Tuesday, September 15, 2026
$Billions From Lizard Spit and the AI Monsters
Monday, September 14, 2026
Friday, September 11, 2026
Middle Finger Symphony Theatre
Wednesday, September 9, 2026
Your Attendance Has Been Approved for the Latest Long Awaited Official Almost Semi-World Famous Irredeemable Big Ass Open Thread
Tuesday, September 8, 2026
Some Tips on How to Survive the Revolution
"Trans men are getting their posts deleted for saying “guys. It’s insane."
"Has anyone here ever lived without money? Like, just decided to quit their job and purely lived off either the kindness of strangers or not so legal methods?"
"I did, for a little while. My partner would go out and dumpster dive, and I would forage and garden, that was our “grocery shopping.” I knew where to find fruit and wild vegetables. It took about a year to learn what was edible in the area. We started viewing people’s garbage as an inventory to draw whatever we needed from. Our dwelling place looked abysmal, but functioned.
Living free brings out a wild, animalistic side of the human brain that most people aren’t accustomed to. It got hard to get along with the rest of the world around us. I still worked a job as a fry cook....."
".....and my partner got into a fight with one of my coworkers."
"We also fought with our neighbours who were my friends. I truly miss the experience, but I believe it was too much for my ex to handle and it accelerated their mental health issues."
"I spent several years trying to live in rejection of capitalism; I squatted, I hustled, I did commercial burglaries and retail thefts, dumpster dove, lived on the kindness of others, but money usually reared its ugly head one way or another."
"My record (for a year) is around $600. Squatting, dumpster/Papa Murphy’s at closing time. I had a company phone from my old job so no bill. They found out eventually but I had free service for a few years. Pigs!"
"I wanna discuss and explore with you what, er, how we divest from capitalism while balancing, and, er, while getting adequate nutritional needs. We’re not gonna burn out this time. We’re not gonna let the resistance break us."
Tiktok commies are doing revolution meal prep, I am dying ππ
— Bugman Hegel (@FedPoasting) November 15, 2023
You cannot make this up. pic.twitter.com/2OYFD6A2NP
Monday, September 7, 2026
Local Police Just Dropped the Most Sarcastic Birthday Wish Ever.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MANDY
"It’s not every day we get the opportunity to help someone celebrate their birthday, but today is a special occasion.
Our detectives made sure to let us know that today is Mandy Lindsey’s birthday — and since Mandy is currently wanted by the Shreveport Police Department, we figured we should help make it memorable. TODAY the judge issued a birthday warrant!!!
Mandy is wanted on two counts of Felony Theft in connection with the theft of a boat, trailers, tools, and other property valued at more than $19,000.
For her birthday, SPD would like to offer Mandy a special package that includes free transportation and complimentary lodging at one of our local correctional facilities.
The accommodations are all-inclusive — meals, security, and a structured daily schedule are provided at no additional charge.
Detectives obtained a warrant for Lindsey after an investigation involving surveillance footage, license plate reader technology, and other evidence.
If you know where Mandy is celebrating her birthday, call Caddo-Shreveport Crime Stoppers at 318-673-7373.
Mandy, no need to make a reservation. The detective already handled the paperwork."
via Highway 98.9, KTUX-FM, Townsquare Media
Thursday, September 3, 2026
Somebody Say Football??
I feel like one of them may stroke out at any moment.
— MAGA Lorrie Ann πΊπ²πΊπ²πΊπΈ AMERICA FIRST (@LorrieAnn25) August 28, 2026
I hope there's a doctor close by! pic.twitter.com/2TRF0gPwbH
Tuesday, September 1, 2026
Now That Their Monster is Loose Democrats Pretend They're Not Dr. Frankenstein.
— Diogenes Sarcastica (@KonanBarBarron) September 2, 2026
Monday, August 31, 2026
Sunday, August 30, 2026
And Here I didn't Even Know I Had One! π
Thursday, August 27, 2026
Wednesday, August 26, 2026
Hell Yeah! We Gettin' Boiled Crawfish in Space!
