Florida Caveman Wants to Be United States Senator

It’s Nice to Want Things

Floridian Troglodyte (homograycian)

Rep. Alan Grayson may be married to a bigamist. He’s compared the Tea Party to the KKK. He also wants to replace Marco Rubio in the Senate. Republicans couldn't be more thrilled.

Daily Beast

Alan Grayson is prone to making the type of outrageous comments on cable television that would make you squirm if they came from your drunk uncle at a family dinner. He is currently in the middle of a trial to determine if his wife is a bigamist and if they were ever even legally married. The trial is being delayed because her breast implants are leaking. And, besides all that, Grayson is a United States congressman considering a run for Senate.

 Grayson, who was just elected to his third term on Capitol Hill, has cast himself as a progressive champion. The Orlando-area Democrat has spent much of his second stint in Congress—he lost in the Tea Party wave of 2010 after his first election in 2008 and then won an open seat in 2012 after redistricting.

 he is best known for making bombastic, controversial remarks. He has compared the Tea Party to the KKK, alleged that Ted Cruz was ineligible to run for president, and claimed that the Republican alternative to Obamacare was encouraging the sick to die quickly. He also ran an ad in 2010 in which he compared his Republican opponent to the Taliban.  

Your Tantrums Are Wearing Kinda Thin......

“We have to make up our minds. Either we want to have segregation or integration and if we don’t want segregation, then we need to get rid of channels like BET and the BET Awards and the Image Awards, where you’re only awarded if you’re black. If it were the other way around, we would be up in arms. It’s a double standard.” - Stacey Dash

She's right. The fact of the matter is that black actors claiming to fight for “fairness” don’t really want it. What they want is to win, and in their alleged pursuit of what THEY call equality, all they’re really doing is being complicit in this little thing known as racism. They just want to win; plain and simple. Since they haven’t recently, they are looking for someone to blame, rather than looking at their work and evaluating what may have kept them from an Academy Award nomination. 

Maybe someone should have nominated the real Best Black Actors performances of the year:

Obama's Lawlessness Fuels Civil Disobedience and Record Government Distrust

CFIF - If Barack Obama refuses to follow the rule of law, how can he expect others to do so? 

That's a disturbing but perfectly legitimate question to raise as each day witnesses another scheme by the Obama Administration to circumvent established laws and constitutional mandates, and as an increasing sense of lawless chaos prevails both domestically and abroad.

Just how bad has the situation become? Two new Gallup surveys cast a worrisome scene.

When asked to name the nation's greatest threat as we enter the 2016 presidential election year, Americans by a record margin overwhelmingly say "big government." Particularly notable is the fact that the percentage of respondents holding that position has skyrocketed from 53% when Barack Obama entered office to 69% today. Thus, the man who so desperately endeavored to reverse Ronald Reagan's legacy by convincing Americans to welcome governmental power over our lives has ironically accomplished the direct opposite effect through his actions.

"A staggering 75% of the American public believe corruption is 'widespread' in the U.S. government. Not incompetence, but corruption. This alarming figure has held steady since 2010, up from 66% in 2009... Protests are growing in cities and campuses all around the country. Students and citizens have generally lost faith in their national institutions - the biggest and most powerful of which is, of course, the federal government."

When Obama entered office, he possessed an overwhelming majority in the House of Representatives, and a filibuster-proof Senate majority. Accordingly, he could have introduced any among his litany of extremist proposals on whatever issues he wanted - climate change, labor unions, gun control, immigration, closing of Guantanamo, treaties with Iran or anything else. 

But he didn't.

Only when his own actions created a backlash and caused Americans to elect Republican House and Senate majorities not seen since the 1920s did Obama miraculously find it appropriate to begin imposing his agenda by extra-constitutional means. 

Obama has infamously behaved just as lawlessly in other areas, such as unilaterally declaring the Senate to be in "recess" when only it has the power to do so, the swap of hardened terrorists for deserter Bowe Bergdahl in violation of his explicit duty to inform Congress beforehand, arbitrarily suspending and imposing ObamaCare regulations for political purposes, job-killing and punitive environmental regulations, IRS persecution of conservative organizations and now a commitment to impose gun regulations that he could have introduced into Congress back when he possessed overwhelming Democratic majorities.

