The Brides of Chucky

Taking a Stand in the Debate Over Illegal Immigration

According to the Sacramento Bee, the City Council of the celebrity enclave  of Malibu California voted 3-2 earlier this month to approve a resolution prohibiting use of city resources to enforce federal civil immigration law, thus joined the ranks of sanctuary cities.

Councilwoman Councilperson Laura Rosenthal introduced the resolution after Malibu resident, actor and former President Martin Sheen, appeared before the council in December to urge a sanctuary designation. Rosenthal told the Los Angeles Times: 

"When I reached out to some of the people at the schools and other people in the community, they told me people are scared. To the influx of immigrants coming into Malibu who may be undocumented, I wanted to send a clear message that we are here for you."

Malibu is home to wealth movie moguls and rock stars from Bob Dylan to Steven Spielberg and Barbara Streisand, who interestingly just so happened recently got their panties in a wad over access to the beach in front of their homes by the unwashed commoners. 

So you can't imagine my surprise when Diogenes recently received an email from Barbara Streisand (obviously by mistake) and addressed to someone named Arthur Sulzberger, who must run a website or something that famous people write Op-eds and pretend to know a lot about everything. After I read the unpublished post embedded in the email, I couldn't resist sharing it with my readers.

-----Original Message-----
From: babs_in_toyland@yahoo.net
Sent: Sunday, March 5, 2017  2:50 AM
To: Arthur Sulzberger < Diogenes Middle Finger@gmail.com >
Subject: Immigration Op-ed
 

Dear Arty,

Here is the article you asked I write about at the Glorious One's last invite to dinner at the White House. I'm sorry it isn't quite up to Babs' usual intellectual excellence, but I am so distracted these days by all the pretty things Babs surrounds herself with. I know a guy who lives as you do would understand about this kind of thing also. I'm sending my pool boy to NY with the $247.00 submission fee (such a pittance for a posting fee these days) but I don't mind doing my part to redistribute the wealth as our former great leader Barack once said we should.

Power to the Correct People,

B.S.

Why I'm Against Immigration Reform

By Barbara Streisand

I have this employee in my housekeeping department we'll call "J". We'll call her that because most Hispanic people have a name starting with the letter J and I strictly forbid my employees from learning the names of each other because name-knowledge promotes needless chit-chat. It would be hypocritical of me not to abide by the same instructions I demand my staff follow, therefore I have no clue as to J's real name.

While reviewing security footage one night with my husband.....what's his name.... I noticed that everyone really seemed to like J. They smiled at her, waved at her, and often made physical contact,  which I'm told expresses admiration, support, or just general kindness. The traditions of the everyday little people are simply fascinating!

Coincidentally, J passed me in the hallway the other day. While she was careful to observe the two-foot rule, she did not abide by Chapter 25, Paragraph 15 of the, "Streisand Household Handbook for Successful Dealings with Ms. Streisand," which states, "On rare occasions in which you are lucky enough to come within earshot of Ms. Streisand, you are to refrain from making a single sound with any part of your body, orifice or otherwise, or article of clothing. Violation of this rule could result in termination, and replacement." She dare muttered "Excuse me!"

People seem to enjoy enjoy the company of J even though she has no musical ability. How in the world does she pull that off? Babs no comprendo.

I asked husband about it and he said that a lot of people enjoy engaging in conversation for recreational purposes. Apparently speaking with others is cathartic for some. But she doesn't speak with people because she’s asking for political favors or election donations. She's not admonishing underlings for inappropriate eye-contact, because 13% of the kitchen floor tiles contain unacceptable levels of grime, or because she found a Cheerio underneath the refrigerator and is demanding to know who's responsible. So apparently J is the Barbra Streisand of talking to people. Like I am great at singing, she is great at conversing. I'm told those who excel at conversation often have many friends.

The reason I became an Academy Award winning superstar singer/actor/director triple threat is so I could talk to other Academy Award winning living legends. If I wanted to talk to maids, I would have taken up house cleaning.  Conversations with the help are a waste of my time and a waste of their time. And I'm paying them while they're at my residence.  Plus, it's always awkward because I can't understand a word they say.  Besides, people don't get paid to talk to Barbra Streisand; people pay to talk to Barbra Streisand.  

So why do I care so much about a meaningless staffer that I may have already fired but don't remember? Why do I care so much about a lady that I may eventually have deported because her extra-dark arm hair really grosses me out? Why do I care so much about a woman who may one day accuse me of devouring an entire box of Twinkies because I desperately want to keep a late night binge session secret?

Well, the truth is, I don't. But Babs needs a supply of readily available inexpensive fence jumpers for replacements and full staffing. That's why I'm against Immigration reform!

Thank You MJA for the Linkage

Middle Finger Symphony Theater

* No Tuxedos Required *

Brought To You By BLUESJUNKY - Honorary Chair of Music - Middle Finger Symphony Music Director

Fishnet Friday

Schumer Continues to Further the Bad Reputation of Rats

The leader of the "Pack of Rats", Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer of New York, said today that the democrats will filibuster the nomination and not vote to confirm Judge Neil Gorsuch to the U.S. Supreme Court.  Yeah, I know you're as shocked as I am seeing it's coming from the mouth of the Meryl Streep of CSPAN.

The New Punks - Chuck & Nancy

And Schumer, being the punk we all know him to be predictably trotted out his bogus reasons for opposing Gorsuch, all of them easily lifted from Democrat political talking points and none of them having anything to do with the law: 

"He favors the powerful over the weak.” ........."He won’t act as a check on President Trump”.........“We don’t want judges with ice water in their veins......”  