"Starbase Louisiana will be built to support thousands of Starship flights a year. This self-sustaining spaceport will have propellant production, power generation, deep-water shipping capabilities, vehicle processing facilities, and an airport. We’re committed to investing at least $100 billion and creating more than 3,000 new jobs at Starbase, Louisiana hiring heavily from nearby communities and utilizing Louisiana workers’ extensive experience of building complex infrastructure in their unique environment.
We’re partnering with state and federal agencies to expand Louisiana’s Coastal Master Plan and Coastal Wetlands Planning, Protection and Restoration Act projects, including Gulf shoreline protection breakwaters designed to reduce wave energy and slow loss along the Gulf edge."
When people think of SpaceX, they think of a lot of engineers and scientists ... but actually the most common job at SpaceX is technician, or welder, or tube bender. These are actually the people who add the most value. And we are loaded with them!
— Tony Falcone (@tfalcone68) August 25, 2026
Tuesday, August 25, 2026
Courtney's Choice Quality Quotes of the Week for Your Increase Smarterness
| Courtney Is Judging You Now |
"For nearly 30 glorious minutes, America began to feel like America again. Truth reigned again. Facts mattered again. Context was once again a thing. Decency felt within our grasp. You could almost hear angels singing, a sound as lovely as the laughter of children. And then, just when it began to feel real, Warner Bros. Discovery fixed its technical glitch, and CNN came back on the air." - John Nolte
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" If there was one boogeyman of the Democrat Party’s primary season it was those damn “Joooos!” While even (most of) the Democratic Socialists of America candidates were smart enough not to come right out and say it, they all used the agreed upon code words to discuss their rabid anti-Semitism. That code word? “AIPAC” - The American-Israel Public Affairs Committee. Weirdly, however, as the most left-wing primaries are ending now, the demonization of AIPAC has quieted...." - Derek Hunter
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"From what I’ve learned over the years, the main reason prosecutors don’t bring charges against corrupt Democrats is because of the fear of retaliation by Democratic prosecutors — either from state prosecutors (think former Fulton County D.A. Fani Wills) or from DOJ prosecutors after Democrats take back the White House.
We’ve all seen how horrible the retaliation is. It’s not just prosecution. The prosecutors will also lose their law licenses. They’ll be doxxed and receive death threats. Their reputations will be destroyed and it will be difficult to find jobs, even outside of the law. Most of them don’t have any other skills; they’ve spent their entire careers in the law.
I always say I’m ironically lucky the left destroyed my law license, because if I’d gone to work for the DOJ under President Donald Trump, as soon as a Democrat gets back into the White House, I’d be one of their juiciest targets for disbarment and prosecution. I fear for all of Trump’s top DOJ attorneys." - Rachel Alexander
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"Memes them until they cry ......Then make memes about them crying." - Gen. George Patton
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"California has officially signed the "Stop Nick Shirley Act" (AB 2624) into law. This bill was created only after I exposed widespread fraud in immigrant communities across America, specifically in California's Medicaid, nonprofits and other welfare programs funded by our tax dollars.
These politicians need the fraud to continue and they sadly use immigrants to do so often. They fund nonprofits and NGOs with hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars every year for immigration services, including free healthcare and have now made "immigration support service providers" essentially a protected class in California." - Nick Shirley
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"Hillary never could understand that Bill’s charm was real because he genuinely likes people. Hillary, meanwhile, invariably displays dislike and disdain for people. Who can forget her Deplorables comment? She’s like an angry Doberman in a pink tutu. You can dress that dog up as much as you like, but you know it’s mean." - Andrea Widburg
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"While you struggle with the cost of gas, Trump offers you the spectacle of an IndyCar race hoping you will not notice. More taxpayer money spent on his self-aggrandizing distractions." - Shithead Adam Schiff
Moments Later...