Throughout his presidency, Obama has simply chosen to disregard constitutional and political constraints in order to impose his agenda. It can therefore come as no surprise that increasing instances of reciprocal lawlessness and disrespect for his own authority pop up everywhere from domestically to the Middle East to Ukraine to the South China Sea. He cannot expect others to demonstrate a respect that he himself does not show.

This nation was founded by men far wiser than Obama in the philosophy of individual freedom, not government fiat. Candidates hoping to enter the White House in one year would do well to understand that reality, and Americans increasingly disgusted and alarmed by government overreach would do well to translate their sentiments into electoral action.

The Democratic Party Problem:

We have a special problem in the United States, which is that the Democratic party is more of a crime syndicate than a political party, and it is deeply embedded in institutions ranging from the universities (where manufactured hate crimes and phony rape cases are used as political weapons) to the prosecutors' offices (which bully law-enforcement personnel and file specious felony charges against politicians for such ordinary actions as vetoing legislation) to the unions (see California) and the schools. It doesn't matter how many laws Hillary Rodham Clinton breaks, or how often she lies about it -- the attorney general is a Democrat, and that's that. Tom DeLay can be brought up on felony charges for allegedly having broken a law that wasn't even on the books at the time he was said to have broken it (the case was eventually laughed out of court, after it had ended his political career, which was the point) but IRS criminal conspirator Lois Lerner is going to spend the rest of her days enjoying a fat pension at your expense."— Kevin D. Williamson, National Review 

Joe Biden: The High School Years

Li’l Donald

Mrs. Abernathy called the roomful of eleven-year-olds to order and told them to open their math books to page thirty-one. Her eyes scanned the class and came to rest on a stocky boy beneath a dome of golden hair, who was making grotesque faces at a girl.

“Donald! What is the square root of a hundred and forty-four?”

The boy turned his attention to the teacher with sleepy-eyed indifference. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“What is the square root of a hundred and forty-four?”

“Do I know the square root of a hundred and forty-four? Is that what you’re asking me? Of course I do. It’s absurd that you would even ask me that.”

“Please tell the class what it is.”

“You want ME to tell the class? Excuse me—aren’t you supposed to be the teacher? I think we can all agree that, if anyone around here is going to tell the class the square root of a hundred and forty-four, you should be the one to do it. If you even know the square root of a hundred and forty-four—which, frankly, I have my doubts.”

This last phrase was delivered to three boys sitting across the aisle from the blond boy. They giggled.

“Do you know the answer, Donald?”

“Do I know the answer? Lady, I am super-smart. My I.Q. is, like, many multiples of the square root of a hundred and forty-four. Beyond anything you have seen in this grammar school, believe me.”

“Then you can tell us the square root of a hundred and forty-four.”

“Listen, I know the square root of a hundred and forty-four. I have known it for YEARS.”

“What is it?”

A Good Monday Morning

DMF Endorsement For President of the United States

Editorial
The Board of Middle Finger News Service

As we look upon the coming primary season soon to begin, the prospects are not pleasant in our eyes. On one side, we see a corrupt lying Grandmother, with a lecherous spouse, who is running for the nations highest office while the specter of indictment for high crimes and misdemeanors hang over her head.  Pitted against her a mumbling wild haired communist hippie left behind by the 1960's. Neither are our cup of tea in any fashion. And as the Republican side is for all intent and purpose down to two major candidates, one of which will soon be ruled ineligible because of birth, and the GOPe establishment's ongoing conspiracy to rig the game and deny the nomination to the second in favor of their own RINO stooge, we are forced to look for a viable candidate to support elsewhere.  

In the past few days, talk has been swirling in some political circles of a dark-horse candidate who has floated a trial balloon to see if there's a possibility of wide spread support. After much yelling and debate, we at DMF/ MFNS have, with further investigation and discussion decided to back this dark-horse: MFNS's Own Earl of Taint.

Earl is a simple man of integrity, not a political insider. He believes the government should get the Hell out of the way and leave us alone. His strong suit is his understanding of simple economics: You can't spend more than you take in and we need to stop the idiotic wasteful spending.   We see Earl as twisted enough to scare our enemies, and we know he will not have any empty sexual harassment allegations leveled at him as some candidates have in the past because as far as we know, no women have gone near him in years.

We at DMF / Middle Finger News Service firmly believe in an Earl of Taint candidacy, and wholeheartedly endorse his campaign for the Presidency.

