top floor of the 153,779-square-foot presidential library is dominated by a 5,000-square-foot penthouse that is strictly off limits to the public.  The “executive suite,” as it is called in city records, was completed at the same time as the $165 million library in November 2004.

In interviews for Klein’s book, a “20-something intern” recalled:

"He often invites girls like me who work at the library to his apartment for a glass of red wine and a massage. He likes his neck and shoulders massaged because he gets knots in his muscles. But what he really likes is to have his feet massaged. He just kicks off his loafers and socks and puts his feet on the coffee table. That really makes him happy.

Bill is always flirting with the women at the library. He knows everybody by their first name and is incredibly kind and generous.

“Bill has a bunch of women he regularly invites to his apartment. Most of them are young and good looking. He loves being surrounded by pretty girls. The place is completely secure, so he knows there’s no chance any photographers can get in. I was there at one of his parties on a hot, steamy day. He served champagne and cold beer and handed out roses, which he grows on the terrace and which are named after his mother, Virginia Kelley. At one point, he got out a hose and sprayed some of the girls."

There is much, much more Here