"No, no, Adam. He wanted you to notice and bask in the pride of being AMERICAN, watch great racing and patriotism on display. Not only that, this was privately funded, not government although it drove thousands of folks to the DC area that have never been (that’s economic impact for you). It allowed folks who have never been to see museums, monuments, the White House and AMERICAN history for the first time as well. And guess what, hundreds of thousands of AMERICANS, blue & red, as well as fans from all over the world loved the #Freedom250!" - Graham Rahal
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Hakeem Jeffries elaborates on the entire “democrat” platform in succinct fashion. pic.twitter.com/kOPoDPeqCN
— FOπ YOU (@F0XYOU) August 25, 2026
Monday, August 24, 2026
The Day the Incomprehensible Got Her Name
On August 24, 2005, like everyone else in the world, Louisiana and her people were busy about the business of planning their future. Planning for the next weekend, planning for the next day.
But hundreds of miles east of Louisiana, at 10 am CDT on this date 21 years ago, Tropical Depression Twelve officially became Tropical Storm Katrina. Five days later, it would become something so incomprehensible that people still talk about it. So big, of course, that football wasn’t even important at the time.
We really know neither the day nor the hour when something incomprehensible will arrive. Ours was a hot day in August.
On Wednesday the 24th, new LSU head coach Les Miles appeared for the first edition of The Les Miles Show at Walk-On’s in Baton Rouge alongside longtime Tiger radio voice Jim Hawthorne. The two were discussing Miles and the team’s preparations for the season opener on Sept. 3rd. By Monday, everything they had discussed about the opener would prove useless.
Katrina struck Louisiana on August 29. LSU’s athletic buildings took on purposes nobody could’ve imagined for them five days earlier. The Carl Maddox Field House became a special-needs shelter. The Pete Maravich Assembly Center became a medical triage center. Black Hawk and Chinook helicopters landed inside Bernie Moore Track Stadium. Washers once used for the sweat and grime of football and basketball uniforms were used to clean sheets and towels for storm victims.
August 24, 2005 tells us to carry necessary planning with some humility. Tomorrow must be planned for, but it is neither promised nor our final end. Everyone inside the LSU football program and across Louisiana were doing exactly what they were supposed to be doing that Wednesday. That same day, hundreds of miles away, a monster was receiving its name.
On Wednesday, the LSU Tigers had North Texas circled on its calendar. By Monday, the helicopters were landing at Bernie Moore and the PMAC was a hospital.
Make the plan, then, and live accordingly. Laissez les bons temps rouler, right? But may we remember that the good times are never promised to last, and tomorrow has never promised a sunny day. As for me, the 29th of August set the stage for the unlikely course in life that I traverse to this day.
Saturday, August 22, 2026
Friday, August 21, 2026
Middle Finger Symphony Theater
No Tuxedos Required
Thursday, August 20, 2026
The Only Comedian Less Relevant Than Rosie O'Donnell is Big Butthurt.
NYP -“I’m going to be honest today,” Griffin said at the start of her “Talk Your Head Off” podcast. “I might cry. I am asking for your pity. I love a good pity cry. I’m going to be open and honest and hope you understand. And I’m trying to talk about something bigger than TV talk shows, but you know, I talk a lot about Hollywood and I give you the inside scoop, etc. But this one’s really personal.
“I’m just going to come out and say it. Are you ready?” she continued. “It’s embarrassing to say, but I have to tell you guys because we’re friends. My feelings are really hurt that I was not invited to go on Rosie’s week of the Jimmy Kimmel show.”
Wednesday, August 19, 2026
Your Mid-Week Almost Semi-World Famous Irredeemable Big Ass Open Thread
Monday, August 17, 2026
Sunday, August 16, 2026
Sunday Soothingness
Friday, August 14, 2026
We Don't Hate These People Enough.
π¨ Fmr. ABC News’ Terry Moran Says Fauci Shut Down Their COVID Lab Leak Story
— Chief Nerd (@TheChiefNerd) August 14, 2026
“The day that it's supposed to air, it gets reviewed and it comes back to me — it is incomprehensible … I was told ‘Fauci’ … There was an organized campaign … to say there's no way there's a lab… pic.twitter.com/FM2Q6oe3m8
Thursday, August 13, 2026
Tuesday, August 11, 2026
Let's Check In on Our Old Friends Squinty & Meat Puppet Shall We??
