What did you stop for, I got my head out of the wall!

 

440-lb Virgin Sends First Partner to ER

UPI - The first time that 440-pound Gregg Casarona had sex, he had his 110-pound girlfriend seeing stars after he put her head through the sheetrock wall of her parents' Long Island basement.

Casarona, who is 21, stopped after seeing what had happened, a move that his girlfriend, 22-year old Jen Gerakaris, didn’t appreciate at the time.

“Why’d you stop?” she asked after pulling her head out of the wall. “He looked like he was about to have a heart attack. So I just wanted to lighten the mood.”

His first reaction?

“I killed her,” Casarona recalled thinking. “This is my first time. And Jen is dead.”

Gerakaris soon became dizzy and nauseous so Casarona brought her to the hospital. She was diagnosed with a concussion.

Despite her injury, Gerakaris didn’t regret the decision.

"I knew he was a virgin and I honestly didn’t care," Gerakaris said. "We were dating for a little while and he hadn’t put any moves on me yet so I made a move. In the beginning, there were lots of pillows and we didn’t do it anywhere near a wall."

I'm respectfully fighting back the urge to comment on this....... 

Nothing Says Christmas in Alabama Like Prancing Drag Queens

A Good Monday Morning

Obama's Olympic 'In Your Face, Putin'

For the first time since 2000 and Jimmy Carter's silly boycott, the U.S. will not send a president, former president, first lady or vice-president (that's understandable) to the Olympic Games because of Russia's outlawing of  'Gay propaganda'.

But instead, the small U.S. delegation for the opening and closing ceremonies will include a FU message in the name of three openly gay athletes and a diplomat still hiding behind the closet door. Those athletes, tennis legend Billie Jean King and hockey player Caitlin Cahow, will be joined by the recently coming out figure skater Brian Boitano, and former cabinet secretary Janet Napolitano, a presidential advisor, and the U.S. ambassador to Russia.

Obama mouthpiece Jay Carney was asked at the daily White House press briefing whether the delegation was intended to make a obvious political point. While he said such a message would not be sent “through this manner,” his response also repeatedly referred to “diversity” — a word Carney mentioned seven times in his answers.

“Every member of that delegation is extremely accomplished, either in government service or in civic activism or, most especially, in sports. So he’s very proud of the delegation and the diversity it represents. And he looks forward, as every American does, to the competition and to the effort that American athletes will demonstrate when they compete in Sochi.”

The announcement prompted an enthusiastic response from the Human Rights Campaign, which recently sent a letter urging Obama to include gays and lesbians in the U.S. delegation, which they seemed to have gleefully agreed as if this was to be his revenge for being upstaged at the recent G20. The U.S. Olympic Committee has so far made no comment about the sexual orientation of the delegation.

Anyone up for making Duck Hunting an Olympic sport?

A Holiday Reminder From Al Sharpton....

Politically Correct Outrage Meter

(NY SUN)

Not Quite What They Expected.....From Us Or Them

Duck Dynasty is not the show that A&E wanted,
it is the show that got away from them.

In a sense Duck Dynasty is a modern day Beverly Hillbillies. Those Hillbillies had lots of money too, a love of family, and exotic tastes in food – eating possum and gizzards and all sorts of things that we regularly see the Ducks cooking – such as squirrel and frogs. The Hillbillies series started out mocking the family that called their luxury swimming pool a “cement pond” and outsmarted by simple technologies such as phones. America however wound up falling in love with the Beverly Hillbillies and especially with the tough and zany Granny. Soon enough the joke backfired as the series converted the mockers into fans and the jokes increasingly came at the expense of the city slickers.

Duck Dynasty has Beverly Hillbillies backfire written all over it:

"It seems what the producers intended and what A&E envisioned with the show is much different than the show that they ended up with, but they didn't do anything about it because it was so wildly popular and so wildly profitable. But even with all the money, they have never really been comfortable with what happened.

 The whole idea of the show was to parade these nouveau riche Christian hillbillies around so that we could laugh at them. "Look at them," we were supposed to say. "Look how backward they are! Look what they believe! Can you believe they really live this way and believe this stuff? See how they don't fit in? HAHAHA"  

 When the producers saw the way the show was shaping up, different than they envisioned it, they tried to change course. They tried to get the Robertson's to tone down their Christianity, but to their eternal credit they refused. They tried to add fake cussin' to the show by inserting bleeps where no cussword was uttered. At best, they wanted to make the Robertson's look like crass buffoons. At worst they wanted them to look like hypocrites.

 They desperately wanted us to laugh at the Robertsons. Instead, we loved them."

Watching Phil Robertson shoot, disembowel and skin  various animals then watch Mrs. Kay cook clearly discernible squirrels and ducks and otherwise engage in a cuisine that is foreign to us is part of the Ducks “charm”. You don’t have to enjoy the cooking to appreciate the lifestyle and love the Robertsons enjoy. You don’t have to agree with the religious opinions or even like all the cast members to enjoy the company of the Duck Dynasty crew and family.

As with the Beverly Hillbillies the Duck Dynasty is all about family. This family has had trial by fire. The patriarch Phil was a drunk and all around nogoodnik who abandoned his family and caused all sorts of trouble for himself and those that loved him. Eventually Phil, because of the love and persistence of his wife, corrected course. Today, it is clear that the family not only loves but respects Phil.

When a lizard escapes in the company warehouse, it is Phil that is called. When business pressures build up after a large order that cannot be fulfilled due to lack of workers it is Kay that comes though by organizing family and friends to the rescue. At every turn, in every situation, the parents are looked up to and respected. It is something shocking to see because that is a long gone narrative on American TV.

American TV today tells only one story when it comes to family: the kids are smart and the parents are idiots. That story is told in every entertainment show, movies (ever see Home Alone?), and commercials. The parents are dopes unable to function without the wise guiding hands of the children.

And that notion even reached into 2008 presidential politics, as Barack Obama’s campaign organized the young to lecture their elders on the wisdom of electing Barack Obama.