It has come to us that he has visited with some potential advisers with impressive credentials, including the likes of the eccentric but knowledgeable Professor Marvin Butouski of the South Eastern Central State Junior College Ethnic Physics Department, and Snags Fitch, Grand Poobah of the Texas Masonic Elks Optimist Club.  His potential Cabinet appointees we find also impressive. Mentioned as a possible pick for Commerce Secretary is English born Harold Ashcott Hayes lll, the billionaire Texas Tampon Magnate, and for Transportation Secretary, Link Pilsner, former outlaw biker and expert on the nation's back roads and highway systems.

On Foreign Policy, we here at Middle Finger News Service unfortunately do not agree with Earl's long standing insistence on overthrowing the government of Paraguay in retaliation for his 1991 conviction (later overturned) for importing Toupees made from hair of endangered species. We do feel his world views would be tempered by his close friend and possible choice for Secretary of State, Klash Bazbo, who should be over the ugly head wound suffered in a recent bar confrontation political debate, and out of physical therapy in time to be confirmed.

The only possible problem we see with presently put forward Cabinet choices in Congressional Conformation Hearings could be the pick for Attorney General, Vincent “The Knee" Carbuzio. Mr. Carbuzio is a Houston businessman and expert on Law and the Federal Correction System, having been through it many times.

The Editorial Board of Middle Finger News endorses Mr. Taint because we too believe it's time to cut the crap and get the government off our backs. We also believe this is the first and most important endorsement of The Earl of Taint for President Campaign, with many to follow in our steps.

( NOTE: If you have any suggestions for a Taint Campaign Slogan, please leave them in the comments.)

The Tweeter-in-Chief: @POTUS Hosts a Twitter Q&A

Whitehouse.gov

President Obama took to Twitter to engage Americans on the real progress we've made to move our country forward and discuss how we can continue taking action to address the challenges and opportunities in the years ahead. After a town hall at McKinley High School in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, the President answered #AskPOTUS questions on a range of topics facing Americans right now.

The most asked question: 
Mr. President, where the hell is Baton Rouge and WTF are you doing there?

Brotherman Visits Baton Rouge

Obama swooped into the state capital in all his majesty yesterday to meet and have his ring kissed by our newly elected Governor. Later he ventured out for a taste of local cuisine, and afterward was quickly reminded he wasn't in Chicago....

ISIS Premiers New Talk Show For Women

MIDDLE FINGER NEWS SERVICE:

Raqqa Syria - ISIS today premiered their much anticipated Islamic version of the American television show "The View" on the Islamic state's official Syrian television channel. Geared towards the female adherence of  the 'Religion of Peace',  the hosts Wajhi, Daryri and Joy, cover such important topics as the latest in Burka fashions, Halal Food recipes, choosing the proper fitting suicide belt,  goat grooming, European travel tips as well as advice on proper etiquette for attending public executions.

My Hopes of Becoming a World Leader Have Been Throughly Dashed!

With so many people on the republican side of the isle jumping on the runaway birther train, riding it all the way to CruzCan’tBePresidentVille, and gettin' all up in his stuff, Senator Ted Cruz fights an uphill battle. Donald Trump kicked it off of course, because Trump is that guy who will always go there. And Senator Grouch McCain gleefully joined in for the fun of kicking a man while he’s down Canadian. Carly Fiorina hasn't quite said he was a dirty foreigner yet, but did point out that Cruz only just recently started loving America instead of making love to Canada. I guess we shouldn’t be so surprised that even his Senate colleagues have declined to defend him on this front.

And then the Washington Post had to go and make everything worser by finding a constitutional law professor lady, one Mary Brigid McManamon of Widener University’s Delaware Law School, to write an entire op-ed  about how Senator Ted cannot be president on account of the fact that his mother pushed him out of her female lady parts while in the frozen socialist tundra of Canada rather than the USA. Now, because a lawyer who is also a professor lady wrote it, and because that lawyer who is also a professor lady is fighting with some other lawyers (probably chauvinist males types) who already wrote about how all-American Senator Ted is, the op-ed has one million lawyer words. We’ve helpfully skimmed over it and given myself a bad headache in order to find and bring you the money shot:

"The Constitution provides that “No person except a natural born citizen . . . shall be eligible to the office of President.” […] On this subject, the common law is clear and unambiguous. The 18th-century English jurist William Blackstone, the preeminent authority on it, declared natural-born citizens are “such as are born within the dominions of the crown of England,” while aliens are “such as are born out of it.” The key to this division is the assumption of allegiance to one’s country of birth."