To close the nearly 30-minute-long segment on Hasan Piker and the DSA, Joe Scarborough yelled at Dems over the Kamala Harris “They/Them” ad and said Democrats are “once again fumbling the football on the two-yard line” by “being so woke.” pic.twitter.com/iWbGibxuEt
— Nick (@nspin310) August 10, 2026
Monday, August 10, 2026
Saturday, August 8, 2026
Okay Class Let's Review....
- Name origin:It references the ancient Greek Cynic philosopher Diogenes of Sinope (c. 412–323 BC), who is traditionally credited with one of the earliest recorded uses of the middle-finger gesture as an insult (directed at the orator Demosthenes). The blog embraces a similar irreverent, “defacing the currency” (challenging conventional norms and hypocrisy) spirit.
- Author/persona: Written primarily under the pseudonym Diogenes Sarcastica (or “Jan” / “Blog Editrix” in posts). The voice is sarcastic, irreverent, and often crude. Early posts and anniversary notes indicate the blog launched around 2010.
- Style and content: Heavy use of satire, mock news reports under the “Middle Finger News Service” (MFNS), open threads, image galleries (“Image Vault”), and pointed political commentary.
- Frequent targets: Democrats, progressive politics, mainstream media, socialism/communism, identity politics, and various left-leaning politicians or activists. Mix of short punchy posts, longer rants, curated quotes, and light personal asides (pets, music recommendations, etc.).
- Self-described mission in early years: “kneecapping the political left with strong doses of satire, biting humor and serious commentary.”
- Deadpan mock-news format: (“Middle Finger News Service” / MFNS)
- Identity-politics parody: One of the most consistent targets is progressive identity claims.
Friday, August 7, 2026
I Must Apologize To Bernie Sanders
I must humble myself and apologize to Senator Bernie Sanders, the lone voice who cried for decades from the wilderness for "the warmth of collectivism", and to his socialist
Thursday, August 6, 2026
Courtney's Choice Quality Quotes of the Week for Your Increase Smarterness
| Courtney is Judging You Now |
There’s been a consistent history of poll errors that somehow always favor the Left. And the strategic effect of these polls is to depress voter turnout for the non-leftist side.
Some countries don’t allow pre-election polls and view them as election interference. I haven’t supported this position in the past, but I’m starting to come around to it as the media has become a comms machine aimed at securing victories for the left by any means necessary. - Daniel Greenfield
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"Democrats have borrowed a medieval anti-semitic conspiracy theory for their midterm campaign message.
"For centuries, this evil theory has been used to persecute Jews. The basic outline is always the same. It holds that the Jews, a small group of people from a distant land, who live differently than the rest of us, secretly control everything in our society through their money or their intelligence: We can only be free once they are stripped of their power, expelled -- or eliminated. ...
"Democrats -- most of them, anyway -- are smart enough not to name 'Jews' as the bad guys, so they pick on 'AIPAC' instead."- New York Post
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Fauci Claims the 5th:
“And that led Rand Paul to turn his hearing room into the most disgraceful Stalinist tribunal the United States Senate has ever seen.” - Lawrence O’Donnell on his 'Late Night for Retards' MS Now program.
And that gets back to the real reason some Democrats are now fighting the socialist-communist-anti-semitic types: the consequences of their silence and inaction are hitting home. These socialists, these DSA-ers, these communists are seeing some success and are unseating longtime, long-standing, long-serving entrenched party loyalists. That has the entrenched worried. They don’t care so much about the country as they do about the painful reality of reaping what they’ve sown.
Maher. Carville. Anxious Democrats speaking with one part concern and three parts anxiety about the DSA — anxiety because they know the DSA is coming for their seats. They all share the same singular common denominator of failing to speak up when it was important to speak up. They all could have seen the socialist-communist-anti-semitic storm that was coming when it was in its beginning breezes.