“After careful deliberation I have concluded that I cannot support Judge Neil Gorsuch’s nomination to the Supreme Court........”

Chucky engaged in no “deliberation” at all and made up his mind to oppose Judge Gorsuch before the man was even nominated, demonstrating an absolute lust for the irrelevant, and even suggesting that the New York State Bar Exam, which Schumer passed after graduating from Harvard Law (where else?), is way too easy.

But then Schumer, the greasy lawyer he is, knows that his objections to Gorsuch are political and have nothing to do with law or the proper role of judges. 

The “Fearless Girl” Statue of Wall Street Revealed Her True Self

So there is this monument to the suicidal hubris of modern women and their
inability to discern their actual abilities vs their inflated egos.......... 

Epic troll: “Fearless girl” Statue Decorated in Trump Gear

The statue of a young girl installed earlier this month as a publicity stunt was erected by multi-trillion dollar asset manager State Street Global Advisors and NY advertising firm McCann to pay tribute to Women’s History Month as well as International Women’s Day. The feminist were orgasmic.

But thanks to Trump supporters she also got to showed her patriotism....

RAP-In addition sporting a “MAGA” hat, the Trump supporters tied an American flag around her neck as a cape, and posted a sign at her feet that read “VETS B4 ILLEGALS.” They also included a sign with a drawing of Pepe the Frog wearing “deal with it” shades. 

According to social media, the “Fearless Girl” has returned to her original form, but that’s probably due to the fact that triggered lefties beat her up and stole all her Trump gear.

Here is a photo from the “Fearless Girl’s” Uncuckening:  

(Gothamist Photo)                     Thank You MJA for the Linkage!

DPRK Disputes "Fake News" Reports of Failure of Dung Noodle ICBM Test.

MFNS Nork Bureau - Pyongyang: The official North Korean News Agency today issued a statement from the DPRK Ministry of Truth on the false and widely reported failure of the Nork's latest missile test by the American Fake News Media. The test was reportedly conducted early Wednesday over the Sea of Japan. 

In part the statement read:

"The valiant scientist of the the Missile Defense Forces of the Glorious Empire of the Peoples Republic of Korea today conducted a successfully test of the latest and most advanced version of the stealth 'Dung Noodle P33' Intercontinental Ballistic Missile. 

The test missile was launch from a super-secret base near the city of (deleted) in the eastern territory. After a successful launch and a few seconds of glorious flight the missile's highly advanced self-destruct circuits were initiated and successfully tested. 

After four successful crash tests of the secret Musudan Missile to test structural integrity,  the DPRK Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un and the highly smart scientist of the Glorious Empire of Korea again reiterate their unwavering commitment to build the Safest Weapons of Mass Destruction the world has ever know.  

This most recent test also sends a clear message to the Cheeto faced Capitalist Imperial Warmongering Leader of the West of the overwhelming superiority of the DPRK's scientific and military prowess......."  

Developing....... 

Joe Biden's "Buzzy Ginsburg Rule"

FP - Judge Neil Gorsuch’s confirmation hearings for Supreme Court Justice began this week, and amid the grilling — and attempts to smear him — came an ad that reminded everyone about the “Ginsburg Rule,” which is yet another thing the left would like people to forget now that it’s not convenient for them. 

Democrats are attacking Judge Neil Gorsuch because he won’t promise to support their political agenda,” the ad started off. The ad pointed to the 1993 confirmation hearings of now-Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, in which she declined to answer questions from Senators in over 70 instances. The Judicial Crisis Network released a video outing the left’s hypocrisy on this rule, which you can see below:

 

When the Democrats were aghast by Republican refusal to hold hearings for then-President Obama’s Supreme Court nominee, Merrick Garland, Judicial Crisis Network put out another ad featuring, you guessed it, Joe Biden. 

The video ad was titled: “To confirm or not to confirm: Democrats vs. Joe Biden.” It featured the senator making the GOP’s case.

Trigger Warnings - The Early Years.

Springer done this.

Funny How That Works: They're All For It Until They Have To Deal With It.......

Even before the dreamy Ricky Maddow doppelganger Justin Trudeau became Prime Minister of Canada, liberals have told us we should look to our more civilized and compassionate neighbors to the north as our moral betters in every way. But a new Reuters/Ipsos poll has threatened to shatter that illusion.

Despite Trudeau’s tweet welcoming all refugees to Canada, which he just happened to issue the same night that protests broke out over President Trump’s travel ban, it looks like the Canadian population at large appears to be “just as concerned about illegal immigration as their American neighbors,” with nearly half in favor of deporting refugees who are illegally crossing from the United States. 

 When asked about recent border crossings from the United States, 48 percent said Canada should “send these migrants back to the U.S.” But only 36 percent said Canada should “accept these migrants” and let them seek refugee status, with the remainder undecided. That will be up to Canada’s Immigration and Refugee Board to decide. 

But according to Reuters, even the executive director of the Canadian Council for Refugees admitted that “refugees are much more welcomed when we have gone and selected them ourselves as a country, as opposed to refugees who have chosen us”.  Sounds kind of xenophobic, EH? 

One Somali refugee whose successful trek to Canada began in Minneapolis told ABC News that “the U.S. used to be a ‘good country’ but now it’s ‘the worst country in the world.'” 

We’ll miss that guy.