She also apparently feels so strongly about Senator Ted not being eligible to be president that she went and wrote an entire law review article  about the Natural Born Citizen Clause last year, merrily name-checking Cruz throughout. She gets all deep down and dirty originalist and textualist about it, just the way we conservatives like, and she concludes:

"The introduction to this Article posed a question: “in the eyes of early Americans, would someone born in a foreign country of American parents be a ‘natural born citizen’ and therefore eligible to be President of the United States?” The pertinent historical materials lead to only one conclusion: aside from children born to U.S. ambassadors or soldiers in hostile armies, the answer is “no.”

So I guess she showed Senator Ted, and he should just pack it in and give it up. The Wapo's  Constitutional Lawyer Lady friend from Delaware has spoken. And I, sharing the same unfortunate and unconstitutional black mark on my being, having been launched from my American Mother's female lady parts while in a foreign country, my devious future plans of becoming the first Lady Dictator Leader of the American people are officially dashed. I'm utterly crushed and devastated.    

Damn Idaho!

 * Seems wild gorillas have already killed the entire population of Maine 

Bulletin: U.S.State Department 01/13/2016

"US. Secretary of State John Kerry telephoned counterparts in Tehran, convinced the Iranians that the ships' movement was an accident and was not an intentional violation of Iran's territorial waters." - @NBCNews

UPDATE: James Taylor in route to Tehran with written apology, the newest porn releases and will serenade Iranian Military Commanders........ Developing.

Hey Iran, you have exactly 300 days left to push a US president around. Enjoy it while you can. After that, there will be hell to pay.

— Joe Scarborough (@JoeNBC) January 12, 2016

Obama To Once Again Thrill Us With His Teleprompter Skills and Last Annual Manure Spread Of His Presidency Tonight

We can once again expect more lying then a teenage boy with his pants around his ankles sitting in a squad car trying to explain to a Deputy why the Sheriff's daughter is in the back seat of his car naked from the waist up......

Watch Your Back Spicoli......

After inadvertently leading Police to the capture of the famous drug lord Joaquin “El Chapo” Guzman, who's violent tentacles reach far and wide, Mr.Spicoli may have just revived his award winning role as a "Dead Man Walking".

......of course there is always the 'Amish Witness Protection  Program'. 

A Good Monday Morning

We Don't Listen

Just as in the early part of the last century they were told what was to come. 

They didn't listen. 

 Once again we have been told exactly what is to come. 

And We Don't Listen.  

Houari Boumediene (1932-1978)

H/T Beth Rogers

Son of JFK and Marilyn Monroe Arrested in Plot to Kidnap Obama's Dog

Fox 5 WASHINGTON - A North Dakota man was arrested in Northwest D.C. after he allegedly planned to kidnap one of the Obama family’s dogs, according to court documents.  Secret Service agents took Scott Stockert, 49, into custody Wednesday at the Hampton Inn located at 901 6th Street. He arrived in the District alone, driving a pick-up truck from North Dakota.

During Stockert’s interview with agents, he allegedly stated that his parents were John F. Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe. He also said that he came to D.C. to go to the Capitol to advocate for $99 per month healthcare and to announce that he was running for president.

In court Friday, Stockert admitted to sending a text message to his daughter saying that he planned to take Bo, one of the first family's dogs, because he heard “they weren’t taking care of him.” He also said he was kidding.

As he was being transported, Stockert allegedly claimed to be Jesus Christ. According to court documents, he also stated, "You picked the wrong person to mess with. I will (expletive) your world up."

HT/MJA

Don't We All.......

Feral Islam

Tensions are high all over Europe because of Feral Muslims and acts of terrorism and rape, the latest ones being the mob attacks on German women in Cologne.

While acts of terrorism will come and go, and may even abate for long periods of time due to the efficiency of surveillance, acts of Muslim rape are much less likely to cease. They will continue to be a regular occurrence wherever Muslim migrants are housed, and can be expected to raise tensions between migrants and the native populace simmering over.  It's the result of the vast numbers of migrants who have arrived in Europe last year (conservatively estimated at between 750,000 and 1,500,000) and those who will arrive this year, the overwhelming majority are and will continue to be young males. One estimate is that 72% of them are adult men, with just 13% women, and 15% children. Many of the "children" are teenage boys, hormones in tennis shoes already feeling the first stirrings of sexual desire, while most of the adult men are in the more sexually virile age groups of twenties and thirties.