But they cared little because in their minds, the enemy was the Republican Party, or Donald Trump, or MAGA, or before that, the tea party, and they were willing to unite with these evil forces to destroy a common enemy. - The Washington Times
Wednesday, August 5, 2026
Irrelevant Hollywood Leftist Filmmaker and Cholesterol Enthusiast Surfaces to Support Rebel Insurgency.
Tuesday, August 4, 2026
We Will Assure Everyone Gets Their One Government Banana a Week....
These folks have no idea how to run a business, have never run a business, and — wait for it — they put out an RFP to let entrepreneurs run their state sponsored grocery stores
— @jason (@Jason) August 3, 2026
So… the government is going to pay companies to discount groceries, which have a 1-2% profit margin…
Monday, August 3, 2026
Sunday, August 2, 2026
Update: Anyone Seen Tingles Matthews?? π§
MFNS -Washington - MSNBC political commentator Chris Matthews today announced he would proudly donate his famous "Tingling Leg" to the future Barack Obama Presidential Failure Library said to be now in the planning stage of construction.
"Every since I made that statement on-air about the tingle up my leg the night of the election, the conservative bloggers have been shellacking me with it night and day!. So I plan to amputate it and donate it to the Obama Library when it opens and make all those bastards look like fools" Matthews told Middle Finger News.
Ask if he was absolutely serious about the statement he told us, "Look, we were indeed drinking heavily during commercial breaks in the election coverage, but on air I was sitting next to Rachel Maddow for Gods sake! And while she was wild eyed and had on a nice pair of fishnets and playing footsie under the table with Andrea Mitchell.... I know the tingle wasn't because of them! That was 100% adrenaline and admiration for Barack Obama because of the outcome of election night."
There has at this time been no official statement from the White House, but Press Secretary Jay Carney suggested the addition of the famous amputated leg, preserved in a glass case in the entrance to the future library would be an towering symbol of the love and support by members of the media for the 44th President in his heroic struggle to save America.
" Barack will get the leg for his library.....I'll show those bastards!" said Matthews.
Saturday, August 1, 2026
Friday, July 31, 2026
Gentlemen, You've Been Doing It Wrong. π€£
Wednesday, July 29, 2026
The Public Saw the Articles. Not Influence Operation Behind Them.
REVEALED: Here Are the Mainstream Journalists on China’s Payroll π¨
— Natalie Winters (@nataliegwinters) July 27, 2026
I exclusively uncovered the identities of prominent U.S. journalists flown to China by a CCP-linked influence operation seeking “favorable coverage” and “positive messages” about Beijing. π§΅
The names come from Natalie Winters’ investigation matching public DOJ FARA filings (on CUSEF and its PR firm) with archived CUSEF newsletters & reports that documented the trips.
The names include:
- Ezra Klein, New York Times columnist - Matthew Yglesias, Vox co-founder - Ronald Brownstein, CNN senior political analyst - Bradford Plumer, New York Times reporter - Marjorie Miller, former Associated Press vice president
- Steve Clemons, former The Hill editor-at-large - David Rohde, MS NOW senior national security reporter - Jonathan Alter, NBC News and MSNBC political analyst - David Sweeney, former NPR managing editor - Daniel Gross, former Yahoo Finance columnist
- Marilyn Geewax, former NPR senior editor - Kathleen Deveny, former Newsweek editor - Tom Omestad, former U.S. News & World Report correspondent - Steve Chapman, former Chicago Tribune columnist - Bruce Stokes, former National Journal correspondent
- Craig Gilbert, former Milwaukee Journal Sentinel Washington bureau chief - Tony Semerad, Salt Lake Tribune reporter - Shikha Dalmia, former The Week columnist - Jonathan Broder, former Newsweek senior writer
- Cristi Kempf, former Chicago Tribune associate managing editor - Jon Healey, Los Angeles Times deputy editorial page editor - Julian Pecquet, former Foreign Affairs reporter
Trip organizer CUSEF was founded by Tung Chee-hwa, a former senior official in the CCP’s United Front system, the influence apparatus Beijing uses to cultivate foreign elites and shape institutions outside China. The access went far beyond conference rooms.
Then came the coverage.......















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