In other words, the great majority of these so called "Muslim Refugees" are males of an age at which they think almost ceaselessly about sex. It is a significant fact that these young men are moving from societies where women are routinely covered up and jealously guarded as property, into societies where they are allowed to wear whatever or as little as they like, and rarely feel endangered living in an advanced civilized culture.

The obvious outcome of all this is that those countries that are most accommodating to the refugees can expect to be on the receiving end of having their women regularly raped. They have invited their own trouble and downfall.

The Facebook Experiment: A MUST READ

 Mark Zuckerberg

IOTWReport:

On December 12, 2015, the Shurat HaDin – Israel Law Center opened 2 Facebook accounts. One was anti-Jew/Israel, the other was anti-Palestinian/Palestine.

They uploaded identical posts in terms of tone and pictures and verbiage. One being anti-Jew, the other being anti-Palestinian. They kept that up for days, ramping up the tone, but always in the same proportion on both pages.

On the same day they posted Death to all Jews on the Palestinian page and Death To All Palestinians on the Israeli page.

Then they reported each page to Facebook.

What do you think happened?

READ MORE

A Sternly Worded Letter

Dear President Orack,
I got Big Bomb like you! Ha! Who tie yu shoe lace in morning? You wife ugly like monkey butt! Ha Ha!   

Kim Jong #Un! 

Dear Korean Fat Kid, 
I get paid vacations to Hawaii and Martha's Vineyard any time I want, and all the chocolate cake I can eat! Ha!

President Orack  

P.S. We seem to agree on one thing, my wife. 

________________

*Thank You MJA for the Linkage* 

Their Elites Are Cackling Mad Scientists: Frankensteins....

I vill create new Germans hahahahhahaa!  Germans out of Africans and Arabs, yes! They say unmöglich, it can never be done they say, but they. vill. see!

"For centuries the Germans were wont to leave their homeland, emigrating to places such as America, where the Statue of Liberty welcomed them among the “huddled masses yearning to breathe free”. For all the Germans remaining at home, however, nationality remained a matter of “blood” (jus sanguinis in Latin) rather than choice or place of birth. That identity was built into the language itself.

All that is history and will definitively be buried in 2016. Today Germany is second only to America in the number of immigrants it attracts. Most come from within the European Union (EU), but many come from farther afield. Among rich countries Germany also takes by far the most refugees—today’s “huddled masses”. About 1m were expected in 2015 alone, and the numbers in 2016 are sure to be big too." 

The great Cathedrals shall become Mosques, the magnificent castles fall into ruin and the museums just empty shells...... 

She Wishes She Looked This Good.......

Eating Bugs May Not Be as Eco-friendly as You Think

UC Research -

"Crickets, considered a “gateway bug” and an ecologically viable food source, have become one of the latest food crazes - popping up on grocery store shelves in baked goods and even dog treats. 

But a UC Davis study cautions that while crickets do have the potential to increase the supply of dietary protein that we need to feed our exponentially growing population, their sustainability claims have been “overstated". 

University of California Cooperative Extension agronomist Mark Lundy informs us discerning non-bug consumers:

“Our study demonstrates that the sustainability gains associated with cultivating crickets as an alternative source of protein will depend, in large part, on what the crickets are fed and which systems of livestock production they are compared to.” 

In their experiment, crickets fed minimally processed food waste composed largely of straw died before they reached a harvestable size. Those fed processed food waste or raised on typical poultry feed only had a protein conversion rate that’s similar to chickens.

In other words, crickets can’t convert plants into protein more efficiently than chickens.  But if we can eventually find ways to efficiently farm crickets, edible bugs can be a part of our efforts to reduce greenhouse gas emissions while sustainably feeding a growing population." 

Ummm....I don't think so!

WH: Twitter Account Was One of Obama's “Top Accomplishment” in 2015

With not very many domestic policy accomplishments to point to, besides maybe lowering your golf handicap, and your foreign policy as largely a dumpster fire of failure and embarrassment, a year-end review list of your "best moments" might be slim.

Which explains why this year the White House's 2015 retrospective listed "joining Twitter" as one of President Obama's top events. Now, as the President's social media reach has expanded, and at least a chunk of his free time dedicated to spouting his every thought in 140 characters or less, the White House knows it has achieved at least something. But simply avoiding the President's speeches and press conferences in traditional media will not completely erase him from your daily life.

“Americans also shared in some more personal moments with the President, like when he walked across the Edmund Pettus Bridge 50 years after the first marches from Selma to Montgomery,” the blog post said. “Or when he sang ‘Amazing Grace’ in honor of those who lost their lives to gun violence in Charleston, South Carolina.” 

“Or when he launched his own Twitter and Facebook accounts to share personal messages on stories that touched millions across the country and reflected who we are as a people,” it said. 

“Whether it’s the best posts on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube or unforgettable moments with the First Lady or the Vice President, you’ll find all of the best ways to remember 2015 right here,” the post continued. “So take a look back at some of the most memorable moments of the year that meant so much for the American people, for President Obama, and for all of us here at the White House.”

Obama's historic Iran nuclear weapons fiasco deal, which has since been acknowledged as "unbinding," and his role in ending global climate change and saving the world from us went curiously unmentioned. Maybe they're saving those accomplishments for his epic biopic.

Thank You Larwyn’s Linx for the Linkage!

Middle Finger Theater Presents:

The Last Hand Gun on Earth

Hillary Faces the Music

Image via Springer's Blog

The DMF Asshat of the Year 'Lifetime Achivement Award'

It's been awhile since we have awarded the honor of 'Ass Hat of the Year' at DMF. The main reason being that in the later years of the Obama administration there has been so many qualified candidates in politics and the media falling out of the trees we simply could not narrow it down to one.  But with the sunset soon to descend on the career of one special Ass Hat of note, we must take this opportunity to recognize his stupendous Ass Hattery as we prepare to say goodbye good riddance. 

Our award winner came to national prominence in 2004 after the citizens of the great state of South Dakota came to their senses and booted off the public payroll (because they had grown increasingly frustrated by his aggressive opposition to most of George W's legislative initiatives and judicial nominations) the former King of the Senate Democrats, that vile and corrupt little man Tom Daschle. The dem's then chose as there Grand Poobah  the socially conservative, pro-life pro-gun Senator from Nevada.

The Stormin' Mormon, Dingy Harry Reid.

Harry was an odd choice for an odd time. It was the dark days of the Bush years: tax cuts for everyone and burning Dixie Chicks CDs and bombing the shit out of the crazy Muslim's sandbox.   

In 2006, Harry became the true exalted  King of the Senate Democrats, The Majority Leader. He quickly shed his cloak of moderation and became the consummate obstructionist of all and everything Republican. 

In 2008 Harry was a major force in backing as a candidate for President the black guy of which he described as: "light-skinned" appearance and speaking patterns "with no Negro dialect, unless he wanted to have one." Harry soon began, with the help of his House pal Nancy Pelosi, ramming the Negro with no Negro dialect agenda down the throats of America.

At some point, age began to catch up with Harry. He began to say stupid things, even for a King of the Senate Democrats.  Who can forget that strange and bizarre press conference during the 2012 election of which out of the blue Harry said this about Mitt Romney:  

“He didn’t pay taxes for 10 years! Now, do I know that that’s true? Well, I’m not certain,”

After Republicans seized control of the Senate in the devastating midterm election of 2014, Senate Majority Leader Harry was demoted once again to the lowly Senate Minority Leader position from which he came. The demotion was devastating and the slide into crazy became fast and steep. 

Harry began ranting and raving daily, in almost all his time at the Senate podium obsessing about the Koch Brothers. Day after day, speech after speech the ugly face of Koch addiction reared it's head until even some in the media started to question Harry's condition.

Then last year, tragedy stuck. While in his bathroom the little boxer got roughed up by getting on the bad side of his exercise resistance band named Vinnie. It beat him up pretty good, breaking a number of ribs and bones in his face, but seems to have cured his Koch addiction in the process. He should stop working out with big Italian guys.

Then last March, Dingy Harry announced he was retiring from the Senate. It must be a bitch for a power hungry politician to be regulated to second string.  But his constituents are grateful. A brothel in Nevada with an extinctive sex menu has offered to host Harry's retirement party to thank him for efforts that have “positively affected” the hookers of Nevada and health care for their tools of the trade.

The way we look at it, if Ted Kennedy was the "Lion of the Senate" Dingy Harry was the "Turd in the Punch bowl". And if you're driving through Nevada and see some guy in sunglasses mumbling and wander around aimlessly in the desert, just keep driving.......

*Thank You MJA for the Linkage*

A Good Monday Morning

A little Palate Cleanser After the Post Below

I'm Asking Ya.....

On January 27, 2006 this Lunatic Warn Us That We Would Destroy the Planet With Man Made Global Warming in 10 Years......

Well, Get Busy.
We Have Just 24 Days to Finish the Job!

Remembering the MSNBC Shows We Lost in 2015

2016 DMF 'Snark Hall of Fame' Inductees

After much debate, discussion, drinking, throwing of furniture and counting and recounting of votes, the soon to be highly coveted DMF/MFNS 2016 'Snark Hall of Fame' Awards are today announced. Honored this year are 2, for their wit, insight, original writings and photoshop talents, as well as their amazing ability to avoid being scooped up by the secret Service.....

It is our honor to present:

Patriot Retort

Our first inductee was last year inducted as part of a group effort, and we found her new singular venture every bit as worth of recognition. Dianny's new blog, Patriot Retort.com has quickly gained readership and a loyal following as she slashes her way through progressive thought with an excellent satirical slant and conservative opinion. Dianny is a self published writer and author, who's witty graphics are always well done, on target and makes you think, and laugh. You can find her work just about anywhere you go in the conservative blogoshere, including such prestigious pages as The American Thinker and IOTWReport. She works diligently to present original content with Dianny's own northeastern brand of snark and and satire. We are honored to include Dianny and The Patriot Retort as one of this years inductees. 

Political Clown Parade

Our second inductee this year is long overdue for award and recognition. One must look past the fact that for one week every year, this inductee and I are playful bitter rivals, gazing down the 50 yard line from opposite sidelines. Thankfully, the rest of the year we are friends, blog sisters and fellow patriots. Known to her readers for her every changing unique banners reflecting the mood and news of the times, to the biting original worded right jabs to the jaw of the political left. Her graphic work (an excellent example can be seen in the banner riding proudly at the top of this blog) is always crisply satirical, on spot and as professional looking as can be found anywhere on the internet. It is my joy and pleasure to induct Curmudgeon of 'The Political Clown Parade' into DMF Snark Hall of Fame. 

WAPO Columnist: We Have To Talk About Bill Clinton’s Penis Again.

Graphic via Freaking News

It’s a good thing Hillary Rodham Clinton is running for president, or else some people would be forced to find creative no-holes-barred ways to mention Bill Clinton’s most famous asset. Ever since he left office, it’s been hard to figure out by some how to insert the former president's notorious member into conversation. Which really hasn’t stopped anyone from trying. (Good job, Maureen Dowd!)

But now that the former Senator and former Secretary of State is running for the highest office in the land and blah blahing all the time, all over the place, about how we need a Strong Leader with girly parts, it’s irresponsible to talk about America's most notorious political penis.  Tell us why "Liberal" columnist Ruth Marcus: 

"Ordinarily, I would argue that the sins of the husband should not be visited on the wife. What Bill Clinton did counts against him, not her, and I would include in that her decision to stick with him. What happens inside a marriage is the couple’s business, and no one else’s, even when both halves crave the presidency." 

Marcus is one of those “liberal” “feminists” who is still SO MAD at Hillary Clinton, for letting her husband do infidelities to her, so of course there is a but:  

"Hillary Clinton has made two moves that lead me, gulp, to agree with Trump on the “fair game” front. She is (smartly) using her husband as a campaign surrogate, and simultaneously (correctly) calling Trump sexist...." These moves open a dangerous door. It should surprise no one that Trump has barged right through it....."

It makes perfect sense when you look at it that way, so long as you’ve also taken a whole metric load of acid first. Since Hillary “Doormat” Clinton unforgivably forgave her husband for doing stuff with his penis, and she has the audacity to let her spouse kiss the babies and the butter cow on the campaign trail like every other presidential candidate in history and she has observed (along with the rest of the radical man-eaters' sentients) that Donald Trump is a gross nasty sexist pig, Hillary Clinton started it, and it’s her fault for forcing Trump to bring Bill’s Big Dog into this, by being married to him.

Oh sorry, you probably didn’t take quite enough acid for that, did you?

The bottom line is that Hillary’s run for the Oval Office means the radical feminist and the  internet blogosphere can finally, in the name of “politics,” return to their national obsession of the past with the actions of Bill Clinton and his famous member!

Me, no I wouldn't think of stooping to that......